To ask to use the phone?

[LightingCandles]

I get a really good, half-price cheap deal with work on a SIM-only deal. We agreed I would go onto this SIM-only deal as it saves so much money. (Think about a tenner a month, no contract, unlimited everything)

I bought the SIM. Literally the same day, my phone stopped working.
I need a phone for work - think WhatsApp groups daily communications. This is non-negotiable. Work does not provide phones, everyone uses their own phone.

So I need a phone handset. I powered up an old phone we have. It is DC's old one, a huawei y6 (2019). Has gone through three DC, being factory reset each time but does have a cracked screen. It has WhatsApp, but doesn't do things like connect to my watch, I cannot download any apps at all as no space (so no parking app for example) Cannot use it to pay by card.

Due to being skint, we cannot buy me a new handset. See above re money saving.

DH has an old phone we managed to power up. It is an HTC one M8(2014). It is no better than the old one from the DC.

For comparison, DC1 has an iPhone they got as a birthday present. DC2 has a Samsung A41, again a present and DC3 has a hand-me-down Samsung.

DH however, has three phones. One for work. And two for personal use. One does not have a sim. He uses it when the other one needs to charge.

I asked to use the one without a sim. Apparently not ok, he doesn't want to give it up.

So I have to choose between a 2019 phone with no space, that barely does the minimum or a 2014 phone that is slower than slow.

AIBU to ask for the non-sim phone so I have a half-decent phone? Or is it rude as 1) I technically have a phone, 2)it does what I need (but not what I want) and 3) he still technically uses it.

Cos he did say he would prefer not to give it up. And I could use either of the other two old ones. And now I feel guilty.

Well if he wont give you one you will have to buy one. Apple have refurbished ones on website from £369, you can pay over 36 months so £10ish a month

If he’s at home all day then he can just charge his normal phone and let you use the spare.

He’s making stupid excuses to put his needs over yours and is generally being a selfish prick.

In the nicest way OP you've got nothing to feel guilty about. I'd question what's going on behind the scenes to make you feel guilty, when it's crystal clear that the problem is him ranking his wants above your needs.

So he's not working and has 2 perfectly working phones, yet you, the working person has one that is not functional/practical.

Here's an idea, he charges it every night like the rest of us who only has one phone.

He may be depressed etc but that's not excuse for being a selfish prick.

As the previous poster said if you require a work phone it should be supplied.I'd take a careful look at any work policies around phones. My workplace policy says I can be disciplined for using my own phone in certain circumstances, if I lose it the IT dept can remotely delete it. Obviously I've refused this and they've had to supply me with a phone and laptop.

Why would they give everyone a phone?
Because it's for their benefit.
I've refused to install Whatsapp on my personal phone whenever I've been asked to by my employer.
Just like when they started asking me to take photos for work and send them I refused until they bought me a phone.
They're your employer - it's their responsibility.

Can he seriously not be without a phone while one is charging? 😳 that's insane!

@CombatBarbie

So he's not working and has 2 perfectly working phones, yet you, the working person has one that is not functional/practical.

Here's an idea, he charges it every night like the rest of us who only has one phone.

He may be depressed etc but that's not excuse for being a selfish prick.

Not sure what you read but it clearly says he is working - had 3 phones, one of which is a work phone.

Your work need to supply you with a phone if they expect you to use one for work purposes. I would have thought they'd want their staff to be using something more secure than Whatsapp but OK.

Your husband's greediness with his own 3 phones is a separate issue.

Work is not going to provide a phone. It has been challenged previously.

I would be doing a disservice to myself and my site and my team (both my managers above and my staff below) if I just refused to join the work WhatsApp due to them not providing one. Please can we leave that alone?

What would your work do if you didn't have a mobile phone?

I don't have one...

Wow, my partner can be pretty selfish but he would 100% give me his spare phone!!

Your partner is a selfish tosser. Say you need the phone and take it. His excuse for needing it is pathetic.

@Cakelover17 erm fairly certain I am reading the same thread as per my original post. OP says he is currently signed off sick. I am disregarding the work phone as it is a work phone. He still has 2 personal phones.

Oh bollocks does it have no sim. He's having an affair. I'd bet money that a bit of poking around would reveal a mystery sim card that he knows nothing about. No one needs two personal phones. You can use a phone while charging it.

Buy him a portable battery pack and tell him to stop being such a selfish cunt.
Or he can use his work phone to do that. It’s really not normal to have 3 phones!!

@LightingCandles

To repeat, the second phone HAS NO SIM. He uses it to connect to the internet and watch youtube when his other phone dies. He is not cheating. He is signed off work with depression and alcoholism and barely leaves bed or the house. The 'selfishness' possibly comes from the above.

Hence my guilt.

If he's currently not using his workphone as he's signed off can't he use the workphone when his other phone needs charging or just make sure his phone is charged?

@Notanotherwindow

Oh bollocks does it have no sim. He's having an affair. I'd bet money that a bit of poking around would reveal a mystery sim card that he knows nothing about. No one needs two personal phones. You can use a phone while charging it.

Just stop please. It does not have a sim. I know this as a fact. Like I said, he barely leaves the house. He is categorically not cheating. When he does, it is with one of the DC on the weekend to do the groceries. or to take them/pick them up.

So please stop.

yanbu....but are you saying he is an alcoholic? actually drinking now? Because youve got bigger problems than him not letting you have his old phone..... I am not going to go the oh he's cheating route but you are looking after him and supporting him and he won't let you have his old phone? I mean that is mean as fuck.

To repeat, the second phone HAS NO SIM. He uses it to connect to the internet and watch youtube when his other phone dies

Why can't he do that on his work phone?

If he's at home all the time he has no reason to need a second phone for when the first dies. He can just plug it in and charge it.

He should give you a phone.

My take on it for what it is worth. Your DH has three phones, he really doesn't need the one without a sim, you do. For me it really is quite that simple. Expecting you to use a phone ( not just for work for but for your day to day use) with a cracked screen that won't support apps, because he dose not want to share is selfish.

I also believe you can use a phone while it is charging, so his logic of wanting a spare for when his "other" one is charging seems a bizarre excuse.

When he says he would prefer not to give up he old phone, can you point out that he's not giving it up, he's lending it till you can afford a new one?

Has he always been a selfish tosser or is this recent behaviour?

3 phones is an insane amount. He should give you the sim-less one and stop being so bloody selfish.