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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think I am going to be starving at this wedding?

795 replies

Aztecprint6 · 06/03/2022 16:23

Wedding breakfast is at 4:30pm.

Evening food will be wedding cake and some cheese.

AIBU to think I am going to have to bring along a sandwich and some late night snacks?

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 07/03/2022 09:10

There’s no need for that. I’m perfectly healthy with a perfectly normal appetite.

Not everyone is the same.

I’m getting fed up of being called fat, greedy or unwell because I am different to you.

LuckySantangelo35 · 07/03/2022 09:10

@jb7445 Imagine going to a wedding and clarting about a massive handbag with a pack of Jacobs crackers in! 🤣 You wouldn’t be ‘popular’ at best you’d be a source of bemusement at worst you’d be seen as a bit weird/rude

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 07/03/2022 09:11

Not RTFT (too cross) but as a matter of interest, OP, if you think you’’ ll be starving at this wedding what word would you use to describe people in the Third World in the grip of famine etc who might not have eaten for days?

jb7445 · 07/03/2022 09:20

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

KineticSand · 07/03/2022 09:25

I went to a wedding with that exact arrangement and thought it would be fine. We were quite hungry when the cheese table was ready and went to tuck in. There was tonnes of cheese, no bread and hardly any crackers! Ended up absolutely starving as the staff cleared the cheese away as soon as all the crackers had gone. There were whole rounds of entire cheeses untouched. A few guests even asked them to leave the cheese out as we were eating just lumps of cheese at this point, but they said they'd been asked to clear it. I asked if they could bring out more crackers but they said the bride and groom provided the cheese etc not the venue. We were pretty hungry. It would have been fine though if the cheese to cracker ratio had been ok.

I was kicking myself, I usually take a stash of flapjacks in my handbag to weddings for the long waits between food but I hadn't that time.

KineticSand · 07/03/2022 09:27

I would have been instant best friends with the PP with the cream crackers in her handbag!

Doratheexploret · 07/03/2022 09:30

Sounds like a normal day really! We usually eat around 5pm and that’s it. You’ll be starting to eat around dinner time and there will still be cheese etc in the evening, it’s not going to be a dairylea triangle! Do you usually have snacks after your evening meal?

WouldIBeATwat · 07/03/2022 09:32

@Doratheexploret

Sounds like a normal day really! We usually eat around 5pm and that’s it. You’ll be starting to eat around dinner time and there will still be cheese etc in the evening, it’s not going to be a dairylea triangle! Do you usually have snacks after your evening meal?
I generally don’t eat breakfast/lunch till well past noon. Usually 3pm-ish. So yes, I do have a meal later on in the evening 9pm-ish).
WouldIBeATwat · 07/03/2022 09:32

just demonstrating that what is normal to one person isn’t normal to the next.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 07/03/2022 09:36

@SukiToast

Also, I'm laughing at the idea of you genuinely believing a cheese course will just be a "block of cheese". You know rightly it won't be, you're just being pedantic for the sake of it.
Yes,quite Hmm
peboh · 07/03/2022 09:43

It's one day, where you'll just eat at slightly different times than usual. It won't kill you, and even if you are a little hungry it's not the end of the world. Go grab something after the reception.
There's a literal war going on, and your complaining that your 3 course meal is going to served at a time you normally wouldn't eat. I despair at people sometimes.

SmallestInTheClass · 07/03/2022 09:59

The wedding breakfast is the evening meal, not late lunch. It sounds fine to me. Plan on an early lunch (I usually do light packed lunch for these kind of things) and have it at 12 in the hotel/car beforehand. I'd be much more put out by at a main meal at 9pm at any social event, but that just shows we are l different. Have a bit of tolerance for the bride and groom and change the timing of your meals to suit them for one day.

dinosaurcookie · 07/03/2022 10:03

I agree with the op. I went to a wedding where the main buffet ran out before the last three tables (one of which was mine) went up so the fear is real. Taking snacks is not greedy, it's a sensible back up plan.

Lastqueenofscotland · 07/03/2022 10:04

I went to a wedding like this
Three course meal was VERY substantial at about 5pm
The cheeseboard was enourmous with a huge variety of bread and crackers to have with it.

Roussette · 07/03/2022 10:07

Maybe pop a pack of Jacob's Cream Crackers in your handbag and dole them out to any other hungry looking guests too, to eat with the cheese?

Where has it been said it's just cheese? It hasn't.

I have never ever gone to a wedding (and I've been to lots) and fretted about the food like this. I go to celebrate someone's wedding, have fun, see people and chat, and eat whatever is offered whenever it's offered.
I love my food, I love my drink by the way.

CornishGem1975 · 07/03/2022 10:13

People do realise that it's okay to be hungry, right?

I mean chances are you wouldn't be, but even if you were...you won't keel over because you've not eaten to your satisfaction.

LuckySantangelo35 · 07/03/2022 10:15

@CornishGem1975

People do realise that it's okay to be hungry, right?

I mean chances are you wouldn't be, but even if you were...you won't keel over because you've not eaten to your satisfaction.

Some people do apparently!
Icemast · 07/03/2022 10:15

@CornishGem1975

People do realise that it's okay to be hungry, right?

I mean chances are you wouldn't be, but even if you were...you won't keel over because you've not eaten to your satisfaction.

Medical needs aside I think some people are afraid of being hungry. Same with young children, the amount of 'just in case' snacks people seem to take out and about with them when only going for a walk or whatever just in case they're peckish is setting up really bad habits imo. I'm not against snacking, having more to eat if been really active or whatever, but absolutely nothing wrong with feeling hungry as long as you are eating sufficient calories and a balanced diet. In fact I think some have forgotten what it feels like to not be constantly topped up with food!
PurpleDaisies · 07/03/2022 10:17

It is obviously ok to be hungry but on a day when you’re likely to be drinking a lot, dancing and moving a round a fair bit, it’s not particularly nice.

People really don’t seem to understand that a wedding is not just a normal day.

PurpleDaisies · 07/03/2022 10:20

@Lastqueenofscotland

I went to a wedding like this Three course meal was VERY substantial at about 5pm The cheeseboard was enourmous with a huge variety of bread and crackers to have with it.
And I’ve been to weddings where the main meal was tiny and the buffet ran out before I got any food.

How are you supposed to know in advance which type of wedding it will be? It’s not like a restaurant where you can just order a bigger pudding or some extra bread if your food is too small.

grey12 · 07/03/2022 10:27

Eat well at lunch before you go and then have a second slice of cake Wink

Baconandmaplesyrup · 07/03/2022 10:29

There’s a lot of really worrying that a three course meal followed by cheese board and then wedding cake isn’t enough food in a five hour period going on here.

It’s totally fine if it’s not enough food for you personally then you bring additional food to supplement the five courses and you can go and sit and eat it in private,. However the bride and groom are providing more than enough food, just for some people they need an awful lot more, and that’s fine too. We are all different.

LuckySantangelo35 · 07/03/2022 10:31

@PurpleDaisies

It is obviously ok to be hungry but on a day when you’re likely to be drinking a lot, dancing and moving a round a fair bit, it’s not particularly nice.

People really don’t seem to understand that a wedding is not just a normal day.

@PurpleDaisies how vigorous is your dancing?? A bit of shimmying about on a dance floor and walking around venue is not like running a marathon and cause calorie expenditure to the extent that you need a constant supply of food!
Fatgalslim · 07/03/2022 10:38

I don't like cheese, I'd be fucked

PurpleDaisies · 07/03/2022 10:46

I’m not saying anything about needing a constant supply of food. I’m saying that eating outside if my normal pattern is going to have me hungry or hammered. That’s why I would take snacks.

It affects nobody if I do that. I don’t know why it’s causing such consternation.