Jo Malone candles and MIL.

[Flatdeadfrog]

I've name changed as details are a little bit outing as I've talked to friends about this.

My MIL is a bit of a scented candle aficionado and can be a bit precious about the types of scented candles she'll have in the house. That's fair enough, as you like what you like. BUT for mothers day, she has specified she wants a new scented candle for her hall.

DH likes to oblige his mum as she's actually lovely, but his default is to just buy an expensive Jo Malone candle. We don't actually have a Jo Malone budget, as we are feeling the pinch as I am on maternity leave and we're struggling a bit financially because of it.

DH and I have had an argument about it tonight, as I feel that MIL would be upset to think that we're spending our weekly food budget on an expensive candle (and frankly I think it's a waste), but DH really wants to get something nice for his mum. MIL loves scented candles, but something cheaper like a Yankee candle would just be shoved to the back of the cupboard.

AIBU to think MIL can do without a candle this year? Or can anybody recommend anything nice scent/candle wise that wouldn't get wasted like a Yankee candle would?

MIL is lovely, she would be appalled at the idea we'd spent our weekly food shop on a candle, but DH can't see past getting his mum a gift for mothers day and getting what she's asked for.

Just in case no one posted this yet, an Iggy Box scented candle subscription is a great gift. They all seem to be high quality independent makers and the boxes have other little treats in. I got three months for my DH and we have discovered some lovey new candle companies through it.

https://iggybox.co.uk/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI34a7K6o9gIVn49oCR1KMAFKEAAYASAAEgJJ7fDBwE

Prices candles. are reasonably priced and their heritage range look nice. They supply the queen so if its good enough for her Maj then its good enough for MIL.

over 50 notes for a poncy candle....madness....thats a flight to spain or elsewhere....!!!

@RumJerrySailorRum

Partylite are lovely candles for future gift buying reference.

Also, Oliver Drew.

But, as every one else has said, TK Maxx and Homesense are your best bet. Loads of beautiful scents and jars.

Try the clearance section first.

Yes and no nasty toxins

I think she is being grabby. It's rude to expect expensive presents from your dc especially in these times

Jo Mason is owned by boots or loreal or something now anyway- she sold it years ago. Not worth the price tag

Self Care co candles! Natural essential oils, really good scent throw and WAY better than Jo Malone!

MIL has a Bengal cat.. she has expensive tastes...

No to Aldi but I wouldn't say no

@yoyo1234

"Why can't people just talk to one another?

OP to husband: we can't seriously spend a week's food money on a Mother's Day present.

Husband to his mother: Sorry, Mum, but money's tight this year. I love you just the same, though, and here's (insert nice, thoughtful thing that doesn't cost the earth). Big hug.

The End."

That is perfect, though sometimes even when you try to do something similar to above it doesn't work, you're basically told no you still have to exchange countless gifts even when you're struggling to feed/clothe a baby/child.

God, it's insane, isn't it?

OP, your updates suggest that your husband is the issue here, really. Can you not have a proper conversation with him about the fact that you are on maternity leave and money is tight (he must know this, surely??), so he needs to lower his mum's expectations? My children are adults, and have very little money (students). I would be embarrassed if they spent pretty much anything on a MD gift. I'd far rather they made dinner/cup of tea/did something nice and thoughtful that cost nothing at all! I could in fact afford to buy my mum a JM candle, but I just send her a card for MD. We are not geographically close, but we are close enough emotionally not to prove it by spending money. I think your husband needs to have a serious re-think of priorities, and in a case where there is not loads of spare money swilling around, his priority needs to be his own family.

How about Neom - they are lovely

Definitely agree with previous poster - Wonky Candle! Amazing young man and his family.

I vote for White Company- very lovely, at the same level of quality as JM but much much cheaper. If you sign up for their newsletter they will probably send you a voucher code, plus they gift wrap things beautifully if you go into a store

Are Diptyque candles worry the money?

*worth

Haven't read the whole thread so apologies if repetitious but Seven Seventeen candles are beautiful and more affordable than JM.

@SlashBeef

Please not Aldi I have a family member that always gives Aldi beauty products and I would hand on heart prefer no gift at all. TK Maxx definitely worth a try.

You are mad! I spent years buying high end products, I absolutely love ALDI products now. They are so good as far as I am concerned.

Try White Company - half the price of Jo Malone but still a 'luxury' brand. The fresh grapefruit or orange rind scents are lovely and would be really fresh in a hallway for spring/summer.

I can't stand the Aldi ones. Everyone raves about them and how close they smell to JM ones but I was given 3 for Christmas and they give me a horrendous headache and the pomegranate one smells really synthetic.

If I won the Lottery I would have wall to wall Diptyque (actually far better than Jo Malone) but there are many, many lovely candles around at a fraction of the price of either. With others recommend TK Maxx and also look at Etsy and the many other small sellers online.

I'd be mortified if I thought someone was blowing their household budget to buy me a gift.

Ebay!

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Jo-Malone-Candle-Gift-Set-with-3-Scented-Candles-in-blue-velvet-Box-/185284464142?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l6249&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0

Does she provide any babysitting services or childcare for you?

Will your DH benefit from an inheritance when she dies?

@BurscoughBooths

Don’t bother with the Aldi candles; they are in no way comparable with a decent candle. There are decent alternatives to Jo Malone. How much are you wanting DH to spend?

Totally disagree , i am very choosy about candles , after using aldi no14 diffuser -velvety rose , i have now bought the candle . I am very impressed ,so much better than a lot more expensive candles i have bought. However it sounds like your mil wouldn't be very impressed with an aldi one - her loss !

I also think the candles in tk maxx/homesense are fantastic. There are a lot of very expensive candles hugely reduced in a variety of scents and holders. Many of them are soy which is better for your health as there are no toxins released into the atmosphere

Could you perhaps have a word with MIL, and explain that money's tight this year, but because she mentioned the Jo Malone candle your DH is desperate to get her one as he wants to spoil her. If she's as nice as you think, she would probably then tell him that she's gone off them and would prefer some flowers or chocolates instead. Just a thought.

Oliver Bonas ones are lovely and come boxed in beautiful packaging -£25

Surely she’s aware you’re not flush currently? Is your dh too scared of her to say so? He’d seriously rather blow the food budget for the week? And why the bloody hell are you buying it? It’s HIS mother! Sod that for a game of soldiers. No to both.

I just had a look ... bloody hell, people seriously pay THAT MUCH for a scented candle? Wow.