Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Resigned but asked to stay

101 replies

Anon7774 · 01/03/2022 18:03

posted in staff room but posting here too for more traffic

I resigned mid November to leave at Easter. I gave plenty of notice considering resignation for Easter date was actually yesterday. My head whose an absolutely lovely woman has been very supportive of my decision, but today requested if I can stay till July as a favour to them as they finding it hard to fill my role.

I made it clear no I cannot but been asked to think over it and let her know end of week.

I’m really struggling with life, kids and husband and she knows it so is she being a CF by asking me this? Should I feel guilty? Is there any benefit for me to stay?

Just for context I am not going to another job and money is not an issue if I don’t fit for a year or so. Once I’ve sorted myself out I can easily find another job or even supply. I have supplied when my kids were very young and I loved it. Would love to do supply again so not in huge need to stay in this job. What shall I do?

OP posts:
WouldIwasShookspeared · 01/03/2022 18:06

I'd say desperate rather than CF.

If you don't want to then say no. They'll have to cope.

If you wanted to help but dont want to stay as you are, what about offering to go part time until July so they've fewer hours to cover?

ItsSnowJokes · 01/03/2022 18:06

You don't want to stay so just say no its not possible. They will always try it on as so many are leaving teaching. Supply teachers are in such demand that a lot of schools are struggling to get them and it also costs a lot more. Stick to your guns if you want to go.

CastleCrasher · 01/03/2022 18:07

You've given lots of reasons to go and none to stay, other than feeling guilty, which you shouldn't. You've given far more notice than you needed to, you owe them nothing.

CareBear50 · 01/03/2022 18:07

You have given her five months notice. That is plenty! You have gone above n beyond already . Good luck x

JackieCollinshasnoauthority · 01/03/2022 18:08

Leave because you want to leave.

I think it's understandable that she's asked but that shouldn't change your decision.

RedWingBoots · 01/03/2022 18:08

Tell her "No" as you have life things planned that you can't put off any longer. If she asks about your plans say you don't want to discuss them.

I have friends who resigned for stress related reasons who were asked to stay on. They just left as planned. One left to sort out his health and fitness before getting another job. If he hadn't he would probably have had a heart attack/stroke.

Hankunamatata · 01/03/2022 18:10

No they are not CF for asking but your free to say no.
Assuming your a teacher its incredibly hard to get decent teachers at the moment even more so sub teachers.

DamnUserName21 · 01/03/2022 18:10

No, she is not being a cheeky fucker at all. She asked in case you'd be able to.
There is no need to feel guilty. You have done right by them by given plenty of notice.
As for any benefit, that's for you to figure out.
I'm a not a teacher--is it bad form to leave in school year??

Gowithme · 01/03/2022 18:10

If you don't want to then don't, there's nothing to feel guilty about you gave them a huge amount of notice. Is there any compromise that would work for you ie staying but only part time or being supply for them a couple of days a week? I don't know if that would help them or be something you'd want to do it's just a thought.

Happylittlethoughts · 01/03/2022 18:11

Go! You are not paid to problem solve this issue. Someone else is - let them earn their money. You have been more than helpful working out such a long notice. Off you pop and enjoy your time out 😁Jealous teacher here

MaizeAmaze · 01/03/2022 18:19

She's probably desperate, and hoping finding someone for September would be easier.
But, you want to go. Go back to her at the end of the week, and let her know after careful consideration you will be unable to work after Easter (I think technically it's the 30 April you are contracted to, which could include the first few days back after Easter)

Original poster
Anon7774 · 01/03/2022 18:21

I’m a people pleaser. I know I will just give in and stay. I need a break from everything. Lots of people have left recently without even giving their notice in! It’s a really pressured environment. I am worried about my career down the line but I know I’m a good teacher and by doing supply I will hopefully find something. I’m mentally not here for my family as my mind is at work all the time.

OP posts:
DockOTheBay · 01/03/2022 18:21

@Hankunamatata

No they are not CF for asking but your free to say no. Assuming your a teacher its incredibly hard to get decent teachers at the moment even more so sub teachers.
Especially in the middle of the year. I went on maternity leave at Easter in 2018 and they couldn't find a mat cover who was actually qualified.
Original poster
Anon7774 · 01/03/2022 18:21

Will it really affect my career? I don’t intend on working for next 3 years and just doing supply. What does everyone think?

OP posts:
kitcat15 · 01/03/2022 18:22

No shes not being a CF ..... if you don't ask you don't get....but you just say no ....end of

DockOTheBay · 01/03/2022 18:22

@Anon7774

I’m a people pleaser. I know I will just give in and stay. I need a break from everything. Lots of people have left recently without even giving their notice in! It’s a really pressured environment. I am worried about my career down the line but I know I’m a good teacher and by doing supply I will hopefully find something. I’m mentally not here for my family as my mind is at work all the time.
If you're a secondary or older years primary teacher I would recommend private tutoring as a way to keep your skills up and its pretty flexible and good money.
DockOTheBay · 01/03/2022 18:25

Also exam marking for secondary teachers

Stompythedinosaur · 01/03/2022 18:27

Of course you don't need to stay, there is no reason to!

"Thank you, but I don't need to think it over. I can let you know now that it won't be possible."

Tiredmum122 · 01/03/2022 18:31

Why not stay, have a few periods of absence on them and enjoy the extra cash the paid for summer holiday will bring. The advantage of staying is a bit extra in your pension and the fact you would be able to take time off for any other interview you might have. If you are in secondary the work.load lessens when the exams are over and that is not lo g away .

SleepingFrog · 01/03/2022 18:31

Staying a whole extra term will feel a lot longer than it sounds. Personally I'd leave as planned. Summer term can be very draining and it's usually two longer half terms with tired, hot children too.

Crumbleburntbits · 01/03/2022 18:32

Keep saying no to them @Anon7774. You need to put yourself first because you’ve said you are struggling. You don’t need to discuss any reasons for leaving other than being absolutely definite that you won’t be staying on.

The school will have to get supply teachers to cover your work until they find a permanent replacement. Your career will be affected far more if you end up having a breakdown rather than a break.

Suprima · 01/03/2022 18:35

Absolutely not- go.

Two long sweaty half terms? Parents evenings and reports?

Say no and don’t look back. Enjoy your time- you have given them plenty of notice. Their staffing issue is not your problem.

Crimesean · 01/03/2022 18:38

Are you teaching GCSE or A-Level? If so I'd think really hard about whether you can make it through to June, because it's the kids who will suffer if you don't.

Any other age - yes, it's disruptive, but they've had months to hire a replacement - they'll just have to cope.

Original poster
Anon7774 · 01/03/2022 18:41

No not teaching any exam classes.

OP posts:
BIWI · 01/03/2022 18:41

I bet when you're in front of a class you're not a people pleaser. I bet you take charge!

Use that and stick to your guns. You don't have to be rude about it, just polite but firm.

Your head isn't being a CF though. That's a bit rude of you.

Swipe left for the next trending thread