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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DP being childish.

111 replies

supersop60 · 27/02/2022 12:03

Just a short one, and venting really.
DP decided to change the bedding this morning, and complained that 'all of the duvet covers are missing'. (they're not)
Anyway, he went to work and I went to put a clean cover on, and couldn't find the dirty one anywhere - not in the wash basket, or in a pile. So I rang him - where's the duvet cover you took off?
reply - 'it's in the back of my car, I'm taking it to the dump, I've always hated it'
To which I replied 'Fuck that. I'm going to throw away all the stuff of yours that I hate!'
WIBU?

OP posts:
2020nymph · 27/02/2022 13:19

[quote supersop60]It's this one. Not terrible.
images.dunelm.com/30682964.jpg?$standardplayerdefault$&img404=noimagedefault[/quote]

Hahaha! We had this one too and DH apparently always hated it. When we redecorated, it ended up in textile recycling!

Nanny0gg · 27/02/2022 13:19

All this froth over a perfectly inoffensive duvet cover. There are many worse out there and I don't see why everyone has to be rude about it.

It's clearly coming to the final straw for the OP and that's more to the point really.

Zoom101 · 27/02/2022 13:20
Hankunamatata · 27/02/2022 13:21

When he said all the covers were missing, did you show him they were in the airing cupboard?

Duvet cover is awful imo bit totally weird to take it to take it to the dump unless he has already mentioned disliking it previously

Marvellousmadness · 27/02/2022 13:23

The duvet is hideous haha but
Your husband sounds like an idiot
And you sound like you need a divorce by your overreaction...

Original poster
supersop60 · 27/02/2022 13:25

He has sent a text from work:
'Sorry, it was driving me bonkers. I'll bring it back and put it in the washing basket'
Good.
Now we need to have a talk.

OP posts:
AlternativePerspective · 27/02/2022 13:26

So what is the backstory here exactly?

Because TBH people always seem to claim there’s “a backstory” to justify their actions in a relationship.

On the face of it you’re both equally childish, and if this is how you’ve both behaved for the past 22 years it must be exhausting for both of you and your children.

7eleven · 27/02/2022 13:27

Things can get weirdly out of hand if people are tired or stressed I think. This reminds me of a time when my husband wouldn’t give me my teddy (yes I know. I was in my 20s Grin). I was so furious I picked up his phone and threatened to throw it out of the bedroom window. I actually think I would have as well. Makes me laugh now.

oohaarghoohaargh · 27/02/2022 13:29

I've got that duvet set!

Original poster
supersop60 · 27/02/2022 13:29

Anyone who thinks I am overreacting can read my other threads about DP.
I am generally a calm, laid-back, people pleaser.
That's probably my problem. Today I snapped.

OP posts:
Clarinet1 · 27/02/2022 13:31

@7eleven

Things can get weirdly out of hand if people are tired or stressed I think. This reminds me of a time when my husband wouldn’t give me my teddy (yes I know. I was in my 20s Grin). I was so furious I picked up his phone and threatened to throw it out of the bedroom window. I actually think I would have as well. Makes me laugh now.
Teddy as in bear or teddy as in underwear?

OP - I don’t object to the duvet cover - I think it’s quite pretty.

girlmom21 · 27/02/2022 13:34

@supersop60

Anyone who thinks I am overreacting can read my other threads about DP. I am generally a calm, laid-back, people pleaser. That's probably my problem. Today I snapped.
Considering the sheer number of posts, going back at least 8 years, you've clearly been unhappy for a very long time. Why do you stay?
7eleven · 27/02/2022 13:42

@Clarinet1 it was a snuggly, little, stuffed animal Smile

godmum56 · 27/02/2022 13:44

[quote supersop60]@MsHampton - what makes it funny?
@IsItTooHotInHere - I'm starting to stick up for myself. He has form for riding roughshod, and I have always let him.[/quote]
more fool you

stripeyflowers · 27/02/2022 13:45

I'd just be glad DH took it upon himself to change the bed without being prompted. Smile

Justilou1 · 27/02/2022 13:46

Oh boy… I’d be using this as the excuse I’d been waiting for to take MIL for a drive (to the dump.)

GlamorousHeifer · 27/02/2022 13:59

The duvet cover is lovely and even if it is not to others tastes I think its bloody rude to come on here and say so!

SpilltheTea · 27/02/2022 14:03

You could chuck them all and pick ones you both like. If he feels so strongly about your duvet, than surely he understands how you feel about MIL's?

BatmanOrRobin · 27/02/2022 14:06

This thread is cracking me up as I have that duvet cover and I've been meaning to get rid of it for a while Grin

Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 27/02/2022 14:07

Getting rid of a twat dh is most satisfying op

Def recommend it.

stripeyflowers · 27/02/2022 14:17

Genuinely, I would use it as an opportunity for a brand new duvet. You most probably do need to replace it.

Has he done similar things before, OP?

Ttcfinalbub · 27/02/2022 14:17

Is there a chance he pooped the bed ?

Original poster
supersop60 · 27/02/2022 14:21

@Ttcfinalbub

Is there a chance he pooped the bed ?
I really hope not. He got up first.
OP posts:
Original poster
supersop60 · 27/02/2022 14:32

@stripeyflowers

Genuinely, I would use it as an opportunity for a brand new duvet. You most probably do need to replace it.

Has he done similar things before, OP?

Yes. A box of my GM's crockery, which had been in MY car on the way to Auction House, went missing. DP - it was making a noise, so I took it to a charity shop. He didn't- it went to the dump. My Philadelphus tree is outside the back door, smells beautiful and is my favourite thing in the garden - DP chops it back to almost nothing just as it's about to flower because 'it was getting a bit wild'. It took 2 years to recover. DP chops off the flower heads of Hydrangea when they got to that lovely papery stage - 'well they were dead'. Painted the kitchen doors dark green, when I said I wanted cream, while I was away and didn't know! because 'it's a better colour'. I'm sure there's more but you get the idea. All of the above were following discussions so he knew my thoughts and feelings and chose to ignore them.
OP posts:
BibiBlocksberg · 27/02/2022 14:56

That is definitely a beautiful duvet cover NOT worthy of the dump.

Well done for rescuing it OP & reminding me to buy a set if Dunelm still stock it.

Bought the blind with same motif a couple of years ago & it makes me ridiculously happy to look at every day #the little things# :)