AIBU to know diets don’t work but also need to lose 3-4 stone

[MoirasWigStand]

I’m the fattest I’ve ever been. 5’6” and weigh 14st 11. There is a reason, I had health issues last year which meant no exercise (even walking) for almost a year, as well as a period of time on steroids (which made me pile on weight).

I really, really, need to lose it now. I can exercise (although my efforts are pretty pathetic so far!). I started calorie counting and lost 6lbs in January, but it’s gone back on after a few stress do l weeks.

And I found it so hard. 1500 calories is so little food 😂. I clearly have issues with stress eating and bingeing. Also when ‘bored’ at home when wfh.

I need a massive kick up the arse. I know diets don’t work, I’ve read those books. But I really need to lose some weight, I’m disgusted in myself.

@Gigitree

Sorry OP I think where you’re going wrong is looking to mumsnet for advice. YANBU diets don’t work and it’s proven. I would say focus on health promoting behaviours rather than weight loss ones. I.e aim for 5 portions of fruit and veg per day, exercise regularly doing something you will enjoy, don’t smoke, drink in moderation etc.

This 100% Intermittent fasting is initially great for weightloss but it's no good if you binge in food on your non fast days. Calorie counting is depressing. Long term, eating healthily' cutting out the crap you eat is your best bet at keeping it off. Who wants to calorie count / fast all their lives? Change your eating habits to sustain a healthy weight. It's what I'm going to do. Tired of dieting.

You can pack a lot of food in for 1500 calories. It has to be the right kind though. And it's a permanent change, not a short term one - you can't go back to the way you eat now. What works for me is not buying certain tempting foods in the first place, eating mainly my usual food but smaller portions. And not letting one big meal (dinner out, birthday etc) derail me. Also I cut down alcohol to two glasses a week, and I log everything on My Fitness Pal app. I also walk more - you don't have to go to the gym if you don't enjoy it. Exercise for your heart but the battle of the bulge is won in the kitchen. Aim for slow and steady - if you loose 1-2lbs a week you'll have lost up to 2 stone by summer.

Give over jack

You were calmly presented with statements showing there is much out there to contradict to your ‘evidence’ and told you were wrong to continue promulgate your ‘evidence’ on rapid weight loss because it’s untrue and no clear evidence exists.

Now you’re saying that your beliefs are actually based on anecdote and experience, and that this is good enough for you, thus completely ignoring your persistence in your previous Google (non)evidence.

So you don’t have evidence?! Fine nobody cares, but honestly, to keep going on about it when you are presented with swathes of resources which show the opposite!

And You insulted me first! If you don’t like it, then don’t dish it out!

The only time I've successfully lost weight is by avoiding sugar. Unnatural and added that is, I still ate fruit etc. I was surprised by how successful it was and how good I felt all round. Unfortunately I crept back into it but I'm going to give it a go again.

@DockOTheBay

What do I eat for lunch then apart from salad? I don’t mind salad, but it’s a faff to prepare and boring after a while Bread-less lunches: Omelet, boiler eggs, crustless quiche Jacket potato Soup Crudités and houmous

Have you been looking in my lunch box? 🤣 This is pretty much my 'go to' lunch list ☺️

Diets don't work. So much of what you've said resonates - look up Slimpod. I'm over a stone down since the beginning of January and there's no diet. It's advertised as a change for life. Good luck.

While having to precisely calorie count by weighing everything definitely isn't sustainable, I have found doing it for a while very helpful. It's told me where I was eating the extra calories, some of which I was aware of but sometimes I wasn't aware of how bad some things were. It's also helped me work out, for example, that when I crave something sweet what's ok to be something I have regularly and what might need to be a special treat. Knowing that will definitely be part of sustainable eating for me.

I did read the why we eat too much book above but for me it would be too restrictive following the advice strictly. I have used it as a guide towards what sort of things it would be better to eat more of and what less though

This ‘not a diet’ diet which worked?

They clearly call it a diet. You lost weight on it.

This diet has worked for you

The only way I have lost weight as I have got older is having the accountability of a weigh in, otherwise I yo-yo, good during the week, then it goes to pot at weekends. So yes I’m back at SW, lockdown WFH and I’m heavier than I want to be. However I don’t eat processed food, I only cook from scratch, I don’t buy any of their chocolate bars, I still use Olive Oil and eat the occasional advocado, just not as much. I don’t add sugar or sugar substitutes and I don’t eat as much as you want pasta/or too many carbs but a small sensible portion so really quite a well balanced diet. Weigh in days are Mondays so I’m careful over the weekends. I’ve eaten out twice this week, being able to view the menu on line before helps make better choices. It’s hard as you get older, especially if you’ve never really needed to worry and cutting down a bit and a few runs a week would let you eat what you like.

I have deep seated issues with food and need therapy to address them but nothing is available on the NHS (I have a healthy BMI so don't qualify) and I can't afford private therapy.

Is this something you could look into OP? It's your mind that needs to change.

Have you heard about Intuitive Eating? It sounds amazing and I would love to follow it but just can't manage it by myself- i need a therapist but it might work for you.

Sadly the only thing that keeps me on track long term in the absence of therapy is calorie counting and weekly weigh ins at SW for accountability. It is very rigid but stops me piling on weight. It obviously doesn't address my underlying issues.

I started calorie counting. I was 14st 5 now 13st 4 in 6 weeks. Work out your calories based on your numbers. I can have 1587 but that's with a deficit already take. Into account. So 1887 would keep me at at the same weight. Meal plan as I find I go of track if I have to start cooking/or snack on rubbish.

Could you go into the office?

I finish so much easier to still to 3 meals a a day bin the office.

I take a porridge sachet for breakfast at 9am, fruit for lunch at 12-1 and a homemade meal for tea at 5-6. Total 1500 cals.

When wfh i snack soooo much more.

@Quincythequince no, I think you'll find I said "you're not a very nice person are you?" Because you were being extremely condescending and not very nice, then you repeatedly called me silly and stupid.
I'm bored now. You haven't changed my opinion. You can give information without the patronising attitude.

Diet just means the food you normally eat. Everyone has a diet.

The diet you have been on (see above) has not been suitable for your needs. It has caused too much weight gain. So it requires adjusting unless you want to keep putting weight on and potentially causing the health problems associated with that.

You need to utilise some of that energy you have stored up in your body fat. So you don't need to eat as many calories as some of your calories can come from your fat reserves. You do need good nutrition.

I would recommend logging what you eat and logging your exercise. Work out calories requirements and ensure you eat to a deficit. Easily done with apps and Fitness trackers. Failing that, just reduce your portions of main meals (maybe halve), add in more salad / green veg to fill the rest of the plate. Don't snack. Limit alcohol. Tweak things if you plateau. Exercise, even if you only up your walking. It helps your whole body just work better.

Slimming world , it does work and you won't be starving! Ive tried every diet. !

And you can't go back to the diet that caused all the problems in the first place.(That is the one you are considering 'normal). You need a new way if eating. Plus you will have to adjust as you go along as your needs will change as you get lighter.

You also asserted that what I was saying was ‘rubbish’

My response was appropriate.

I am not trying to change your opinion, don’t give a crap what you eat. It’s a fool that sticks to an opinion when there is clear evidence to the contrary. If that how you make decisions in life; anecdote.

Crack on, but when you boldly call others statements ‘rubbish’ and say ‘you’re not very nice are you’ (what are you, 4?), in the adult world, that will elicit a response!

DH lost 10 stone over the last 2 years and is keeping it off. I'm really proud of him and wish I could do the same!
He sticks to a routine, eats healthily and walks 10,000 steps a day.
One thing he changed is sleep. He used to stay up late gaming and snacking. Now he goes to bed at 10 every night and wakes up at 6.30 to do exercise and eat his egg white and frozen veg omelette.

Diets work as long as when you ‘stop’ the diet, you don’t go back to your old eating patterns; you have to make sustainable changes.

I’ve been losing on 1500 calories and I’ve trained myself to not have breakfast; I have a banana or a cereal bar around 10/11 and that’s it until lunch. Then I can basically have a normal lunch and dinner, a snack and often a little treat like a malteser bunny for pud. I’m not hungry and don’t find it horribly restrictive.

@Jobchangeadvice

Could you go into the office?

I finish so much easier to still to 3 meals a a day bin the office.

I take a porridge sachet for breakfast at 9am, fruit for lunch at 12-1 and a homemade meal for tea at 5-6. Total 1500 cals.

When wfh i snack soooo much more.

*I find it so much easier to stick to 3 meals a day in the office.

Idk what happened there, sorry.

@Quincythequince

You also asserted that what I was saying was ‘rubbish’

My response was appropriate.

I am not trying to change your opinion, don’t give a crap what you eat. It’s a fool that sticks to an opinion when there is clear evidence to the contrary. If that how you make decisions in life; anecdote.

Crack on, but when you boldly call others statements ‘rubbish’ and say ‘you’re not very nice are you’ (what are you, 4?), in the adult world, that will elicit a response!

"Rubbish" isn't a personal insult, calling someone stupid and silly, oh and now a fool is. Calling people silly, what are you 3? I know people who have tried the diets you claim work, and every one of them is heavier now (by a significant amount) than they were before. It's a fool that started "debates" and throws "facts" at someone who never asked for them.

I refer you to previously mentioned, publicly available evidence in the Lancet, BMJ, Diabetes medicine to name a few!

If you don’t manage your weight in the long run - NO diet wil work, not even yours.

Go away and educate yourself.

And you’re on a public forum. You can expect people respond to what you type, otherwise why are you here?

And if your way of eating is so good, why do you need to diet at all eh?

What is the hangup on the word diet? Everything is a diet, whether you want to call it by a fancy name / brand doesn't matter. Diets work and to claim otherwise is simply ridiculous. They work because all diets put you in a calorie deficit which makes you lose weight. The part that doesn't work is the part where you stick to it, change your lifestyle and keep it off. But the diet itself works.

Calorie counting is good because it makes you aware of what you are putting in your body. It teaches you about healthy eating and points out the foods you may be consuming that are much higher in calorie than you may have thought. Weightwatchers is similar but I would still prefer simple calorie counting.

Keto, fasting, Atkins, whatever diets are crap because no one wants to live like that forever and you won't be any wiser than you were before. That's why they don't work.

Diets work if the result of your diet is a lifestyle change.

I’d get back on your running if I were you @MoirasWigStand I’ve found it really useful in terms of weight maintenance, because a couple of long runs a week burns enough calories to mop up any over eating. But it also helps with weight loss if you gets the runs in and avoid and snacking / over-eating for about 6 months, I bet you’d be down a couple of stone without eating restrictively. Give you we’re already a runner, I bet you can build it back up reasonably quickly. I’ve also got a cheap elliptical which I use on days I really can’t get out for a run. It really makes so much difference to how I feel and look, and does keep the weight off.

Look for a local women’s running club? They are some great ones out there that are just supportive and not Uber competitive with a complete mix of ages - it helps me get out at the weekends when I might avoid it!