AIBU to know diets don’t work but also need to lose 3-4 stone

[MoirasWigStand]

I’m the fattest I’ve ever been. 5’6” and weigh 14st 11. There is a reason, I had health issues last year which meant no exercise (even walking) for almost a year, as well as a period of time on steroids (which made me pile on weight).

I really, really, need to lose it now. I can exercise (although my efforts are pretty pathetic so far!). I started calorie counting and lost 6lbs in January, but it’s gone back on after a few stress do l weeks.

And I found it so hard. 1500 calories is so little food 😂. I clearly have issues with stress eating and bingeing. Also when ‘bored’ at home when wfh.

I need a massive kick up the arse. I know diets don’t work, I’ve read those books. But I really need to lose some weight, I’m disgusted in myself.

newrunner it’s the return to old eating habits which causes the gain.

Not the diet failing after the fact.

Ah ok.

Should add my heart attack was the kind caused by an infection, not blocked artery type.

@Quincythequince rubbish. Drastically cutting calories is bad for your health in the long term.

You should ask to see a GP w SI in obesity OP.

You may also, under the circumstances, be recommended for the Saxenda or WeGovy too. The data is very good.

But again, longer term changes are needed here once the weight is off.

[quote Thatsplentyjack]@Quincythequince rubbish. Drastically cutting calories is bad for your health in the long term.[/quote]
No it’s not!

There is no evidence for this.

Please show me the data, when compared with normal ‘daily -500kcal’ diets’ that nutritionally complete MRP diets are worse.

You can’t, because there is none.

Have made mention of many studies on this thread, which you should take a look at.

I am your height and 11 stone, which is still heavier than I want to be. Honestly 1500 calories is a fair amount of food.

@Leftleg

You don't need to go as low as 1500. Try 1800 calories to start with and 10,000 steps per day, you should still lose and it will be easier to stick to.

This is very very sensible.

I think I’m generally furious with my body. It feels like it totally let me down. I was doing well. I wasn’t skinny but I was healthy. I used to be able by I run half marathons. And then an infection cocked up my heart, floored me for a year at and led to steroids an weight gain.

Of course I’ve contributed to to too. It I was so miserable and I just ate my feelings.

My GP said my cholesterol was high recently and just sent me a link for low fat diet tips. No recognition of how I’ve got here from lack of exercise and medication.

Have made mention of many studies on this thread, which you should take a look at.

🤣 I'm OK thanks. I'll stick to losing weight eating normal food.

My view is that restricting calories works (and I think probably a lot of those other diets work by restricting calories in the end) but sticking to restricted calories is difficult and things like stress and boredom can set you off mindlessly eating without thinking.
I eat when I get bored so like to try and distract myself with things like wordle and mumsnet. I think exercise helps, but maybe more for motivation and feeling healthy?

@Thatsplentyjack

Have made mention of many studies on this thread, which you should take a look at.

🤣 I'm OK thanks. I'll stick to losing weight eating normal food.

Fair enough, you do that.

But you’re statements about weight loss are inaccurate and you have no business as presenting them as fact, when there is substantial evidence to the contrary.

@Stripey3000

Switching to a plant based diet (even for a % of the week) and cutting out alcohol are quite easy wins. Good luck. You've got this! X

This is excellent advice. I lost 2 stone a year ago on a plant based diet and have kept it off. Never hungry and feel so well too. I'm 52 and its taken at least 10 years off me in every respect.

"Diets" don't work, but consistently cutting calories does. That's why IF works, why Keto works - it's sustained rather than short term.

Slimmer people are not blessed with special metabolisms - they eat less or move more (other than those few with genuine medical issues)
1500 calories isn't a tiny amount at all - you can easily make decent meals at 400 calls without resorting to depressing salads or plain fish and broccoli! Get a calorie tracker app and log everything, it's the mayo/butter/crisps/sneaky biscuits that add up.

This is pretty much how I was after dc2. I managed to get down to 12st before I fell pregnant with dc3. (was aiming for 11 but struggled in the Jan-mar lockdown)

I had to do it by structuring my meals to certain times of the day and going to bed at a decent time! Breakfast was anything I fancied - but not loads, lunch was a shake at 12. Low fat chocolate bar for snack at 2. Dinner (low fat microwave meal) at 4:30 before collecting the kids from childcare (working from home). Then a low fat hot chocolate in the evening to send away those cravings and bed straight after the hot chocolate.

Dinner seems early but my dh works late so I'm on my own in the evenings doing the kids dinner/bath/bed. It's 9 before I sit down! And having already eaten it stops me snacking on their leftovers!

It was really tough some times but I needed the limit on my food, I couldn't cook myself dinner as I'd cook too much, so I needed the portion size limited by the shake and microwave meal. And a small chocolate bar, rather than x amount of chocolate buttons.

*Fair enough, you do that.

But you’re statements about weight loss are inaccurate and you have no business as presenting them as fact, when there is substantial evidence to the contrary.*

There is plenty of evidence that drastically restricting calories doesn't work long term, especially for people who have disordered eating. Also, ime cutting calories to the extreme can cause disordered eating, but I'll tell my 14 year-old bulimic self that you and your evidence says different.

Show me this evidence please thatsplentyjack

I’m waiting.

Your opinion isn’t valid here anyway, we are talking evidence not what your experience says.

Everyone’s experience is different which is why we look to the science.

Again, There is no evidence that the diets as I’ve described above, are worse than standard dieting

And stop with the whataboutery re bulimia FGS. You know perfectly well we aren’t talking about bulimic children.

66% adults in the UK are overweight or obese.

And I’m case you sim know how diets work with MRPs, you don’t drastically restrict the calories long-term.

That’s not how it works

You could of course look up all the studies mentioned above, but why bother when you can blind me with your ‘Google degree’ in science.

In case you didn’t know that should have said.

1500 cals can equate to a lot of food, you don’t need to go hungry you just need to eat healthily. Exercise helps to hit a calorie deficit more quickly but it’s not essential for weight loss as you can achieve a defect without it. I’d recommend using the app MyFitnessPal to track what you’re eating, it really helps with keeping on track and helps change your mindset too.
Try bulking out your meals and snacks with as many vegetables as possible. An omelette with peppers, spinach, mushrooms, tomatoes and Tabasco sauce is a go-yo lunch for me for example, filling and low calorie. For breakfast, porridge or overnight oats with fruit. For dinner, fill your plate with at least 1/3 green veg before adding carbs. Avoid processed foods as much as possible. Drink a lot of water. Think about where your calories come from (again MyFitnessPal helps) and reduce where possible - sugary drinks, smoothies, sauces, alcohol, etc.
Good luck!

Something like 95% of attempts to give up cigarettes fail. Does this mean that giving up cigarettes is impossible? No. It just means it's hard. Many people who eventually do quit for good will have tried multiple times.

It's the same for dieting. It is hard, yes, but it's completely possible.

For me a big thing was recognising that I ate to 'reward myself' and finding other non-food rewards.

I relate to a lot of what you've said. I have a fussy child and I've lost my love of cooking. Without chocolate/snacks/takeaways I eat fine.
I'm doing slimming world because it makes me eat healthily. If I calorie count I just use my calories on chocolate. I'm the same height as you and when I started as 14st 9. I'm now 13st 7.

@MoirasWigStand I think it's important to start making changes slowly, remember it's not a race and there isn't a quick fix. Instead of seeing this process as a diet, think of it as a lifestyle change.
I know personally, if I have the notion that I'm on a diet, it's almost like telling myself don't eat x,y and z until this weight, and then you can go back to 'normal'.

I am an emotional eater (unfortunately developed this about 6 years ago), and binge eating. It takes a lot of mind and body work to break the cycle. In the past, I've lost 4 stones (each time after dcs), but I've had to make sure my head is in the right place.

Restricting myself from foods doesn't work, because eventually the cravings win, but because I've held back for so long, it means huge binge.

I tend to make small changes, so for instance when I think I would like to eat something (between meals), instead of reaching for the food, have a glass of water. Usually, the 'hunger' has subsided (as it wasn't actual hunger iyswim).

Reducing portion sizes is something else you can incorporate slowly, and eventually you'll find you don't need to eat as much to feel satisfied.

With emotional and binge eating, the food is supposed to fill a void (it really doesn't), so it's important to try and find something else that you enjoy that helps you.

Hope that helps, I'm currently on another weight loss journey, because after losing weight, we purchased a house and moved, and that unfortunately meant me going backwards and gaining weight again.

I also spoke to my GP about binge eating, and she did give me some useful information and suggested I do that this seriously with regards to mental health.

OP I feel your pain. I was always active and a healthy weight and then had some major health issues a decade ago and shot up to 93 kilos. When I was discharged from hospital appointments I lost 17 kilos over 8 months by doing boot camp 4 times a week and exercising.

2 babies and covid and some more medical problems later I was back up at 85 in Jan and realised it was time for a drastic change. I am much more ready than before to tackle the underlying issues I have with food and change my thinking around how I eat and why. I’m exercising more and using my fitness pal. Was on 1650 calories but now it’s recommending 1510 as I’ve lost 8 kilos. I think I will keep it off as I’m prepared to change how I eat in the long term. Still a ways to go for me. I let myself have a night off every two or three weeks and eat what I want but thus far is going well. You do have to be Radically honest with yourself though. Good luck xx

So you don't want to diet as it doesn't work, don't want to give up alcohol because you enjoy it so.....you want us to suggest a way for you to lose 4 stone by continuing to do exactly what you're doing now?

I think most people are saying the same thing- for it to work long term it needs to be sustainable. So gradual might be the way to go. I started with the same thing for breakfast every day, and focused on building a set of meals made from scratch that were healthy- on a scale, so some are super healthy, some have a ton of cheese and some are full on calorific deliciousness but I have an idea of that scale in my head. And then once I felt the dinner side of things was embedded in my daily routine and I knew all the recipes and meal planning got easier I focussed on lunches. So now I have a list of lunches- some are quick easy sandwiches for weeks I know I'm busy or under pressure, most are baked potato, burger and sweet potato fries, veg stir fry, veg fried rice etc. and I've gone back and done breakfast now. I'm weight training so focussing more on protein. And I find that when the weight creeps up I just start weighing carbs again (the pasta and rice are usually where I run amok) but one thing at a time. I also went through a Coke addiction but I wouldn't tackle the coke and the food at the same time. But it's been very gradual and I have all the tools there. Sometimes like the run up to Christmas or holidays I'll eat really lavishly for convenience or fun and I just make sure to focus more for the weeks after. It's taken time to get here- a few years- but I've just started back focussing a year after my ds was born and a house move and have found it so much easier to get back into the swing of things now that I know what I'm doing the issue has mainly been focus if that makes sense.