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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I shouldn't have to pay to see my mum

352 replies

MrsBertBibby · 22/02/2022 19:15

Just that. "Freedom" is no such thing for care home residents. Imprisoned and deprived of family and now, if we want to visit, we must shell out £20 for a test.

Is it unreasonable to call this government absolute sick psychopaths?

OP posts:
missmoon · 22/02/2022 23:22

The government pay some of the most reasonable benefits in the world

No, they don’t. We have the lowest benefits among the OECD (38 wealthiest) countries. See here:

data.oecd.org/benwage/benefits-in-unemployment-share-of-previous-income.htm

Monopolyiscrap · 22/02/2022 23:22

@Cameleongirl I have no idea about the benefits in China and Russia. In the US it depends on states.
But we are a rich country. And yes compared to the G7 we have much lower welfare benefits and much lower state pensions.

missmoon · 22/02/2022 23:23

Cross-posted @Monopolyiscrap!

BogRollBOGOF · 22/02/2022 23:24

Testing is no guarentee of safety anyway. LFTs may not show positive until it's too late. There's also no testing for the myriad of other common infections that can be serious or fatal to vulnerable people.

Testing is expensive to the state and not particularly effective anyway. Society needs to drop the additional risk assessments that distinguishes Covid from any other ailment and it should be reserved for medical care needs only.

If my diary had filled up differently, I could easily have spread Covid with a clear concience on Christmas Day, hours before the scratchy throat, and 12+ hours before a faint positive. That was the last of one type of test, and out of curiosity, I opened the box of the new type and that tested negative. I could easily have been given false reassurence if I'd only used test 2 and gone to visit family that day.

Cameleongirl · 22/02/2022 23:28

@missmoon Unemployment benefits only last for 26 weeks here in the US, though. Plus there's no such thing as Child Allowance, for example. It literally doesn't exist.

So although the US looks more generous on that graph, I doubt it is over the course of someone's lifetime.

Bumpy23 · 22/02/2022 23:28

@Primrosecottage I think you're right!

Monopolyiscrap · 22/02/2022 23:28

@missmoon your links are far better than my comment!

@BogRollBOGOF there are no guarantees in life. It does not mean we abandon all ways to protect vulnerable people.

Monopolyiscrap · 22/02/2022 23:30

@Cameleongirl for a lot of people in the UK unemployment benefits only last for 26 weeks. It is only those with no other access to money e.g. savings or a partner, who get it beyond then.

TonksInPurple · 22/02/2022 23:31

We were in Portugal in October you could buy LFTs for €1 so I’m sure pound shop will have them soon.

jytdtysrht · 22/02/2022 23:32

I think that since it is a nursing home requirement, that they should cover the cost and do the 15 min tests at the door when you get there. They should put the cost onto the nursing home fees. It really is horrible to think that people will struggle to pay the cost of visiting elderly relatives.

Justkeeppedaling · 22/02/2022 23:36

@jytdtysrht

I think that since it is a nursing home requirement, that they should cover the cost and do the 15 min tests at the door when you get there. They should put the cost onto the nursing home fees. It really is horrible to think that people will struggle to pay the cost of visiting elderly relatives.

For the amount a nursing home costs, I'd like to think they could supply family visitors with a few free tests each week. Particularly as they are making up their own rules.

Really18 · 22/02/2022 23:39

We haven't been able to see my nan since November. The home has had covid since then. She doesnt have covid but other residents do. The residents can't mix. They aren't having any visitors or entertainment. She is living worse than a prison. She has no idea who we are anymore.

BurscoughBooths · 22/02/2022 23:41

[quote missmoon]The government pay some of the most reasonable benefits in the world

No, they don’t. We have the lowest benefits among the OECD (38 wealthiest) countries. See here:

data.oecd.org/benwage/benefits-in-unemployment-share-of-previous-income.htm[/quote]
From the same source:
data.oecd.org/benwage/adequacy-of-minimum-income-benefits.htm#indicator-chart

don’t these charts show that the UK benefits system doesn’t do well when compared to previous income, but it is one of the highest paying systems in terms of median disposable income?

Whatelsecouldibecalled · 22/02/2022 23:41

Off topic...are the staff still testing then? Twice weekly? Or are they having to pay to test? Or are they not testing but forcing families to? What's the situation? Will they isolate if they have flu like symptoms or continue to work as the work is poorly paid and most likely can't afford time off thus killing your granny that way?

vodkaredbullgirl · 22/02/2022 23:45

We are still having to do lfts every shift we work. They stopped doing PCR.

Monopolyiscrap · 22/02/2022 23:48

@BurscoughBooths that applies to families with 2 dependent children, or single people with no children.
So people in specific circumstances.
It feels like playing with statistics.

Nameisjustaname · 22/02/2022 23:48

Anyone else see on JETTV that there were 4 or 5 aeroplanes a DAY from China delivering tests.
No passengers just tests. I was Shock

hamsterchump · 23/02/2022 00:01

@Whatelsecouldibecalled

Off topic...are the staff still testing then? Twice weekly? Or are they having to pay to test? Or are they not testing but forcing families to? What's the situation? Will they isolate if they have flu like symptoms or continue to work as the work is poorly paid and most likely can't afford time off thus killing your granny that way?
Hopefully they still come into work, care is in complete crisis at the moment and if staff members don't come in it may not be possible to replace them. Having no staff in the care home with granny will be a lot more likely to kill her a lot quicker than Covid might.

I would suggest there aren't that many saints about who will choose to self isolate now that they don't have to when they only get statutory sick pay (a princely £96.35 a week) and nothing until the fourth day!

hamsterchump · 23/02/2022 00:08

@Really18

We haven't been able to see my nan since November. The home has had covid since then. She doesnt have covid but other residents do. The residents can't mix. They aren't having any visitors or entertainment. She is living worse than a prison. She has no idea who we are anymore.
It's disgusting, they're torturing people who are at their most vulnerable. Even in prisons it would be extreme to be placed in solitary confinement for years. And all in the name of "protection".

I wonder whether it's very much easier for care home managers and owners not to have pesky, nosy visitors poking about who might notice neglect and poor conditions and treatment.

Not to mention that it clearly serves their back pockets to keep self funding residents especially alive as long as possible in any condition.

MintJulia · 23/02/2022 00:11

You aren't paying to see your mum, you're paying to protect her and other residents from a potentially dangerous illness.

My ds' school still expects him to test twice a week, to protect the school and help it to stay open. I'm a single mum but I accept the importance keeping classes covid free.

2YearsOfWastedTime · 23/02/2022 00:50

You are deluded @gogohm

EmmaMaya · 23/02/2022 01:41

Agree op and also if they had not thrown so much money to friends (also at tax payer expense) throughout pandemic perhaps they could be distributed free for a longer period.

LimeJellyforBrains · 23/02/2022 01:56

It's not just care homes. Millions of elderly people have to have carers, home helps/cleaners and meals-on-wheels delivery people coming into their homes. So that can be up to four people per day, seven days per week (plus any number of visits from family). Plus occasional doctors, district nurses, chiropodists, hairdressers, etc, even opticians these days. All these people going in and out of all these same houses!

Currently all carers etc are testing and, hopefully, isolating if necessary, and I'm sure all other healthcare staff are too.

I am a home help via a charity, and am currently obliged to test before going into a client's home. This can range from 1-3 tests per week depending on how many days we work. I get paid just over NMW, should I pay to do my job? Should all the other low-paid carers going in and out of all these vulnerable people's homes have to pay for multiple tests per week? Should the charity I work for pay for the tests? (I know they can't/won't). If the client has to foot the cost, how much would that add up to for quite a typical scenario of say, a carer two or three times per day (different carer each time), plus a home help once or twice per week? Attendance Allowance and a pension only stretches so far.

Or should we all just stop testing, due to the cost?

Will all low-paid, zero-hours carers, home helps and other healthcare workers isolate if they don't have to? No work, no pay.

I'm finding this all very worrying actually. Without testing and isolation, I think cases and deaths among the elderly at home will rise, as will cases among those of us having to visit the elderly at home for our work. It's not a typical workplace scenario, you won't have a clue where or when you caught it, so without testing and isolation there'll be little chance of stopping any spread once it starts.

So some people will be able to afford to pay for tests (and to have the luxury of choice of whether to take time off work to isolate, or not), and other people won't be able to afford to do either? Does that sound fair? And the elderly and the poorly paid will be most at risk. Sounds like yet more callous social engineering to me Hmm.

Desiredeffect · 23/02/2022 02:05

As long as care home staff don't need to pay that's all I care about.

Kinsters · 23/02/2022 02:27

We don't get free tests where I live (Malaysia). I think lower income people get some LFTs for free and if there's reason for you to need a PCR then that's free.

I don't think the government can carry on providing free LFTs. Perhaps care homes should provide them for visitors but the cost will ultimately be passed on in care fees.

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