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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

3 year old saying Bog

260 replies

Shurdle · 22/02/2022 07:23

Got pulled aside by nursery last week to say DS was calling the toilet “the bog”. I know in the UK some words are more acceptable than in other parts but where we are “bog” is considered crude slang. So obviously I told nursery I didn’t know where he’d got that from as we don’t say it but I’d ensure he knows the word is toilet.
On Friday he spent the day with my parents and came home calling the toilet the bog again. I messaged my mum to ask if she knew where he was getting it from and she said she had been saying it to him as it was easier than toilet which he was struggling to say. I told her nursery wasn’t happy and I didn’t like it either so could she stop. She laughed and said I was being precious but agreed she would continue teaching “toilet”.

He was with my parents yesterday afternoon and whilst in the bath he pointed to the toilet and said “that’s a shithouse”. Now I know my father says this but I don’t believe he would tell DS to say this so I reckon my mum has told him that I was complaining about the bog word and my father has said something like “call it the shithouse then” as a joke and DS has overheard??

Anyway my aibu - I rely on my parents heavily for childcare which they insist on doing for free. Do I just let it go rather than causing a scene bringing it up again??

YABU - confront them about saying bad words in front of DS
YANBU - let it go, it’s not worth the fallout.

OP posts:
Bancha · 22/02/2022 12:04

@girlmom21

My DD says fart though. I never thought there was anything wrong with it! She would panic every time she farted thinking she’d poo’d and she hates pooing, so now she says “just a fart!”, which is hilarious.

That's so cute 😂 my 2 year old says "I just pardoned" which I love 😂

@girlmom21 that’s so sweet, I love it!
Bancha · 22/02/2022 12:06

Am I the only one cringing in horror at the word "toilet"?

This is a joke, surely?!

ThatsNotMyGolem · 22/02/2022 12:07

Sorry but the thought of a 3-year-old calling the toilet the bog is pretty funny Grin

ChargingBuck · 22/02/2022 12:08

@Bancha

Am I the only one cringing in horror at the word "toilet"?

This is a joke, surely?!

Not really - I find the word revolting. Would much rather hear someone call it a bog :)
campion · 22/02/2022 12:11

You've had some varied replies about loo already @Migrainesbythedozen but I was reminded of this poem:

How To Get On In Society by John Betjeman

'Phone for the fish knives, Norman
As cook is a little unnerved;
You kiddies have crumpled the serviettes
And I must have things daintily served.

Are the requisites all in the toilet?
The frills round the cutlets can wait
Till the girl has replenished the cruets
And switched on the logs in the grate.

It's ever so close in the lounge dear,
But the vestibule's comfy for tea
And Howard is riding on horseback
So do come and take some with me

Now here is a fork for your pastries
And do use the couch for your feet;
I know that I wanted to ask you-
Is trifle sufficient for sweet?

Milk and then just as it comes dear?
I'm afraid the preserve's full of stones;
Beg pardon, I'm soiling the doileys
With afternoon tea-cakes and scones'

Ukholidaysaregreat · 22/02/2022 12:17

Oakyleafy your post about KaKar has really made me giggle! I hear your KaKar and I raise you BobBar. This is a South Yorkshire term I feel and I am single handly trying to bring it back into common parlance. 💩💩💩

Rosebel · 22/02/2022 12:22

I don't like bog either, although obviously better than shit house. Surely at 3 he can say toilet or loo.
I'm surprised nursery are complaining about bog as it's not nice but hardly the worst word in the world. What on Earth will they do if he says shit house?

oakleaffy · 22/02/2022 12:22

@Ukholidaysaregreat

Oakyleafy your post about KaKar has really made me giggle! I hear your KaKar and I raise you BobBar. This is a South Yorkshire term I feel and I am single handly trying to bring it back into common parlance. 💩💩💩
Haha! The person who said it ( Loudly) was most definitely from London. I have a Yorkshire friend ( Born Bradford) and will ask him if he’s heard it.

I did call knickers “Kax” ( Cacks?) as a younger person years ago-
Maybe this has it’s roots in “Ka Kar”?
We need a linguist😂

oakleaffy · 22/02/2022 12:23

@Ukholidaysaregreat

BobBar!
I mis- read.

Ill ask Yorkshireman about BobBar😂😂

oakleaffy · 22/02/2022 12:31

@Ukholidaysaregreat

Bobar!!

I googled.

I love it!
I think I’ll borrow it..
I “Poo pick” up after Whippet, so “ Bobar” pick sounds much better.

Ukholidaysaregreat · 22/02/2022 12:34

Oakleaffy! Hahaha! Brilliant! Me and you will bring it back!

frostedfruit · 22/02/2022 12:36

GrinGrinGrin

GilesRupert · 22/02/2022 12:48

Fart? A swear word? Dear lord.

AryaStarkWolf · 22/02/2022 12:52

I'd leave it go for now, especially if you think the Shithouse thing was unintentional but I would bring it up if it happened again, like someone else said, tell them they're getting their grandson in trouble

Notimeforaname · 22/02/2022 12:56

See, fart to me sounds like swearing!

Can't stop laughing. 🤣🤣 Thanks for this

Choppingonions · 22/02/2022 13:06

It's hilarious and I like the sound of your parents. But realistically unless you're going to home ed and so on, he needs to fit in to some extent with society and this is the wrong childcare for him if it's going to keep getting him in the shit, as it were.

Ludo19 · 22/02/2022 13:08

@merrymelodies I'm with you 😄

Gizacluethen · 22/02/2022 13:09

I think I'd send them a message saying you do appreciate them looking after him and they may find it funny getting him to say bog and shithouse but that it's their grandson that's getting told off at nursery for it, not you. It's not about you vs them, they're teaching him to do something that's causing him to be told off when he should be enjoying himself.

AncientWhitedogpoop · 22/02/2022 13:14

Showing my age now, but when I was at school the "Boglin" toys were popular. Those rubbery ugly puppet things.
On the last day of term you could bring in a toy and someone brought in a Boglin. I said to my "friend" 'I always wanted a Boglin!' And she ran up to the teacher to say "Miss! Ancient just said "Bog"! And the teacher told me off! For that reason I don't say it as it still feels naughty Blush

Cognoscenti · 22/02/2022 13:15

I'm surprised you're in Yorkshire OP, I thought bog was a pretty standard term for it here. 🙈 Maybe it's just my area of Yorkshire!
DP calls it bog, I call it loo, I wouldn't mind which our kids chose, to be honest. If nursery don't like it though, it would probably be best to ask your parents not to use "bog" around your son.

AncientWhitedogpoop · 22/02/2022 13:17

Maybe we should bring back the term "WC" Grin

nearlyspringyay · 22/02/2022 13:22

Mil says I need to go a wee. I'd prefer bog tbh.

GTAlogic · 22/02/2022 13:24

I call it bog and loo as well (at home, not at work) and would probably struggle to hide my snort with laughter at a young child calling it a shithouse if I heard it at school. I certainly wouldn't tell a child off for saying they needed the bog; at the most I'd just say, "You mean you need the toilet? Yes, of course you can go."

Yabu op. They're only words.

crisplovingmummy · 22/02/2022 13:29

No 😂

Cocomarine · 22/02/2022 13:30

I’m laughing at the idea a 3yo can’t say “toilet” - when they can manage, “shithouse” 🤣

There’s definitely polite euphemistic slang and crude slang - and it varies by region.
For me, loo is the first and bog is the latter.
Like poo & wee vs shit & piss.

So many laughing at OP saying “fart” sounds like swearing to her, but where I am, fart is crude and trump is the “polite” term of choice.

I wouldn’t want my child saying bog, and I’d happily tell my parents that - free childcare or not. They’d listen, too. And we’d ALL roar with laughter if I popped in and said, “dad you are BUSTED for that shithouse comment!”