Page 2 | Upset with piano teacher at school

RincewindsHat · 21/02/2022 15:07

It sounds like you're taking the teacher's comments rather personally. It's her job as a professional to advise her clients/pupils/whatever on how they're going to make the best progress, which she has done. She hinted to you that your child needed to be able to practice at home, you ignored the hint and so she had no choice but to clearly point out the importance of having a piano at home to practice on (because you don't have one and declined to communicate that you were getting one) and now you're upset because the teacher is doing the responsible thing in trying to ensure that your child a) has fun and b) actually makes progress?

You're being rather unreasonable here.

AnotherExpatKiwi · 21/02/2022 15:08

@CarolinaStabril

She’s also removed me from the guitar WhatsApp group where she posts the homework for parents (my daughter originally started on guitar which is why I was invited), I just feel it’s all a bit personal

I doubt it’s personal. You’ve been removed from the group because your daughter doesn’t learn guitar.

Like others here I’m an instrumental teacher and it is incredibly frustrating for both the student and the teacher if nothing is done outside of lessons. It really is like Groundhog Day. It’s also frustrating teaching a child whose interests are another instrument not the one they’re learning!

At year 1 your DD is still very young so there is ample time to choose. I’d recommend go with guitar, group lessons, she can practise at home, all good. Move to piano later if she still shows an interest and you have a decent instrument for her to play on.

FrugralMcDougal · 21/02/2022 15:09

Can I be really honest? Music lessons in school are ridiculously disruptive. I work in a classroom as a volunteer and would every week without fail have to try to explain to a child who has missed the first part of the maths lesson what we worked through and then she didn't have enough time to practise that work before the lesson was over. Lessons are really short in school.

I think music lessons need to be outside of school and one to one for the best experience. I had this myself as a child.

viques · 21/02/2022 15:11

Why did she give up the guitar? Did she have a guitar to practise at home with? If she has given it up once why does she want to start it again?

Billybagpuss · 21/02/2022 15:12

It really is like Groundhog Day

It really is I agree

lunar1 · 21/02/2022 15:13

What children learn in a lesson is just a fraction of what's needed. It's got to come from the child, they take away the teachers input and have to play it over and over so when they go back for the next lesson they can make corrections and progress.

There is no way she could do this without an instrument at home.

MaizeAmaze · 21/02/2022 15:13

I think you should stop school music lesson, source an instrument, and then look at external lessons.
We have had amazing (individual) lessons at primary, and then very disappointing group lessons at secondary. So we are now doing externally sourced lessons in place of the heavily subsidised school ones. You need to find a teacher you are happy with, and it sounds like the relationship has broken down between you and the school teacher, so you would be best looking elsewhere.

Original poster

CarolinaStabril · 21/02/2022 15:14

@MangshorJhol

So she wants to learn guitar. She told the teacher that. She has no opportunity to practice piano. You were on the guitar group because she was learning guitar and now you are not because she isn’t.

Then given her lack of progress and lack of instrument and her own interest in the guitar the teacher has asked that she switch?

Is that correct? Unless there is a huge drip feed I don’t see what the teacher has done wrong.

I don’t think the teacher has done anything wrong and I will have a keyboard by next week for her to practise on. I just feel it should be my decision (and my daughters) what instrument I sign up for, not the teacher trying to talk me out of my decision

OP posts:

arethereanyleftatall · 21/02/2022 15:15

I do think it's personal. I think it's because she doesn't like you.
It sounds like your dd is getting a private lesson for the cost of a group one, so she probably is pissed off and trying to switch her - that's not your problem though.

Original poster

CarolinaStabril · 21/02/2022 15:15

@FrugralMcDougal

Can I be really honest? Music lessons in school are ridiculously disruptive. I work in a classroom as a volunteer and would every week without fail have to try to explain to a child who has missed the first part of the maths lesson what we worked through and then she didn't have enough time to practise that work before the lesson was over. Lessons are really short in school.

I think music lessons need to be outside of school and one to one for the best experience. I had this myself as a child.

Music lessons are important and should take place both in and out of the school day

OP posts:

Comefromaway · 21/02/2022 15:15

As someone who got to Grade 8 and has a music degree I will go against the grain here. I had piano lessons and did exams for several years before I had a piano at home. Dh (who ended up at a conservatoire spent ages saving up for a piano too before he had one at home. However we were both allowed to practice at school.

It isn't unreasonable for a child to have piano lessons for a term or so to make sure before going to the major expense of buying an instrument. Progress will be slow and it isn't ideal but its not impossible.

I agree the OP does now need to buy a piano whether acoustic or hammer action digital, but the teacher shouldn;t be trying to push her towards a different instrument just for convenience.

Smartiepants79 · 21/02/2022 15:16

She is trying to prevent you from wasting your money.
All she sees is a pretty young child with no way of practicing (even after several months!) and apparently more interest in a different instrument.
Without the keyboard at home it is an utter waste of time and money ( your money).

sadandcrazy · 21/02/2022 15:17

Last term could mean anytime from September to December. That is a long time to not have any practice. I see her point.

HideousKinky · 21/02/2022 15:18

Why did you start piano lessons before having an instrument to practise on at home?

Which would your daughter prefer to learn, piano or guitar? My 3 DDs all learnt instruments and I would say it is always better to go with the child's enthusiasm because then they will be motivated and enjoy the lessons

Original poster

CarolinaStabril · 21/02/2022 15:18

@arethereanyleftatall

I do think it's personal. I think it's because she doesn't like you. It sounds like your dd is getting a private lesson for the cost of a group one, so she probably is pissed off and trying to switch her - that's not your problem though.

I agree

OP posts:

Nelliephant1 · 21/02/2022 15:19

Teacher is right. What does your daughter want

Sally872 · 21/02/2022 15:22

Yabu.

Teacher gave advice partially based on what your dd said and the fact she started with guitar.

If individual lesson at group price is the issue I would be concerned the lessons may not last before investing in a keyboard.

Why would you be in guitar group WhatsApp if child not a guitar player?

VitalsStable · 21/02/2022 15:23

Your tone and messages sound very rude. I think you'd have got my back up if you replied "Well I'll get her a piano then."

Your daughter obviously isn't set on the piano if she's asked to learn the guitar, what is the problem with her having a little guitar and doing the group lesson with her friends? It should be what your daughter wants to do really or she won't commit to it properly.

Candleabra · 21/02/2022 15:23

Ask your daughter what instrument she wants to learn. Then make sure she has that instrument to practice on.
I know buying a piano is a big commitment but you can’t learn without one at home. Even a keyboard isn’t good enough really.

KaptainKaveman · 21/02/2022 15:26

@CarolinaStabril

Hi I’m just looking for other opinions please. My daughter Yr 1 started piano lessons last term. We signed up for group tuition as this was cheaper but as of yet the teacher is unable to group her as no other children in her class have signed up.

She missed 3 lessons due to Covid and the teacher kindly offered to carry them over.

The piano teacher also teaches guitar and she messaged me saying that my daughter wanted to swap to guitar. I said thanks but I’d like her to stick to piano. Teacher then messaged back saying guitar would be better as she would be in a group with other children and she would be able to practise at home.
I replied no I want her to stick to piano. Teacher then became quite (in my opinion) blunt and basically said that her progress would therefore be very limited as she does not have a piano or keyboard to practise on at home. I then responded with well I’ll get her a piano then!
I just feel the teacher is trying to control my decision for my daughter to learn piano- not sure if I’ve misread the situation?

So....the teacher 'kindly offered to carry them over' and yet you see her as someone who dislikes you? she was under no obligation to do this.

You signed up for 'group piano lessons' (whatever they are) because it was cheaper, yet you still have no piano on which to practice. Cost is clearly a big factor for you.

Your dd's music teacher has offered a lot of advice which is borne of experience but you refuse to accept it. You sound very entitled and spoilt.

KaptainKaveman · 21/02/2022 15:27

How will you choose your piano, OP?

Butitsnotfunnyisititsserious · 21/02/2022 15:31

Tbh you sound hard work. She carried over lessons that she didn't have to, suggested you get your daughter an instrument to practise on and when you said you didn't want her to do guitar, removed you from a group about it.

DartmoorChef · 21/02/2022 15:32

Yabu. I also think piano lessons should be 1 to 1 too. I learned with a private tutor for 4 years and can't even imagine how a group lesson could work.

donquixotedelamancha · 21/02/2022 15:33

I just feel it should be my decision (and my daughters) what instrument I sign up for, not the teacher trying to talk me out of my decision

Are you like this with all professionals?

Do you resent when the doctor tries to diagnose your illness?

Do you go to the mechanic and say 'The brakes aren't working, I don't care what you think is the matter please change the wiper blades'?

donquixotedelamancha · 21/02/2022 15:37

Hi I’m just looking for other opinions please.

Just checking: are music teachers banned from giving their opinion on this thread too, or is it just IRL?