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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parents smoking weed?

138 replies

buttercrinkle · 21/02/2022 08:57

I'm in a mum group on Facebook and a poll was posted about whether we smoke weed or not, I ticked no, but was in the minority!

Most of them said they do smoke it regularly, when their children are in bed. They said there's nothing wrong with it and it's similar to having a drink.

I just don't think I'd be able to be on the ball if there was an emergency or something similar. What if your child needed to go to a&e? Although I suppose some people don't drive. I'd feel the same about getting drunk with DS asleep upstairs.

Am I being an unreasonable prude?

OP posts:
SaySomethingMan · 21/02/2022 08:58

Not sure which type of parenting group you’re in but there are many that weed smokers would be in the minority.

Original poster
buttercrinkle · 21/02/2022 09:00

Not sure if I can post the name of the group. It's fairly well known for being a bit like that. It has been reported in the sun etc.

I'm admittedly nosey and just lurk on there, not a poster.

OP posts:
Xmassprout · 21/02/2022 09:01

Presumably if they needed to go to a+e they could get a taxi, or a lift from friends or family, or an ambulance in an absolute emergency.

I can't get worked up about other people doing it. Not something I would personally do, but I don't judge others for doing it

takealettermsjones · 21/02/2022 09:01

You'll get loads of people telling you to lighten up and that it's no big deal, but I've seen weed ruin people's lives and make their families'/children's lives hell, so imo you're neither unreasonable nor a prude.

Pyri · 21/02/2022 09:02

This is MN, literally no one is going to tell you that they smoke weed and the posts will be:
Police. Now.

Of course this isn’t normal, but I also don’t think it’s representative of real life. What mum group is this?! I’d it’s “boho mummies” or something then the group may be self selecting

nanbread · 21/02/2022 09:02

I would think a survey like that would bring all the weed smokers out tbh, it's not v scientific.

I also think there's a massive difference between smoking weed heavily every day and having the odd puff on a weekend.

I'd guess about a quarter of my friends smoke weed sometimes.

There are loads of parents who wouldn't think twice about drinking a bottle of wine at home. I don't see it as much worse really, except for perhaps funding the drugs "industry" if they don't grown their own.

Original poster
buttercrinkle · 21/02/2022 09:03

I'm definitely not judging, I just found it surprising and couldn't see myself doing the same.

I have smoked weed in the past, quite heavily. And have a history with other drugs, before having DS.

OP posts:
nanbread · 21/02/2022 09:04

@takealettermsjones

You'll get loads of people telling you to lighten up and that it's no big deal, but I've seen weed ruin people's lives and make their families'/children's lives hell, so imo you're neither unreasonable nor a prude.
You could say the same for booze though.

I am not endorsing either... I don't smoke weed and while I do drink it's usually very small quantities.

nanbread · 21/02/2022 09:05

I get where you're coming from OP.

I'm always quite surprised that lots of my mum friends still take coke / smoke weed, especially at home.

But then it doesn't appeal to me any more. It obviously appealed at some point...

Eustaciavile · 21/02/2022 09:07

Tell them that by smoking their “oh so edgy” weed, they are directly contributing to the criminal exploitation of children; feels a bit less cool and boho when viewed like that ☹️

nanbread · 21/02/2022 09:08

@Eustaciavile

Tell them that by smoking their “oh so edgy” weed, they are directly contributing to the criminal exploitation of children; feels a bit less cool and boho when viewed like that ☹️
Unless they grow their own of course
Original poster
buttercrinkle · 21/02/2022 09:11

@Eustaciavile

Tell them that by smoking their “oh so edgy” weed, they are directly contributing to the criminal exploitation of children; feels a bit less cool and boho when viewed like that ☹️
I know that a lot of cannabis is grown in the UK, in houses by drug dealers
OP posts:
Nameynameynamechanging · 21/02/2022 09:12

I smoke it regularly.

I had cancer and have lots of painful issues after it.

I am more in control and less 'out of it' on weed as opposed to the pills the doctor gives me.

I get it from someone who grows it in their own property so no exploitation involved.

In general its no worse than having a couple of glasses of wine.
Nor is it 'cool' or 'edgy' Confused

RockstarDotCom · 21/02/2022 09:13

I’ve never known anyone that has kids and smokes weed, that I’ve liked. Not an extensive study, but the ones I’ve known have all been irresponsible and shit parents.

ShadowPuppets · 21/02/2022 09:18

Ive never got on with it but I don’t have any issues with it, I’ve been in the house with the kids of an evening past the point that I would drive (eg I wouldn’t feel comfortable driving if DH and I had shared a bottle of wine on a Friday night and that’s pretty standard).

The only time I’ve really taken issue with weed is when we had a neighbour that smoked it by our window and one quick conversation later he smoked it on the other side of his garden. But I’d feel like that about any smell - a bbq or similar.

I’m knee deep in tiny children at the moment but I am looking forward to getting back to music festivals and mind bending recreationals one day - for now drugs aren’t my bag (beyond the half a bottle on a Friday night!) - I can’t find it in myself to judge too much.

Lampface · 21/02/2022 09:22

I don't smoke but I don't think there's anything specifically wrong with it as a very occasional thing - but smoking every night is just as bad as drinking every night in my eyes.

At least one parent needs to be sober enough to manage an emergency and that should be a priority.

Featuredcreature · 21/02/2022 09:25

Meh, who cares. Its fucking legal in most of America and Canada, less harmful than alcohol. I'm pretty sure you could still deal with an emergency after a joint. Exactly how is it directly responsible for the exploitation of children Confused.

grey12 · 21/02/2022 09:27

Shall we also shame all the parents taking anxiety or depression medication? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sharing a spliff (how do you write that?! Confused) won't get you very high at all. (Me being someone who never does any drugs or drinking and I only smoked weed a couple of times)

Of course it depends on how much. For example a small glass of wine is ok but half a bottle would be worrying

Giraffesandbottoms · 21/02/2022 09:31

It’s fucking up. Drinking when you have children is fucked up. Doing any drugs is fucked up.

There’s a time and a place and being a parent is not the time and place. If you want to do it, wait until children have left home and fill your boots.

RocketPanda · 21/02/2022 09:34

I can't get too worked up about home grown weed, but I find people who smoke it regularly seem to have the smell constantly coming out their pores or something, it's stink and makes me feel sick.

Nameynameynamechanging · 21/02/2022 09:36

@Giraffesandbottoms

It’s fucking up. Drinking when you have children is fucked up. Doing any drugs is fucked up.

There’s a time and a place and being a parent is not the time and place. If you want to do it, wait until children have left home and fill your boots.

You think people shouldn't have a drink drink or smoke a joint for the 18+ years their kids live at home because its 'fucked up'? Confused

Do any other groups of people have to martyr themselves, or is it just parents?

Pyri · 21/02/2022 09:36

Drinking when you have children is fucked up…. If you want to do it, wait until children have left home and fill your boots

You seriously think people should give up having an occasional glass of wine for EIGHTEEN YEARS until their children have left home?!

Mumsnet is nuts

girlmom21 · 21/02/2022 09:36

I don't think anyone should be smoking at all with children in the house.

I would worry about the children being impacted by the drugs too. That's the biggest fear for me - as we know the effects it can have on the brain.

I think that's why it's different to drinking. With alcohol there's no actual impact on a sleeping child but with second hand smoke etc there is.

Saying that I rarely drink with children in the house either.

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 21/02/2022 09:40

When I smoke weed I don't get to the point where I'm incapacitated so it's no worse than a glass of wine for me. I would never take so much of any substance that I can't deal with a crisis while I'm in charge of my DS.

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 21/02/2022 09:41

@Giraffesandbottoms

It’s fucking up. Drinking when you have children is fucked up. Doing any drugs is fucked up.

There’s a time and a place and being a parent is not the time and place. If you want to do it, wait until children have left home and fill your boots.

Lol
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