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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

"I didn't want to read and run"

141 replies

saraclara · 17/02/2022 12:29

Seriously, don't do this. What's the point? What does it even say to anyone? It adds nothing to what follows. How does it help the OP, who is generally posting about something distressing?

The ridiculous thing is that almost always, people who start with this phrase then make a perfectly average length post below it, just like everyone else.

Aaaaargh. It infuriates me. AIBU? (hint: I'm not)

OP posts:

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2022 12:45

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Or “I am bumping the thread for you”.

FantasticFebruary · 17/02/2022 12:47

@PurpleDaisies

The honest translation of “I didn’t want to read and run” is “I’m placemarking for updates”.

Not necessarily.

There was a thread the other night, Late on, the OP had bumped it, but had no replies. I couldn't help at all, but I hoped bumping it would bring it to the attention of someone who could.

No need to accuse everyone of being the same as yourself

Original poster

saraclara · 17/02/2022 12:47

@PurpleDaisies

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Or “I am bumping the thread for you”.

Exactly.

OP posts:

AlmostUnbelievable · 17/02/2022 12:48

@saraclara

I hate you all!!!

This made me laugh. You're good natured and I liked that.

FantasticFebruary · 17/02/2022 12:48

@eldora

YABU. When I've posted threads asking for advice, I have appreciated the people who didn't have much to advise but didn't want to leave my thread languishing at the bottom of the page.

I think it's a small kindness, that those with cynical hearts don't understand.

Pretty soon it will be forbidden to to use a smile emoji on this board, if some had their way

If all the whingers got their way, the site would close!!

gamerchick · 17/02/2022 12:49

@PurpleDaisies

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Or “I am bumping the thread for you”.

I usually do this. But it doesn't matter how a thread is bumped. It just doesn't.

All this whinging about none stuff is getting right on my tit ends.

eldora · 17/02/2022 12:49

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Oh for fuck's sake, who made you thread police? You're not good natured, you're controlling.

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2022 12:50

If all the whingers got their way, the site would close!!

How is that a logical outcome of the “whingers” getting their way?

Posters love a whinging thread. For or against, they always attract a lot of traffic.

eldora · 17/02/2022 12:50

If all the whingers got their way, the site would close!!

And over the most pointless shit. It's arrogant and superior, and so unnecessary.

Tretchikoff · 17/02/2022 12:51

Read and run is a throwback from when (some) forums had counters on them. It showed how many people had read the post.
It was really to show the OP that they had read the thread but not answered rather than have the counter showing so many people having read but not answered.

babyjellyfish · 17/02/2022 12:51

Sometimes I see someone has posted something really difficult and got no replies. Perhaps it's nicer to say something even if it's just "I don't want you to feel ignored"?

TheOrigRights · 17/02/2022 12:51

Maybe it feels uncomfortably voyeuristic?

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2022 12:52

@eldora

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Oh for fuck's sake, who made you thread police? You're not good natured, you're controlling.

This is a thread about the use of “didn’t want to read and run”. I would not post anything in response to people doing that on other threads. I don’t know how that’s controlling.

eldora · 17/02/2022 12:53

@PurpleDaisies because those people are reading this thread too.

Original poster

saraclara · 17/02/2022 12:55

@AlmostUnbelievable I actually made this OP to sift posters into 'those I like' and 'those who are entirely unreasonable'

You've made the first group on my spreadsheet.

OP posts:

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2022 12:55

[quote eldora]@PurpleDaisies because those people are reading this thread too.[/quote]
It’s a lighthearted moaning thread.

I think some posters here really need to lighten up a bit and take it in the spirit in which it was obviously intended.

newfacesamelife · 17/02/2022 12:56

@Pleasebeafleabite

It shows empathy and bumps the thread

Sometimes empathy is underrated compared to the crap advice on here

This. The poster is saying that they don't have the experience to offer helpful advice, but they want to let the person know that they have sympathy and caring for the situation they are going through.

Surely anyone who has experienced deep distress understands the value of knowing someone wants you to know they have heard you and cared?

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2022 12:56

Damn. I posted lightheartedly without using a smiley face.
I don’t know how anyone will know.

Original poster

saraclara · 17/02/2022 12:59

More than 55 people think I'm being unreasonable? The world is going to hell in a handcart.

OP posts:

LadyPropane · 17/02/2022 13:00

I'll tell you a secret ... I often read and run it makes me feel so naughty. I'm like a thief in the night!

newfacesamelife · 17/02/2022 13:02

It’s a lighthearted moaning thread. I think some posters here really need to lighten up a bit and take it in the spirit in which it was obviously intended

But having a go at people who are trying to show empathy to someone in pain does not make you a fun-loving, light hearted japster. It just makes you a bit of wanker.

I think I just made OPs second list

melj1213 · 17/02/2022 13:02

As a PP said it comes from forums where there are view counts on threads so people don't want to just read and not leave any feedback.

Also sometimes I will read a thread and have advice/relevent experience but I don't have time to post right there and then but don't want to lose track of the thread/forget so I will post to effectively say "This is my placeholder comment - I will be back with something more indepth when I get chance but for now know that people have read and are sympathetic to your situation"

AlmostUnbelievable · 17/02/2022 13:03

[quote saraclara]@AlmostUnbelievable I actually made this OP to sift posters into 'those I like' and 'those who are entirely unreasonable'

You've made the first group on my spreadsheet. [/quote]
Hahaha! That actually made me break into another chuckle. Oh man. I wish I knew you in real life, could really do with being round someone like you right now, hearing your view on the world down at the pub.

Sigh. Ah well. Glad I at least made it on your spreadsheet today 😊👍

Original poster

saraclara · 17/02/2022 13:05

As a PP said it comes from forums where there are view counts on threads so people don't want to just read and not leave any feedback.

But again, 'I'm sorry you're going through this' achieves the same thing and is a whole word shorter for anyone genuinely in a rush.

OP posts:

TriptotheBog · 17/02/2022 13:06

@eldora

But you can bump a thread just by saying 'I'm so sorry you're going through this'.

Oh for fuck's sake, who made you thread police? You're not good natured, you're controlling.

Nobody have an option on anything, it might upset you!

Blimey, they just made a suggestion

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