To never drive on a motorway

[Cheesechips]

I was a late learner, and passed my driving test in September last year. The thought of driving on motorways terrifies me. It's mainly having to join traffic from a slip road. Even 60mph roads scare the hell out me. I drive daily to work but it's a 3 mile trip round the outskirts of London which I'm very confident with, 20-30mph roads. How do you get over the fear of motorways or faster speeds, or did you come to terms with just not motorway driving? My husband is a very confident driver and is happy to do the motorway drives so it's not essential for me at the moment.

It just takes time and practice.
I used to be a terrified driver, wouldn't ever go above 40mph or 4th gear!!! Tbh I was probably so nervous I was dangerous :(

However I had to start driving more and purchased a satnav which helped.
Just take your time, stick in the left lane and stay at 60mph behind a lorry if need be.
Over time you'll gain confidence :)

In no time you'll understand the joys of middle lane hoggers, no indication, too slow, too fast, lorries pulling out Infront of you

I don't like motorways either - especially the M25! The M3 is ok since it went to four lanes as it is quieter.

I agree that some motorways are fine (I wouldn't practice on the A3 by the way, that is a horrible road used like a racetrack).

I don't agree it's massively limiting not to use them, journeys just take a bit longer and it certainly shouldn't stop the pp who said she can't take her kids on day trips - you can - you just use A (or B!) roads. And you get to see places that you wouldn't otherwise see.

It's important you get over this as if you aren't confident enough to use a motorway, you probably aren't safe to be on the road

this is utter nonsense. Why do MNers say this?

Now he’s no longer there to do the motorway driving, DM is marooned and isolated

perplexed at this. Posters on this thread do know that other roads exist?

For example if you wanted to go from Reading to Bristol you could use the A4 rather than the M4.

I come from somewhere where the motorways are really only dual carriageways. I started driving on motorways of necessity in my 50’s and with my teeth gritted. Only through doing it and gaining experience does it become easier but it never becomes really relaxed — I’m always very vigilant. It’s the heavy vehicles I find most daunting.
However apparently statistics say there is more likelihood of having an accident on more minor roads.
I just make sure I clearly indicate my intentions and remain aware that larger vehicles take longer to brake.
When planning routes online I tick to avoid motorways when possible. If you check the time difference is often fairly small. Motorways are generally quite boring and I’ve travelled a larger part of England than many Brits, and smaller roads are more interesting when out of urban areas.
Maybe take a Defensive Driving Course as this will tell you situations to avoid and give you more confidence.
Other drivers are alert to fact that other traffic will be entering the motorway and will slow for you if they don’t plan on having a collision!
Good luck

It’s like most things you face your fears and motorway driving is that something you need to do on occasion. If you never do it course it sounds frightening going at 60 mph when your used to driving at 30mph . I had a job and I rarely drove on motorway it wasn’t part of my commute so i was a little anxious if I had to . Now I drive on motorway every day and I’m much more confident driving and overtaking. My advice get used to getting on a off motorway just a short distance a junction or 2 , some junctions you don’t need to move over from the slip road you are straight onto lane so stay in the left at 50 mph and just get used to speeding up . A lot of people don’t like the changing lanes part and overtaking etc but that again comes with practice and confidence.

I don't like motorways either - especially the M25!

It’s probably one of the least nerve wracking, it’s in car park mode more often than not.

How is someone marooned if they don't drive on the motorway?! I haven't driven on one for more than ten years and have driven all over England in that time?!

Other roads do exist?!

Honestly motorways are the easiest roads to drive on.
Practise makes perfect.

As you say the only tricky part are the slip roads but having a second person in the car to check it’s clear will make it a lot easier.

I would have lessons but also go out at quiet times (even during the night) and just practice joining from the slip roads and moving to the middle lane.

I can do motorways with my eyes closed (not literally) as I find them so easy but country lanes with no lines in the middle can literally make me cry as I hate them.

Practise. My dad used to take me on motorway late summers evenings so after rush hour and much quieter. Got me used to getting up speed and joining. Most driving instructors offer advanced courses or specific motorway driving

@JuergenSchwarzwald

Now he’s no longer there to do the motorway driving, DM is marooned and isolated

perplexed at this. Posters on this thread do know that other roads exist?

For example if you wanted to go from Reading to Bristol you could use the A4 rather than the M4.

You’re quoting my post - in my DM’s situation, she has to take the M25, then two other motorways because of where she is. She finds the thought of a 3 hour motorway drive impossible but thinks that a 5-6 hour drive on A roads is just as unmanageable.

OP, I’d take some extra lessons. Motorways are very easy to join once you are confident enough to join at a speed a little quicker than the traffic, as it’s far easier to slow down to slot into traffic than it is to speed up. Where I’m from, it’s called “merging like a zipper”.

(There’s lots of videos about zipper merging from different countries on YouTube).

Oddly a significant number of motorists in the UK attempt to join a motorway slower than the motorway speed which leads to congestion around junctions.

The M25 is the seventh circle of hell, so maybe don’t start there, but the M40 westbound is pretty quiet most of the time.

I didn’t learn to drive until I was late 30s. I needed to pass to get to my new job and I needed to motorway drive to get there.
To avoid the idea of the motorway becoming overwhelming, I did a short motorway drive in the day I passed my test. It was fine.

I am a late learner and also have terrible sense of distance so motorways are quite scary BuT the key thing is that no on wants to hit you! So be confident and go for it.

And practice

Driving on the m25 gives me an adrenaline rush like no other. It’s like being high on fear esp when in the fast way! Eooooo!

Motorway driving is far easier, and safer than regular road driving. It just looks scarier. I did my first motorway drive early on a Sunday morning so there were no other cars at all. Still almost had a panic attack once I turned onto the slip road and knew there was no going back.

As well as the motorway lessons, you can build up your confidence on A roads, as a previous poster suggested, @Cheesechips. Coming onto an A road via a slip road gives you practice for getting onto the motorway, and driving on a dual carriageway is not too different from driving on a 3 or 4 lane motorway.

And the more driving you do, the more confident you will become.

Or is there someone you can take with you so you always have the option to pull over on the hardshoulder and switch if you need to?

Really? Stop on the hard shoulder to swap seats? Don’t even think of doing this, it’s far too dangerous. Come off at the next junction instead and find somewhere safe to stop

It’s also illegal!

Or is there someone you can take with you so you always have the option to pull over on the hardshoulder and switch if you need to?

The whole of this is just absolutely crackers.

a) the requirement to always have someone in the car to switch over with?

b) stopping on the hard shoulder to switch?

WTAF?

In the first instance - if you have to take someone with you to switch over at the hard bits, you can't actually drive properly and should take motorway lessons until you can.

The second is just plain illegal. Don't ever follow this insane advice.

Practice at quieter times of the day. The longer you leave it the bigger the fear will become. I'm the opposite of you and LOVE a fast motorway! You can always sit in the inside lane for your first few goes (and not sit in the middle lane, argh those drivers are infuriating!!!)

I'm 33 - I've been driving for four years and have never driven on a motorway.

To get to the nearest one from here is about an hours' drive and I've just never needed to.

DH didn't go on a motorway for ten years after passing his test. Again, due to our location. We're so rural that the nearest motorway is ages away - it's quicker to get around via A roads than it is to get to the motorway first.

@WindyState

Motorway driving is literally the easiest driving you can do. Just take a lesson to get over the initial anxiety and go for it.

I see a lot of people saying this but it's practically impossible to get lessons at the moment.

Also, even if it was, I'd need to pay for a day of my instructors' time just to do a couple of hours of motorway driving due to our location.

Lots of people live nowhere near a motorway so getting out there and practising just isn't an option.

My Mums not been on a motorway for 15 years....just drives local

My husband was the same when he passed. He overcame this by using the motorway with me in the passenger seat looking over his shoulder (blind spot and lane that he wanted to join) and confirming safe gap to move across. After a couple of months (we didn’t need to use the motorway a lot at that time) he felt comfortable on his. We sometimes used to join the motorway and get off at the next junction - so it was just for practice. Have you got anyone you trust to sit in the car with you? If not, agree with pp re pass plus lessons. Good luck 🤞🏽

Slip lanes are not as scary as they sound. People know you have to get on, and they’ll let you in. You don’t have to do any other lane changing unless you want to, but because you’re only dealing with traffic in one direction, again it’s easier than you think. Definitely get a couple of lessons.

@bridgetreilly

Slip lanes are not as scary as they sound. People know you have to get on, and they’ll let you in. You don’t have to do any other lane changing unless you want to, but because you’re only dealing with traffic in one direction, again it’s easier than you think. Definitely get a couple of lessons.

This. I try to pull out if I’m in the inside lane when approaching a junction, a lot of drivers do it. It’s called being considerate to other road users.