To think MN is full of really stupid advice/ideas?

[StupidAdvice]

For starters:

"Kick him out and change the locks" (you mostly can't just do this - especially not if you jointly own the property).

"You're his common law wife so you are entitled to half of everything" (no, no, no).

"You're entitled to stay in the family home if you separate" (maybe, but probably not).

"Keep all the evidence of him cheating because you'll need it when you negotiate a settlement" (no you won't, and you're wasting your time: the law doesn't care who cheated or why or when).

"Just take the kids and leave him" (it's mostly not that easy).

There's lots of brilliant advice too, obviously - but AIBU to want to bang my head on the desk when people repeatedly trot out a pile of bollocks as if it were fact?

@hopeishere

The worst I saw was bake your own bread to save money. Like a loaf is what £1.10? Bread ingredients would be more plus the faff plus the risk you'd fuck it up anyway.

More like 50p. From Aldi anyway. Decent loaf too, lasts a week before it starts to go stale. Baking a loaf takes WAAAAAY more time, effort, ingredients, and money (for gas.) I thought the people baking their own bread during the covid lockdowns - allegedly to save money - was batshit.

Lots of stuff you buy now, is cheaper than making it/cooking it from scratch. And it tastes just as good/sometimes better, and there's a LOT less mess/washing up. I think people who cook from scratch all the time, are martyrs with nothing better to do with their life tbh. (Unless of course, they absolutely LOVE cooking, and spending 20-25 hours a week in the kitchen, cooking food from scratch for their family.)

I have better things to do frankly, and will rarely cook from scratch, not when I can get something just as good, and cheaper, and that can be prepared/cooked 3 or 4 times quicker, because it's already made!!

You often hear people talking about batch cooking which probably does save money per portion of what unsure making. But I think a lot of MN /people in general overlook the outlay needed to get all the store cupboard ingredients. If you
have a very small amount of money you actually haven't got enough to buy a bigger pack of chicken/pasta/potatoes etc even if its cheaper per 100g as well as oil, spices, herbs "incidental" ingredients

Nothing compares to a poster suggesting milk is not essential during lockdown- pretty sure a poster suggested substituting it with cheese , although that might be a Mandela effect as it's been spoken about so much in other posts I may have imagined it on the OP all that time ago.

It really is mental on here at times. I do like that the majority of advice is positive and productive though.

Unsure = you're

@Mothermorph I don't like to admit I am not a batch cooking mum at all, your post is refreshing. I get the reasons for doing it but I can pull together a more successful last minute meal with random ingredients, than hoping I remember to pull something out the freezer in time for it to thaw.

However @HelloFrostyMorning I do love baking bread. DH is half Iranian so I make flatbread and Nan-e-babri (Naan) loads. But my plain white loaves are rubbish and I bloody love the super toastie Warburtons loaf!

@NatriumChloride

YABU, because you forgot to tell the OP to take in some extra ironing, hire an au pair and go on a spa day - all fantastic pearls of wisdom.

and to cancel the cheque.

@Leilala

I never mention my job but find some of the medical advice on here questionable. If you don’t know why would you advise people?

Guess it’s the same for other advice people hand out

OMG YES! I’ve only been on here for a very short time, but have stopped commenting on medical matters. Even when I’ve occasionally mentioned my job, it’s just overlooked and dodgy advice/health beliefs prevail 😂

YANBU, loads of ridiculous advice on here.

However I would say that there is probably slightly less ridiculous advice than a lot of other parenting forums. You're always going to get stupid comments on popular forums, but I think MN is not too bad, overall. There is usually plenty of decent advice mixed in with all of the stupid stuff.

Honestly I hate it on here. I have been around for years and it just makes me feel like shit. I always get attacked for being posh or privileged and I am nothing of the sort. I can’t count how many times I have been called stupid.
The LTB stuff does my head in too.

"It's the frequent advice to take action that will destroy entire families , that really bothers me. MNers love to wind people up and advise really confrontational responses to things that would eventually burn out otherwise. "

I totally agree with that. There's been threads were the OP has been whipped up into sending texts that will end life long friendships, when they wasn't necessary. There's some posters who don't seem to see the value in having friends or family. They certainly don't want other people in their lives and wouldn't do anyone a favour under any circumstances.

I agree with most of the ltb threads. I'd say that this site is really good at calling out abusive behaviour.

@MissLucyEyelesbarrow 18 is a legal age to do/purchase stuff. But when it comes to the law and services there's a recognition that different serves are needed for 18-24 year olds and that spans across health, MH, justice system, addiction, sexual health, employment/training advice etc.

18 is the legal age of adulthood. MNetters are obsessed with the 'frontal lobe doesn't mature until you're 26' factoid. Throughout history, people of 25 and younger have successfully raised families/held down jobs/functioned as adults.

Indeed - even some people at 18.

@Ponoka7 What are some examples of the Law treating 18-24 year olds differently from other adults? I’m not being arsey - I genuinely can’t think of any.

I realised that I needed to take everything posted with a huge pinch of salt when I clocked three people that I know in real life in here, all living lives that are completely fabricated.

@Pyewhacket

"Kick him out and change the locks"

Trying to evict somebody from their own property will get you up before a magistrate.

That is generally the advice given to people who live in their own home, and have found themselves lumbered with a cocklodger.

@pictish

MN is full of people offering strident advice they’d never follow themselves.

100% this

I completely agree.

Responses about how posts are written rather than responding to the post.
Responses judging people.
Responses telling someone their partner is an AH and to get rid.
Unbelievable!

You forgot take 2 showers a day, buy a gold plated toilet brush and get your ducks in a row

I never mention my job but find some of the medical advice on here questionable. If you don’t know why would you advise people?

Guess it’s the same for other advice people hand out

I think the theory goes something like this.

OK, in an ideal world you would see one expert consultant who knows everything and will give you the correct advice. On a good day I know approximately one five hundredth of what an expert knows. So if 499 other people like me chip in with their ill-informed halfwitted pontifications then together it will add up to good advice

Who needs quality when you've got quantity ...

@HelloFrostyMorning I don't care what people do with cooking. But generally cooking from scratch is cheaper than the same quality ready made. Lots of ready-made stuff tastes so good because of sugar or fat.

What I notice is the misplaced confidence that everyone can access the support and help they need. Some people do obviously. But whenever anyone is skint I see people posting about the help that the OP is unlikely to be able to access, with the exception of the foodbank.
Things like discretionary housing allowance are really hard to get. Your average person struggling on benefits that are too low is unlikely to get it.
But I feel sometimes posters want to believe there is lots of help out there and that people don't really have to live on such little money.

@SquirrelG

18 is the legal age of adulthood. MNetters are obsessed with the 'frontal lobe doesn't mature until you're 26' factoid. Throughout history, people of 25 and younger have successfully raised families/held down jobs/functioned as adults.

Indeed - even some people at 18.

Even the scientist who discovered this says it is being overapplied as there is no evidence this affects how people act in real life.

@Eastie77Returns

Before joining MN I had no idea

• that it’s completely irresponsible to drink in the evening if you have DC because you might need to drive them to hospital

• if there’s a knock at the door and you’re not expecting a visitor it’s reasonable to not open under any circumstances.

• you should call non emergency police to log suspicious behaviour such as a stranger sitting in a car on your street.

• taking in a lodger (alongside ironing) is a quick and simple way to make money if you are struggling. Alternatively “just move to a cheaper part of the country”. If you live in London you can easily move 300 miles away to somewhere in the North where housing is cheap and plentiful. If you’re not prepared to do that…well you’re just not trying.

This site is a parallel universe

The moving advice is very London centric, and also assumes house in the mystical North cost tuppence ha'penny. Funnily enough lots of people can't afford a house in the North either, even if they cancel their Sky.

'Divorce him and he'll HAVE to do 50% of the childcare' is often mentioned. He doesn't have to have the DC at all. Another favourite is 'I'm looking for a summer dress but I'm on a strict budget' and the OP is advised to try Rixo.

I can only really remember one thread where some idiot actually followed the bullshit advice given to her about her dh and a colleague and she publicly humiliated herself and fucked it all up. I imagine that to be the standard result of following relationship advice from here

😂😂 some of these are hilarious. I agree how ridiculous it is to take in ironing to make extra money but even more ridiculous is taking in a lodger . I mean who the hell wants a stranger in their house around their children 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️