To ask are you happy?

[Lily2075]

I don't really see how people are. Life just seems like years and years of working. I go to work and I don't care about any of it. I'm not motivated to do well because none of it means anything to me. Then I go home and do nothing and get up to go to work again. What's the point?

Yes I am. Spending time with good family and friends makes me happy. My job is boring but I enjoy the rest of my life.

Nope, not really.

Yes, I feel happy. Really though, it's about setting up work, hobbies and family to be what you enjoy. I really enjoy my job - but it took me several years to get into the right industry with the right qualifications. I have a couple of hobbies that I enjoy, but they didn't just happen I had to find them and work at them (whether that's gym, languages, painting or whatever). So I think people make their own happiness and set themselves up for what they enjoy.

No, not really. It hasn't been a good start to 2022 for me.

I'm generally quite content.
It's ok to settle for less than permanent euphoria.
Find little things. Little rituals.
Find aspects of your job you like, or if you can't, find ways to try to improve the workplace. Try to make a friend at work. Try to take pride in your work and realise its value.

I understand what you mean op.

I'm not unhappy...I'm relatively pleased with my life. It could be a lot worse.

However, I think life is often objectively shit...not my life in particular but for everyone. I also wonder how so many people seem to go through life in a kind of oblivious trance to how crap things are

I’ve been feeling a bit down lately. 3 kids and work - it’s like a never ending merry go round: seem to spend most of my life in the car, at work or in the kitchen preparing dinner or tidying up after dinner. Don’t have the energy for much else. The days pass by in a blur. There’s a fair chance that at least one kid will be miserable at any given time. It’s draining.

I’m hoping things will feel a lot better in Spring with more daylight hours.

Best advice my Grandad gave me- "you'll be working most your life so it may as well be doing something you love". I work with children, it pays peanuts and can be stressful at times but wouldn't change it for the world because I love it so much. I'm happy and feel I have a good work/home life balance.

Does there have to be a point to life? Of course life is pointless in the sense that you are not going to achieve anything at the end of it. Every animal on earth including us has the same life if they are lucky, wake up, work to get food, rest, sleep.

I think it's better to focus on enjoying a few individual moments each day, laughing at a funny story your colleague told, eating a nice biscuit, good song on the radio in the car, reading something interesting on here.

Yes. Pretty much always.

My life is far from perfect, my husband and I work too many hours, life is hectic, stressful, busy, but yes I am happy.

I'm definitely a glass half full person and I think I'm happy. I count my blessings, I have an amazing husband, we have good jobs , happy children, can afford a holiday every year and short breaks etc

I feel the same. I just sadly don’t get the same kind of joy that other people get out of life. It just feels like the same thing over and over. I think my life is made more complicated as I have two children with Sen and it’s severely restricted a lot of life choices.

Yes, I’m as happy as the human condition allows. I actually don’t expect to be happy all the time.

I am content. My life is quiet but I have a family, a job I enjoy and no financial worries. I look for the joy in small things, family time, reading, gardening, cooking. I'll never set the world alight but it's enough for me.

I'm happy most of the time. I think it's about your expectations.

I love my kids.
I love dp.
I feel like my job is worthwhile and that I am hood at it.
I have some hobbies I enjoy.
I have friends who's company I enjoy.

That is enough for me.

I know what you mean. Life feels very tedious right now. In theory we're freer than last year, but I have no money to enjoy it. I honestly never thought I would reach middle age more skint than I was in my twenties. So that does depress me because there's no new clothes, holidays, meals out. But I will keep trudging on. My kids are great, DH is not bad and my job is good, overall. It feels purposeful and worthwhile, even if I don't always enjoy it.

No, not since my DH died. Before then I was very happy.

I was, I sort of am. I had a well paid but boring job I was content with it though. Boring didn't matter. Dd was applying to uni and excited, ds was doing great at school, I finally had a relationship I was very happy in, plenty of money, my own home, friends etc. Me and my parents were very close. Mum had mental health issues, when I was growing up, but we had got to a good place. She was a wonderful nana. I had enough money to treat mum and dad and the kids. Exh (kids dad) was financially abusive so I had never be able to do this. I finally felt content and secure.

Then mum died, 9 weeks ago. Most things are the same. But the kids are sad, mum's death over shadowed dd getting an offer for every uni application, ds is struggling, dad's heart broken, my boring job is irritating me. Dp is still the same and brilliant.

But I don't think I will ever be as happy as I was 10 weeks ago, ever again. Or at least not in the same way.

But, my boring job is flexible and has always been remote. It's enabled me to spend loads of time with the kids, with my dad. No stress of unpaid time off as they paid me regardless of how much work I was doing. But everything is tinged with sadness and pain.

The time spent with the kids, Dp and Dad is what life is about. Time spent with my auntie going through my nanas and great nanas jewellery and her telling me where each piece came from, sharing memories has brought me some joy.

My job isn't my life. It enables me to live my life. My life is everything outside work. And even in the middle of this shit, I can find bits of happiness. It's not the same, but it's there. The way my best friend has stood with me has been amazing and brought us closer. Her and her kids make my heart feel full with how lovely they have been. Her youngest (8) sat on my knee and told me I didn't need to pretend to be ok. Her teenager threw her arms around me instead of the usually quiet 'Hi' she has given me since she turned 13 .

I am very sad. But I am also very lucky for everything I have. Happiness is just different. Mums death has made me appreciate what I do have and take the time to appreciate it more.

Hmmm sometimes. I have grown to absolutely detest my job though. Unfortunately it’s something that pays well, I’ll never get another job at this level. It’s also pretty flexible, I can mostly work from home, I choose to go to the office on occasion.
If I change jobs we will have less disposable income, less holidays, I’ll have to think before I spend. I’m not great with money, no debts but I splurge more than I should.
Our lives are busier than I would like, juggling work with my DM, DH and DD. 2022 did not get off to a good start either…

You have to be thankful for the small things. Im glad I have a job, even if I hate it, we won’t have to worry about rising energy costs/food/mortgage interest etc. I arrange things to look forward to, there’s always something, even if I’m shattered when the time comes!

It's interesting you ask OP as currently not especially, and until about a year and a bit ago I generally did feel pretty happy, not all of the time, I don't expect to be all of the time, but overall content. At the moment, it's all just getting me down really, I imagine in my case a combination of being made redundant and so starting a new job which I know is actually a very good job, but it's very long hours which makes me constantly rather anxious about workload and which also has a detrimental effect on my marriage, has caused numerous arguments. My DF died last year and I miss him horribly, and then just the whole global pandemic thing, I know things are getting better but it's just ground me down, and more so it's ground my DH down to the point he's unhappy with just the monotony of life at the moment, which again has a serious effect on our marriage. I do know that in the grand scheme of things I'm incredibly lucky and generally am an optimistic person but recently things have really really been getting me down.

No. I won't expand on it. I keep it from everyone. Irl.

The pursuit of happiness is not simple.
I feel tired, in pain and uncomfortably overweight, I'm always rushing.
My job is draining and I'm useless with money and am currently living out of an overdraft month after month.
I've upped my exercise walking 1 hour 15 mins for the school run, doing three exercise classes a week which I love but then I eat rubbish food and don't get the instant results I'd like. Exercise also makes me tired which is annoying.

I stop drinking then start drinking, half a bottle of wine 3 nights in a row last week, I know it makes me feel awful.

My family are hard work.

But, I have a lovely husband and wonderful children, we've moved to an incredible house, stunning garden, nice countryside location, kids are happy and healthy. My friends are a joy.

I just wish I wasn't so tired.

Yea I'm happy. I'm skint but life is good: we have a supportive family, I love and feel loved by my husband and children and we have a decent enough house. I enjoy my job and hobbies. Life would be easier if we had more money but I can't really say I'd be happier.

About 5/10 today.

7/10 good day, 2/10 bad day.

Agree work is overrated. especially doing it from home.

Yes. I genuinely love my life. I am very lucky in that I have a nice and supportive DH but more than luck I do put myself first and do a lot to make myself happy outside of work.

Im a very strong advocate of taking responsibility for your own happiness. Nobody gets to their deathbed and thinks "I'm glad I was such a doormat and put myself last my whole life". Also, the thought of one of my children writing half the posts on here where the OP is miserable because s/he puts themselves at the bottom of the pile breaks my heart.