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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do any of you have a pet that you actually just can't fucking stand?

500 replies

mycatisannoying · 07/02/2022 00:04

My cat. Approx 11 years old and counting! Wink I've had him for a decade. A part of me does love him, but he's a knob and lessens my quality of life rather than add anything to it. He's so whiney and food obsessed and I am seldom able to sleep the whole night through because of him.
When he departs I shall be sad, but I won't miss him, and there will be relief in a way.
He has a wonderful life here with us, and I won't give him away, because he's old and is our responsibility.
Have you ever had a love/hate relationship with a family pet?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
30
billydilly · 08/02/2022 09:33

@Lollypop701 I can't guarantee strategic pissing but anything is possible with a Bengal! Dh didn't appreciate my hoots of laughter following Pissgate but Baz the Bengal became my favourite cat, he was proud of his achievement, as you can see

Do any of you have a pet that you actually just can't fucking stand?
Lollypop701 · 08/02/2022 10:26

@billydilly absolutely gorgeous… worth every satanic moment 😂

billydilly · 08/02/2022 10:32

He is! Satanic as he may be he's my spirit animal, if only I could be as direct as he is and remain employed!

CaptainMerica · 08/02/2022 10:45

I feel your pain OP. My cats are lovely really, but they add nothing but stress to my life.

I can't open a tub of butter without them appearing out of nowhere to lick it, can't sit washing down without one of them pissing on it, and can't sit on the sofa without a cat sneaking up behind me to swipe my head with their claws. I'm constantly binning pissed on shoes, clawed clothes, all the kids wooden toys (plastic all the way now) after they pissed in the toy box...

I would never rehome them, they are mine, and I'd hate for them to be mistreated or sad. But I don't think they feel the same about me!

PaganOfTheGoodTimes · 08/02/2022 10:57

I’m another one with hated cats. I’ve had cats before, even a Bengal, but she was a gentle treasure compared to the current two. They appear to hate DH and I, luckily they are ok with the DC. They were litter mates and I think that’s a lot of the problem. They chew net fabric, like dressing up clothes have, they chew foam toys of DCs, they have 24/7 access to dry food but delight in eating enough to make themselves sick then howling for more, taking away constant dry food makes them do the sick thing more, they always throw up on carpets, apart from in winter when they’ll throw up in places you’ll step in it on the way to the loo with the lights off, they steal food, we had to buy a new fridge as they learnt to open the last one to steal chicken - that yes they’d then throw up but they damaged the door seal doing it… veg says there’s no reason for the vomit and we’ve had them from kittens so they’ve never had to learn fear of hunger (DH first cat had been left to fend for herself before he adopted her and did gorge but that was understandable). And the constant expense or whatever food they’ll deign to eat this week and cat litter that doesn’t offend them, plus the carbon footprint… I won’t replace them when they go to the great litter box in the sky but as they’re only 5 that’s a long way off.

LuckyAmy1986 · 08/02/2022 11:04

I can't open a tub of butter without them appearing out of nowhere to lick it, can't sit washing down without one of them pissing on it, and can't sit on the sofa without a cat sneaking up behind me to swipe my head with their claws. I'm constantly binning pissed on shoes, clawed clothes, all the kids wooden toys (plastic all the way now) after they pissed in the toy box

This is insane, living like this. And for what? Do they even give a shit about you? What’s the point of them? Your poor kids

LuckyAmy1986 · 08/02/2022 11:08

@AlphabetStew honestly I would re home. It’s just made your already stressful life so much more difficult. You don’t need to suffer the next ten years just because you made a mistake.

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2022 11:09

I honestly don’t know how (or why) people tolerate these kind of behaviours on a regular basis - shitting up walls, pissing on laundry, destruction to your home, not even being able to sit on your own fucking sofa without being clawed! Why?!

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2022 11:10

@CaptainMerica

I feel your pain OP. My cats are lovely really, but they add nothing but stress to my life.

I can't open a tub of butter without them appearing out of nowhere to lick it, can't sit washing down without one of them pissing on it, and can't sit on the sofa without a cat sneaking up behind me to swipe my head with their claws. I'm constantly binning pissed on shoes, clawed clothes, all the kids wooden toys (plastic all the way now) after they pissed in the toy box...

I would never rehome them, they are mine, and I'd hate for them to be mistreated or sad. But I don't think they feel the same about me!

No, I don’t think they give a shit about you. Sounds miserable living with them. And minging - cat licked butter and smelling of cat piss
Original poster
mycatisannoying · 08/02/2022 11:18

I would never mistreat my cat - or rehome him as he's old now - but he adds absolutely nothing to my life. He's just something else I need to look after, but without bringing the joy of my dog. I do love him, but the thought of him living for another decade depresses the fuck out of me.

OP posts:
CaptainMerica · 08/02/2022 11:22

@LuckyAmy1986

I can't open a tub of butter without them appearing out of nowhere to lick it, can't sit washing down without one of them pissing on it, and can't sit on the sofa without a cat sneaking up behind me to swipe my head with their claws. I'm constantly binning pissed on shoes, clawed clothes, all the kids wooden toys (plastic all the way now) after they pissed in the toy box

This is insane, living like this. And for what? Do they even give a shit about you? What’s the point of them? Your poor kids

I thought this was a light hearted thread!

Clearly no, they don't give a shit about me, but they do love my DH, and the kids are found of them.

And when you live with a dickhead cat, you do learn to adjust E.g. ninja butter spreading, where the lid is only off for the time it takes to get the knife in and out (and yes, obviously, I bin it if they get there!). Plastic lids on all the toy boxes, washing never left unattended, doors always closed etc. Sometimes I slip up, and need to wash things or bin my trainers, but the house doesn't smell of piss, and the kids are fine.

CountdownToChaos · 08/02/2022 11:58

Most relatable post I've read in a long time!!

StellaGibs · 08/02/2022 12:06

I keep my cat who claws everyone because no one would want her. Shes old too and I know she'd deteriorate without me and live her final bit of life miserable. I taught my kids to stay away from her and that she only likes me. Theyre ok with it and play with our other cat.

Ugzbugz · 08/02/2022 12:43

My cat drove me mad and was vicous then became much better in her unknown final months and she's just died and I thought I would be fine but I'm far from it, I felt like i was dying when she was and am struggling to cope with her being gone. Cats are arseholes at times and many worse than others and i used to hate being attacked but now I'm broken Sad

Beamur · 08/02/2022 13:05

Most behaviour from cats and dogs is a form of communication. It's just not always clear what they're trying to say!
Once you rule out any illness, things like pissing in the house is not typical cat behaviour. It's more likely to be stress of some kind - either from in the home or outside.
Behaviour around food is a pain but can be managed. I have 3 cats, 2 of whom are quite high energy young cats, you can't discipline cats and they respond better to diversion. Mine are in a right mood today. It's windy and they're bored. If I do nothing, they'll annoy each other and bait my other cat. So I have brought out toys and made a tower with tunnels and platforms and treats. This has kept them nicely amused for the last hour. If your cat is doing something 'bad' ask yourself 2 questions. Is this normal cat behaviour that I just don't like? Or, why is my cat doing this?
Cats are in the main, clean, inquisitive and intelligent animals. They can be enormously patient and also bored very easily.
If you give your cat a rewarding and safe home environment, chances are you be rewarded with a good relationship with that animal.
Pagan my previous oriental was a bit like this with food. We worked out that he was worse with food he liked a lot (bolt,vomit) despite never being hungry or short if food. We had to feed him his less favoured food which he would eat more slowly! Or a bigger sized kibble that had to be crunched and not swallowed whole.
I've had a couple of very challenging pets over the years, a cat who was untouchable for maybe 5 years before mellowing and a dog that drove me to the brink of being re-homed, except I didn't think it fair to inflict her on someone else!

Monopolyiscrap · 08/02/2022 13:07

My parents had a cat I loved as a child, It scratched me and hissed if I ever tried to touch it. But I still adored it. My mum told me as an adult she hated that cat and was relieved when it died. I was devastated as a child.

LuckyAmy1986 · 08/02/2022 13:24

@CaptainMerica sorry it just sounds so stressful. Like making life a lot harder for not much gain. I just can’t get my head around it that’s all!

morningstruggles · 08/02/2022 13:39

@ladycardamom

Yes. I had 2 Guinea pigs. I hated them. Useless. They got bitten by a snake and that was the end of them. Replaced them with chickens, much better pets.
Useless?! What exactly did you think their purpose was?

This is a really horrible post. You come across as happy about such a horrible fate for them.

I once read that rabbits and guinea pigs are the most mistreated animals in the UK, because so many people buy them cheaply, usually 'for the kids', and then keep them in a small cage without giving them the proper food, care, stimulation, exercise and in most cases company.

CaptainMerica · 08/02/2022 14:18

[quote LuckyAmy1986]@CaptainMerica sorry it just sounds so stressful. Like making life a lot harder for not much gain. I just can’t get my head around it that’s all![/quote]
Zero gain - but I feel I've made my bed. I felt a lot differently before I had kids. I cried the first time I left them in a cattery. Then kids came along when they were 6 or 7yo, and the amount of time I spent in the house increased, and my capacity to deal with the hassle decreased.

I think they are worse in the last few years, with us WFH etc. They want left in peace, I suspect, and that's not their fault. We do everything we can to reduce their stress levels, and they go through phases where they are not too bad, and then get worse again.

I would 100% never have another cat, but they are 14 now, and I would never rehome them.

MintyGreenDream · 08/02/2022 14:22

@LooneyLurcher what an adorable dog

HelloFrostyMorning · 08/02/2022 15:30

@LuckySantangelo35

I honestly don’t know how (or why) people tolerate these kind of behaviours on a regular basis - shitting up walls, pissing on laundry, destruction to your home, not even being able to sit on your own fucking sofa without being clawed! Why?!
Yeah this. ^

Some people seem to have a life of misery and torture from their 'pets.' I just simply would not be tolerating this. My attention-seeking fusspot of a kitty seems like a perfect Angel compared to some 'pets' on here! Shock

BellatricksStrange · 08/02/2022 15:40

@Chichimcgee

There's a huge second hand market for pets.

What an utterly revolting thing to say!

So buying a pet first hand is acceptable, but second hand is revolting? What an idiotic view to hold.

Fact is pets are both living things and playthings. They are bought for the pleasure of the owners. And if they don't bring their owners pleasure anymore, there are always other people who will get pleasure from having them.

Why would you keep on to a pet you hate? Is that more noble than selling it on to someone else who will appreciate it? I have bought second hand pets plenty of times, and on occasion also sold pets on. And why the hell not?

LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 08/02/2022 15:58

My parents had a sickly dog that had various different illnesses, which meant he was constantly covered in scabs and always had oozing, smelly ears. Envy He used to snap and be really angry all the time, I guess understandably. Poor thing. He probably should have been put out of his misery.

We also had a cat that scratched and bit anyone who touched it. She used to hold my hand between her front paws, claws out, and use her (very strong) back legs to scratch the living hell out of my lower arm. People thought I had self-harmed.

I will never have any animals again in my life.

Towerofjoyless · 08/02/2022 16:43

Hi OP I totally get where you're coming from here, we inherited my DFs cat when DF passed away, have owned cats before but had no plans to get another at the time. DF absolutely loved that cat so I couldn't bear to give him away. He is very affectionate and great with our kids but like your cat, he is disruptive when looking for food (which is a lot as he is greedy!).

We kept him in the living room at night initially but then he worked out how to open the door and came up very early in the morning, annoying us for food. We now keep him in the kitchen as the door is impossible for him to open. Every so often he will also attack my leg when I'm walking, for no obvious reason. He never does this to any other family member and I find myself quite wary when I'm walking and he's following me about (looking for food usually!).

I will miss him when he's no longer here but I won't miss some of his behaviour in the slightest! Have been put off getting another cat again in the future too because of this.

Monopolyiscrap · 08/02/2022 17:01

@BellatricksStrange it depends. Pets being passed on through various owners don't do well mentally. They need a settled home. So getting a new kitten, realising within weeks its not for you and rehoming to someone caring - fine.
Having an animal that brings you pleasure for years, then getting rid of it because it gets old and ill and hard work, is not okay.
You have to make a commitment to an animal.

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