To not want to go to wedding more than 3,000 miles away

[crimbo2008]

One of dh's family has announced she's planning on getting married abroad between Xmas and New Year 2008.

Her and her fiance are both from the same village in the UK, so there's no connection to the foreign place other than that they want to marry there.

It would cost several thousand for all 4 of us to go..at least £1200 for flights alone.

It's somewhere we've already been and have 'done that'.

It would also be very cold there at that time of year.

We could afford to do it, but it would mean not going on holiday to somewhere we haven't visited..and I begrudge feeling emotionally blackmailed to attend.

DH and dc would like to go....aibu not to want to? I've suggested dh go on his own, but I don't really like the idea of us having separate holidays as time together is very precious - plus I'd be on my own coping with dc while he's gone.

YANBU.

If they choose to get married abroad, let alone at christmas which is already an expensive time of year.

Then they can not expect anyone to come. Not only are they dictating how you spend your money but also the fact that your children will have to wait a whole year for a holiday e.g. no summer holiday like all their freinds.

My sister got married in Jamaica (sp) 12 years ago and didn't expect anyone for england to go. They just had a big party when they got home.

if I could afford it and the rest of my family wanted to go I'd go

YANBU

weddings can really bring out the worst in people, can't they !

expecting people to pay thousands and being huffy when they cannot, is just not on.

surely most people would be sensible enough to understand that a wedding thousands of miles away is going to prevent a lot of people from going?

you could always show them this thread

YANBU - I really don't understand this trend for weddings abroad - when I got married (showing my age here!) you only got married abroad if you wanted a very quiet wedding with, at most, immediate family only.

For me, one of the main points of having a wedding was that dh and I were making a commitment to each other in front of family and friends.... wouldn't have made sense to me to organise something that would have been a PITA to attend. Some of our friends did have to travel "abroad" in the sense that our wedding was in Ireland (where we are both from) and they were working in the UK.... and I was very pleased that some relatives came all the way from the US - but I would not have been offended in the slightest if they hadn't....

Ds got married (only child) at South African DDIL's home.

We could have afforded for myself and his daughter to go, but not DH or DF, so after taliking to him, none of us went, choosing insted to have a blessing here a few months later.

So know you are not BU, if I didntgo to my only childs wedding, why should you go do a not so close realtives wedding.