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AIBU?

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Original poster

Naked man in car park/view point

119 replies

FrogIAm · 29/01/2022 16:53

Local viewpoint has a natural outdoor pond which people do outdoor swimming, maybe a car park for 40 cars. Sat in the car today putting on hat etc waiting to go out, a fully completely (not even shoes) man walks in front of the car to the pool. Oh sorry he has a hat on. I got a full frontal swinging view for quite a while. We sat there initially for a few seconds in a “did I just fucking see that?”. He was with 2 women who were wearing swimming costumes. He wasn’t even carrying a towel like they were. He walked about 200m.

We were just wondering whether this was a police matter, when we noticed there was a park warden in the car park and we’re going to talk to him, but it seemed a few people had beaten us to it. Warden went and talked to the 2 women who had got out at this point and they went and got another towel for naked man, who stayed in for another 5 mins I guess hoping to avoid warden, who then talked to him in front of our car. Naked man said something like it was a shame people were offended in this day and age.

Once he was gone, suddenly everyone got out their cars, like they were waiting for it to finish. There were kids walking with families (it is the start of a scenic walk).

If he really wanted to go for a naked swim, then walk to the pond with a towel and put it down before you go in surely? Although DH said even that is flashing too much.

So, if the warden wasn’t there, would you have thought it was a police matter? Is this not ok? They might not have been there in time. I think the warden dealt with it appropriately.

YANBU - no it’s not okay to walk 200m naked with families around
YABU - of course it’s ok to see a mans genitals when you’re not expecting them

OP posts:
giveyou2reasons · 29/01/2022 18:43

I don't particularly care what people do in their own countries, if casual nudity is accepted there, etc, but I do raise an eyebrow at people who imply that you're a prudish bore if you don't want to see some random stranger's naked body. No topless women, for me, either. It's not something I want to see. Don't make me an unwilling participant in your exhibitionist tendencies!

I don't even want to look at my own naked body, tbh, so why would I want to see theirs?! Grin

Tulipomania · 29/01/2022 18:44

When I was last in San Francisco we saw a naked man walking down Union Street. He was wearing shoes and carrying a briefcase. At one point he stopped and bent over to tie his shoelace. DH would not allow me to take a photo.

Wonnle · 29/01/2022 18:45

It's the natural outdoor pond that confuses me , can you get indoor ones now then ?

Amoozbooze · 29/01/2022 18:46

I wouldn't care and I doubt my young daughter would even notice but then again I also used to live on the continent.

fluffedup · 29/01/2022 18:47

I'm confused - if it's ok for a man to walk across the car park in the nude, then how come flashing is illegal?

Reminds me of when DD was 5, she came home from school and said 'Mummy, Mummy, Fred (other 5 year old, name changed) showed us all his willy and there was a hole in the end of it!'

Then she thought about it for a bit and said 'Nobody wants to see the willies really'.

I think she was right.

Wonnle · 29/01/2022 18:47

And maybe a car park ?

MananaTomorrow · 29/01/2022 18:48

I was expected that you would. be talking about someone getting changed.

But that ?!?

cakeambush · 29/01/2022 18:53

People in this country are so terrified of bodies. We all have one FFS.

Littlescottiedog · 29/01/2022 18:56

@tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz

Until the day arrives when no one raises an eyebrow at a mother feeding her child anywhere in public without the need for any sort of cover (unless this is mums own preference) then I shall continue not to tolerate a man getting his bits out.
This!

I was in a local small woodland last summer and a man walked along the path about 10m from me, completely naked. I was shocked; just ten minutes earlier I'd been running a children's activity session and had 30-odd children and their adults with me in the space between me and the path. They'd all have copped an eye-full. It's just not appropriate. He may not have intended to cause offence or make someone uncomfortable, but he did - me. And by the grace of a few minutes, a whole load of other people.

If women can't even show nipples to breastfeed or in their own private photos (not that I know why they would want to, but I know there was that whole campaign about men being allowed to show their nipples in photos on Facebook but women couldn't) then men should not be able to show their penis in public, intent to offend or not.

5foot5 · 29/01/2022 18:57

@Ellowyn

I'm in my late 60's and when I was growing up it was not unusual for men to flash their genitals at women in parks. They'd hide in the shrubbery and wait for a woman to come by. My mother used to take a short cut to work through a park and saw the same man a few times. They used to wear raincoats. Anyway, they were doing it for some sort of sexual gratification and were known back then as perverts.

Now men think they have a free pass to visually assault women and girls for their sexual pleasure. This pervert in the OP wouldn't even carry a towel to block the view of his penis and testes. Anyone who accepts this as 'normal' in 'this day and age' are part of the problem.

IMO there is quite a bit of difference between leaping out of a bush to deliberately waggle your bits in front of a woman with the sole intention of causing alarm and going for a skinny dip.

The fact that he didn't do this alone or furtively but did it accompanied by two adult females indicates that he wasn't intending to be a threatening presence.

I am not saying I would not be a bit surprised to see this but honestly I could not get worked up about it. From the OP it sounds like most people were lurking in their cars so maybe he hadn't even seen any children about.

FAQs · 29/01/2022 19:02

If the warden wasn’t there I’d have said something to him myself 🤮

BoredZelda · 29/01/2022 19:02

Of course it is a police matter.

BoredZelda · 29/01/2022 19:02

IMO there is quite a bit of difference between leaping out of a bush to deliberately waggle your bits in front of a woman with the sole intention of causing alarm and going for a skinny dip.

Not in law there isn’t.

Lockheart · 29/01/2022 19:04

@BoredZelda

IMO there is quite a bit of difference between leaping out of a bush to deliberately waggle your bits in front of a woman with the sole intention of causing alarm and going for a skinny dip.

Not in law there isn’t.

Yes there is. It's not an offence to be naked in public unless you're intending to cause distress.
Porcupineintherough · 29/01/2022 19:05

In the UK I'd be shocked and uncomfortable about tis, in Germany it wouldnt bother me so much. Seen quite a lot of lakeside/riverside nudity there.

Lockheart · 29/01/2022 19:07

www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/nudity-public-guidance-handling-cases-naturism

The need to prove that the person exposed their genitals intending that someone will see them and be caused alarm or distress means that a naturist whose intention is limited to going about his or her lawful business naked will not be guilty of this offence.

BoreOfWhabylon · 29/01/2022 19:09

Very funny but very informative explanation of relevant law by ex-police Sgt Alfie Moore

www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m000wdgk

Porcupineintherough · 29/01/2022 19:09

I'm confused - if it's ok for a man to walk across the car park in the nude, then how come flashing is illegal?

As a pp said, its all about intent. However, given how up tight the British are about nudity and the length of his walk, I do suspect this guy's intent.

RozHuntleysStump · 29/01/2022 19:12

If he wanted to swim in the niff, he could have removed a towel at the shore or something. Nobody expects a naked penis in a car park.

Clymene · 29/01/2022 19:14

@cakeambush

People in this country are so terrified of bodies. We all have one FFS.
It's funny isn't it that it's always men who are keen to get their bodies out. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen a naked female stranger except for on a nudist beach or a changing room.

Why is that do you think? 🤔

Lockheart · 29/01/2022 19:15

@Cylmene you've clearly never been to Leeds on a night out when the students are at uni Grin

2holibobssofar · 29/01/2022 19:20

@BoredZelda it’s not a police matter as no offence was committed. It’s not illegal to be naked.
If he was touching himself, making eye contact in a way to make people uncomfortable, being threatening, that’s a police matter.

The people on this thread saying they can’t even look at their own naked body is such a sad thing to read.

Ellowyn · 29/01/2022 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Alip1965 · 29/01/2022 19:23

Not been reasonable.. the guy is out of order and his behaviour is an arrestable offence. You can still report to police and site traffic warden who, hopefully should of noted it.

Lockheart · 29/01/2022 19:24

@Alip1965

Not been reasonable.. the guy is out of order and his behaviour is an arrestable offence. You can still report to police and site traffic warden who, hopefully should of noted it.
No it isn't. I posted the CPS guidance above, why not have a look?
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