Duvet days are lazy...discuss!

[MyGhastIsFlabbered]

I said I would kill for a pyjama day but DH says they're a waste of a day and lazy. Who is unreasonable?

At the moment DH has COVID so I'm having to do all the school runs/shopping/work etc and sleep on the sofa so I don't catch it. I'm exhausted but have to keep going. Hence saying I'd love a duvet day. But DH practically sneered at me for saying it.

Of course it’s a lazy day. That doesn’t make it wrong in the slightest. It’s the whole point.

Your dh is an arse.

I completely agree.

I don’t understand why some partners think they can tell their partner what they can and can’t do - stay in your PJs and have a duvet day watching Netflix and order a takeaway.

It’s not a waste of a day if you’re enjoying yourself.

I don't like duvet days. They make me feel grim. But I like cuddling up with a cup of tea and some biscuits with a blanket on a cold afternoon.

Duvet days are lazy, agreed.
But it is also great to rest, relax, chat with family, have a mental and physical rest.
In short, yes they are lazy, but lazy days can be good for you.

Surely neither of you are BU? Everyone has individual preferences and as long they don’t cause harm, there is no need to be judgement just because it’s not what you or they like.

I am laid in bed reading this.

Its not a duvet day but will be afternoon and evening. Been up since 4am (not sleeping well). Mum recently died and I am emotionally and physically exhausted. Been to see dad with the kids. Ds (10) finally broke on the way home and cried his eyes out because he misses his nana. I pulled up and we just hugged. He is now snuggled up next to me watching spiderman. Dd (17) is laid with us watching a different film on a tablet. We have plans to only move for food and drink.

Its exactly what we need and nothing would be more productive for my kids mental health.

Ok, so maybe I phrased it wrong. It IS lazy but he was just so sneery about it. That's what got me annoyed.

It’s strange to me that taking care of our basic needs in the form of a day to rest is seen as ‘lazy’. Most people need these days because they have very busy and full lives, not because they are slovenly
Often people who find taking time out ‘lazy’ are uptight and stressed, so can’t imagine giving themselves permission to do the same. I feel for them.
Take your day, OP. It sounds lovely

So what if they are?
Isn't that the point of them?
Your husband is daft. We all need the odd lazy day!

He sounds bonkers and bit horrible actually, you're running yourself ragged and he's telling you that you can't have a rest day. I hope and pray every day my daughters don't grow up and settle down with evil men but I also include dickhead like your oh, sorry. Have a lay down and tell him to bugger off and do something on his own if he feels like all spare time is wasted time. You're doing great but lose the loser

I support your duvet day. I'm having one too. January been a really busy month and like yo,u the juggle with covid was tough. I need a day to recharge otherwise I'll continue to be exhausted and end up with poor mental health (again). I'd love not to need a duvet day but here we are.

I wasnt allowed to have days like that as a child, my parents had us on the go all the time. As adult with a chronic disease, duvet days are an essential part of self care that allow me to keep going. Unfortunately, due to my parents attitude they're always accompanied with guilt.

You have your duvet day and bloody enjoy it! Don't let anyone make you feel bad for it.

Unless you’re running round curing illnesses and feeding orphans all day, there’s no inherent moral value to being “busy”. Some people like it and some people don’t, but it winds me up when busy people pretend that their business makes them somehow better

Sometimes we all need to rest. There’s nothing wrong with that.

I am a ‘do-er’ in that I often only feel good about myself if I’m busy. I need to remind myself there is nothing wrong with giving yourself a break sometimes.

So I stayed in bed all morning (DCs with their Dad) and I feel so much better for it. There is no intrinsic value in ‘doing’ just for the sake of it.

Maybe he doesn’t appreciate the need for them because he isn’t working hard enough… Suggest he take on more for a few weeks and he might realise why you would like one

I have a lazy day most weekends and I love it. I've done my child rearing and so now choose to be lazy.

Surely everyone needs a lazy day occasionally if the rest of the time you're running round/working/cleaning etc. In fact, I wouldn't even call it a lazy day, more a rest day!

I love a PJ day. I'm still busy with lots to do around the house but it's nice not to add getting dressed.

I dream of having a day when I can lay in bed, alone, undisturbed watching TV and munching whatever I want.

Duvet days help keep me the right side of sanity

I love a lazy day

No shit. That's the fucking point.

Is your DH Captain Obvious's alter ego?

The whole point of a duvet day is to be lazy, fair enough if it doesn’t appeal but lots of people do enjoy it.

I wonder if your DH had the hump because he thinks your minimising him being ill and implying that he should be enjoying it? Don’t get me wrong, I dislike being ill but I’m also knackered with no chance of vegging out and pleasing myself - when dd was a baby I used to fantasise about needing a night in hospital for something not too serious!

In the context of his comment ‘D’ H was being unreasonable.

You were tired due to doing all the parenting and domestic work while he was ill and were understandably expressing the desire for a rest. Instead of showing consideration or empathy he said something nasty.

And what is he doing whilst recovering? Or is being ill an exception?

It’s ok to have lazy days. In fact it’s better for you to just rest and relax

I gave my teenage son a duvet day off school a few months ago, he was struggling a bit so I decided a mental health Monday was in order. He's never pushed to do it again, so I think it was the right thing to do.

Sometimes enough is enough and you just need a break.