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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this woman should take her dog out of the cafe?

131 replies

MaMaLa321 · 28/01/2022 16:30

So, I'm in a cafe yesterday, eating lunch. Dogs are allowed, which is OK with me, and there are several, sitting quietly by their owners.
Except one, that keeps on doing that piercing high pitched yap, randomly. The owner, every time, looks lovingly at the dog, and says 'shush' . An the dog does it again. And again.
For about 20 minutes, when she finishes her lunch and leaves.
There is outside seating and AIBU to think that she should go outside.

OP posts:
DillDanding · 29/01/2022 20:00

I do not have a problem with dogs in pubs/cafes/John Lewis - anywhere.

My own dog is often with us in pubs etc.

I do however have a problem with them being annoying. A yapping dog is like a whining or crying child. Take it the fuck out.

sessell · 29/01/2022 20:28

I regularly take my dog to cafes. He's completely silent and well behaved. Today woman with yappy dog brings hers over to say 'hello' to mine, exciting him even more. No idea. It's not a dog park! The yapping inside is inappropriate and puts everyone off dogs. It's not on.

Halfabag · 30/01/2022 02:28

Dog friendly means dogs allowed in, not dogs allowed to make as much noise as they like and do what they want and drive away other customers @Treacletoots Not sure any sane business owner would want that Hmm seems most dog owners on this thread would have the decency not to let their dog bark throughout the entire visit, but some seem to think it’s fine Confused

BABAHOTEL · 30/01/2022 03:32

@EmpressCixi

YABU It’s a dog friendly cafe and dogs talk by yapping, if you don’t like it go to one of the thousands of no dogs allowed cafes.
It really is this simple.
Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 07:12

Unfortunately a lot of cafes that didn’t allow dogs around here suddenly do now Sad
I was in a place last week (love the food) and in came a couple with a dog, apparently dogs allowed now.
Not long after in came another couple with a dog and the two dogs started barking loudly at each other to the point my friend and I couldn’t hear each other speak.
Another place off the list sadly.

Youngstreet · 30/01/2022 07:44

Unless pp’s are eating directly off the floor in cafes I don’t see how it’s unhygienic.
I’m allergic to some dogs, I have a dog.
Fortunately I live in France where people are much more accepting of dogs in public spaces. We are very aware of other people though and wouldn’t let her bark continuously.

The most bizarre encounter was in a cafe in England. We sat right near the entrance and put dog between us and the window.
The cafe was almost empty. A woman entered, sat herself at the table nearest to us and then complained that she didn’t like dogs and we should move.
On that occasion we had no sympathy and ignored her.

Random65 · 30/01/2022 08:07

I have enormous dogs and frequently take them out to pubs and cafes. Most of the people we meet are thrilled to meet them and make a fuss of them, even to the point of being rude and interrupting sometimes.
If the owners of the establishment have decided they allow them then it is on them to decide when/if some yapping or barking is too much. Plenty of places that don't allow dogs.
A local posh cafe which allows dogs has a 3 barks and you're out policy, but I've never seen them enforce it. I think they have it just so there's an excuse to kick out dogs they don't like the look of.
My current puppy has been frequently out to pubs and cafes since she was 8 weeks old.

GeneLovesJezebel · 30/01/2022 08:11

It’s a dog friendly cafe so YABU.
No different to a kid kicking off, and I don’t see parents taking them outside to sit in the cold.

Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 08:15

I don’t see why there’s always a comparison between dogs and noisy young children on these threads.
I would expect to find children in a café and I would understand that they couldn’t leave the child at home. It’s not the same thing at all.

Postdatedpandemic · 30/01/2022 08:28

I hate yapping dogs in cafés or pubs. Some small dog owners don't seem to feel the need to train their dogs. Us big dog owners have to train our dogs to behave in a socially acceptable way.

Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 08:47

@Postdatedpandemic

I hate yapping dogs in cafés or pubs. Some small dog owners don't seem to feel the need to train their dogs. Us big dog owners have to train our dogs to behave in a socially acceptable way.
If you could tell the owners of the two big dogs loudly barking to each other in the café I was in last week that would be grand.
SirChenjins · 30/01/2022 09:09

@Postdatedpandemic

I hate yapping dogs in cafés or pubs. Some small dog owners don't seem to feel the need to train their dogs. Us big dog owners have to train our dogs to behave in a socially acceptable way.
Oh give over Grin Perhaps you could ensure that all big dog owners get that memo because there are plenty who obviously haven’t seen it.
BABAHOTEL · 30/01/2022 10:43

@Sparklingbrook

I don’t see why there’s always a comparison between dogs and noisy young children on these threads. I would expect to find children in a café and I would understand that they couldn’t leave the child at home. It’s not the same thing at all.
You would also expect to find dogs in a dog friendly cafe surely?
Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 11:29

You would also expect to find dogs in a dog friendly cafe surely?

I guess so, if you knew it was dog friendly. I had no idea one of my favourites suddenly allowed dogs in until they came in. Sad

There's a local place that does dog afternoon teas, and puppacinos, dog bowls everywhere. I wouldn't go there and I am grateful they advertise it as such so people have choice.

Children can go into any cafe anywhere and have always been able to.

BABAHOTEL · 30/01/2022 11:31

@Sparklingbrook

You would also expect to find dogs in a dog friendly cafe surely?

I guess so, if you knew it was dog friendly. I had no idea one of my favourites suddenly allowed dogs in until they came in. Sad

There's a local place that does dog afternoon teas, and puppacinos, dog bowls everywhere. I wouldn't go there and I am grateful they advertise it as such so people have choice.

Children can go into any cafe anywhere and have always been able to.

They'll have a sign on the door to tell people, otherwise they wouldn't know to go in with their dog. Presumably your favourite cafe would've made this known to attract custom.
Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 11:38

Presumably your favourite cafe would've made this known to attract custom

I would have to go back and look to see if there's any signs, but I'm not going back probably. Maybe people kept coming in with their dogs asking if they could and they made the decision. They do takeaway though so I can still have the nice food so that's good.

I'm not against hospitality trying to increase custom though, they've had a hard time recently. But in gaining the dogs they've probably lost people like me too.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 30/01/2022 11:43

Yapping dogs are annoying but the only way to get your dog used to sitting quietly and calmly in pubs/cafes is to take them and train them, just as you teach small children to sit quietly and calmly.

Yes, you can train calm behaviour at home but the atmosphere in cafes is noisier and there are many more distractions, so I think a bit of noise and disruption is to be expected.

DottyHarmer · 30/01/2022 11:55

I wouldn’t appreciate a yapping dog. But nearly every dog I’ve ever encountered in a pub or cafe has been impeccably behaved. I’m afraid I am in the “big dogs are better behaved” camp Blush . Perhaps one makes more training effort with a bigger dog.

I agree that if you go in a dog-friendly place, you have to expect dogs. We took our lovely dog to a pub billed - outside on the board - as The New Forest’s most dog-friendly pub. Didn’t stop an arseholey couple from glaring and doing theatrical shuddering at our dog who was sleeping under the table.

Sparklingbrook · 30/01/2022 11:59

I think all dog friendly places should have huge signs up so there's no doubt. The place could be lovely and quiet and you're the only one on there but could be joined by a dog at any moment.

I still can't get over dogs being allowed in John Lewis. Don't know how that works in the changing rooms, but you do have to carry them on the escalator. Grin

MrsSkylerWhite · 30/01/2022 12:01

Like dogs, can’t stand yapping. Outside, only fair.

Fromthebirdsnest · 30/01/2022 12:03

I'm quite funny about things like this , we expect our children to be quiet and well behaved in social situations, if our baby crts we quickly deal with it or go outside with said baby , no particularly a huge dog lover either however if it was continuous I'd have politely asked her to take it outside but once or twice is normal dog cafe noise , that's why I wouldn't choose to go to a dog friendly cafe 😉

HunkyPunk · 30/01/2022 12:05

If I went into a ‘dog-friendly’ establishment, I’d assume a high tolerance for dogs from customers. I’m not a dog owner, so wouldn’t seek one out, but wouldn’t particularly avoid, either, so would expect a certain amount of doggy behaviours, like yapping!

emuloc · 30/01/2022 12:13

Yabu for eating in a dog friendly cafe in the first place.

JugglingJanuary · 30/01/2022 12:16

I love dogs, I don't mind the odd proper bark, but god save us from yapping handbag 'dogs'

Dog Friendly is fine, dogs being trained how to behave in cafes, fine. Indulgent owners ignoring Trixie yap yap. NOT fine.

Branleuse · 30/01/2022 12:16

that would absolutely piss me off, especially if id already paid for my food and drinks and couldnt just leave - and im a dog lover

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