Hairdresser Breakup...HELP

[PollyPocket8]

I need help on how to break up with my hairdresser…

I feel like each time I leave I am never really happy with my hair, it’s always ok but I never walk away with that feeling of I absolutely love my hair. I show her pictures of exactly what I like just to make sure what I’m explaining and what I hope for her to achieve line up but unfortunately I still don’t get the outcome I hoped for. It’s difficult because ive gone to her for around 8 years.I think maybe the problem is she is a mobile hairdresser and never in salon so she’s maybe not as up to date with new trends and training. I gave her one last chance this time (in my head) I was really clear and showed her pictures but didn’t get what I was looking for. I made an appointment like I always do but I know that I want to cancel.

So I guess I’m looking for advice on how to cut ties? Do I message and cancel the appointment and say I will message to reschedule but this gives me major guilt or do I say a friend has got me a voucher to try her salon she goes to? I feel like telling her upfront would really hurt her and I don’t want to do that.

Thanks in advance x

You don't have a written contract. If she keeps insisting for appointments I'd tell her the truth (gently!), and tell her you want to try someone else. I'm sure she'll appreciate the honesty!

Thanks everyone for all of your advice, surprised to see how many of us are in the same situation. I still have a few weeks before I can cancel and give her plenty of notice so I will take it all board

I 'broke uo' with hairfresser of 0+ years, he was making clazy erroes and not listeni g. Arrogance and making me ferl nit valued as a customer.

I sent a message to say tryibg sonewhere new and got nothing back, not a thank you for custom of over 20 years at what was £40+ a cut. I was furious. Friends go there too, but feltbthe same so he has lost at leat 5 clients bevause of this.

I ghost them.

Luckily for me I can walk 200yds without tripping over a hairdresser in my area. I have yet to find one I really like though.

I have just recently 'broke up' with mine. I have been going 15 years. I just didn't rebook and she e mailed me to see if I wanted an appointment. I just said I was busy at the moment and did lint know when o would be free. I have now found another one I am more comfortable with and does my hair exactly how I want it x

This will go to 1000 posts very quickly!

*Can't mumsnet give us an edit button

Just say you need to cancel 'as you have a lot on at the moment.' This is good for multiple situations

**numerous not multiple

Are you wearing a mask when she cuts your hair ?
I ask because we are where I go to ( I assume it's the same everywhere , at least til Thursday )
I don't think my hairdresser cuts my hair as well as with one on. Last time it definitely wasn't cut equal on both sides.

It is awkward isn’t it. One day my regular hairdresser was off due to an emergency and one of the other hairdressers stepped in and I preferred the way she did my hair so much that I wanted to continue with her instead but I knew I would feel really awkward seeing the original stylist in the salon with someone else doing my hair. The last laugh was on me though as when they re opened after lockdown only the new stylist was available for appointments and when I asked after the original lady I was told she was only doing her “special” customers and a small part of me felt aggrieved that I clearly wasn’t special enough to make the team! Funny how your mind works. A super get out for me.

'My' hairdresser started doing my hair exactly the same as one of my friends despite me asking specifically for what I wanted. When I challenged him he said, "this style suits you better" and refused to do anything else. I later realised that was the only style he could do!

Looking around the office you could tell who had gone to him. Identikit haircuts.

My sister used to be my hairdresser. Obviously when I fancied a change the British thing to do would have been to fake the deaths of me and my family and emigrate! Really I just rebooked elsewhere, but used the Covid lockdown as the excuse to break the cycle.

Just cancel and block her.

I broke up with my hairdresser a few years back. It got to the point that he wasn’t listening to what I wanted and was just doing his preferred stuff and charging a fortune for extras I hadn’t asked for so I just failed to rebook one day.

I’m now in a similar situation with the eyelash extension lady. Started off well but now they don’t last very long. You’ve given me the push I needed to cancel today and not rebook.

Omg I'm in this situation. Not very good hairdresser and actually I don't even like her that much as a person. However she works for herself and I feel bad about the idea of her losing a client/income if I left. Isn't that bonkers!!

Although I'm loving the idea of suddenly having a niece/cousin who's training to be s hairdresser... this is genius

I regularly used to go to a local hairdresser [shop] - just 5 mins walk away. Suited me as I always asked for an 08:00 appointment so I could get back home early and let DH go off to work after minding our DS.
One morning, as she unlocked the shop, she had a guy with her. She said 'Oh, you don't mind if I just cut 'Fred's' hair first do you?" I did - but agreed as I thought it was a one off.
Then he was there at my next appointment. And got his hair cut before me again.

I found a different hairdresser. What was the point of my 08:00 appointment slot??? Her loss.

For her sake as you've been going so long and so frequently it would be kinder to tell her.

She won't have a hissy fit or a row, it happens all the time. But you are a regular part of her income that's going to stop.

Do it by text if you prefer and lie if you must about going to a relative or something.

But definitely tell her.

Just say at the end of the appointment you won’t book in again this time as you don’t know how you’re fixed, and you’ll be in touch in due course. Then just don’t get in touch.

I can’t really see what your options are other than saying that or having a conversation that goes along the lines of ‘you’re out of date and I don’t love what you do to my hair. So I’m going to see someone else.’

Tell her a family member has recently qualified and will be doing your hair for free!

I have always done the rounds with hairdressers. Every few years a different salon.

I had been going to the same place for over 20 years. I thought they were getting a bit stale and treating me as an identikit woman in her sixties. I used the lockdown to move on to a younger place but I went in to the old place with a bottle of fizz and a thank you card.

Yes just say you fancy going into a salon again for a change and a pamper given the pandemic and you might come back to her at some point … like never!

I get how you feel OP, I’ve been going to my eyelash girl for around 10 years, I’ve not been happy for a while (just due to me having them done for so long, this is my normal look, and I want to come away looking different but I already have the thickest/longish lashes she does rather than she’s just not good at it!!!) I can’t quite do it though, she probably knows me better than anybody and has heard all the ins and outs of my life in that time! I have no advice, but I get it!!

Think we’ve all been there OP! Just cancel & don’t rebook. Say you’ve decided to go back to salons just for a break out of the house.

Mobile hairdressers tend to mainly have older clients and therefore are less modern in their styles.

Ive finally found a hairdresser that actually listens to what I say & doesn’t charge the earth, planning to hang on to her as long as possible! But I’ve had so many that just slap the highlights on without any real care or attention.