Hairdresser never asked how I wanted my hair cut. Just started cutting and chatting.

[Footgoose]

I have Not been to the hairdressers for 2 years. It’s quite forgiving hair being a bit wild and very curly . It was starting to look a bit like a mullet and I wanted my Bob shape back. I Screen shot a few pictures of what I wanted to show the hairdresser.

I met my hair dresser for the first time ever at the door. She introduced me to the lady who was going to do a hair treatment and I went straight to the wash basins. No consultation. Hair washed and seated and my hairdresser appeared from behind and just started cutting and chatting . She was lovely but gave me no chance to say what I actually wanted. I just couldn’t find the right words to say anything that didn’t sound stroppy / shocked/ annoyed so I said nothing . She chatted / chopped/ applied products / dried all without a single question about what I came in for . Hair was finished and admittedly it looked better but no change to the overall shape. Just a bit neater.
I wondered if she perhaps confused me with a regular client with similar hair but the talking was mostly around me being new to the salon .
I never said a word of complaint. Left happy enough because I didn’t want to say anything that sounded like I was being off . Good enough hair cut and treatment but at 120 pounds later ( I bought some products too ) It doesn’t look much different. I was in and out in 50 mins which included a protein treatment . Never had one before so not sure how long it should have taken. It took about 15 mins I think.
Now, I’ve had an email asking for feed back . AIBU to bring up the fact I was never asked what I actually wanted. I don’t want to come across as complaining but I do think I should have had the opportunity to say what kind of cut I hoping for . How would you word it ?
My husband just laughed and said it could only happen to me.

Consultations should always be done first.
Jeez they did a treatment before checking for allergies. Thats a risk on them. What if the treatment had an ingedient in that you were alergic too.
They need to feel the hair and discuss your wants while hair is dry

@NinaDefoe

AutomaticMoon

All this talk about being assertive is annoying me. If people treated others with respect and consideration (and in this case did the job they are being paid to do properly) there would be no need for anyone to assert themselves.

The blame is entirely on the hairdresser who needs a bit more training it seems.
The situation should never have happened.
The OP should never have been put in a situation whereby she had to speak up.

It sounds to me like what the op wanted was described when the booking was originally made, and then relyed to the hair dresser, but it seems the op was expecting to redescribe what they wanted ? At least that's my analysis based on the ops statements.

@WimpoleHat When did this become about what the hairdresser wants? A hairdresser who doesn’t have the wherewithal to even do the most basic part of their job? Completely absurd.

Stop making excuses and grow up

Open your mouth next time and stop drip feeding

@Hawkins001 Hairdressers are meant to do the consultation in person, even for a conditioning treatment they would have to feel the hair first.

@UrsulaBursula 😂 How about you grow up and stop making excuses for the incompetent hairdresser!

[quote AutomaticMoon]@Hawkins001 Hairdressers are meant to do the consultation in person, even for a conditioning treatment they would have to feel the hair first.[/quote]
Fair point, I appreciate the correction.

Reminds me of my last hair cut which I am not still Not Over.

I said I am liking the length (longest its been in a while), but maybe a few layers around the face. Mentioned Jennifer Aniston in Morning Show (not a massive JA fan but we have a very similar hair type).
She then proceeded to get snip happy and took a massive chunk off the front. After saying I liked it longer I now have a stupid wonky short bit at the front.

Was gutted about the hair and also gutted because I liked my hairdresser and wasn't looking to switch and now I have to find someone new!

I am pretty assertive and have spoken up before when not happy, but I totally sympathize with the OP as it can be so awkward to do so in the moment.

@UrsulaBursula

Stop making excuses and grow up

Open your mouth next time and stop drip feeding

That's harsh, and bad manners, you could of at least chosen a more professional way to offer advice.

[quote AutomaticMoon]@UrsulaBursula 😂 How about you grow up and stop making excuses for the incompetent hairdresser![/quote]
Some people, just rude behaviour,

I have never known a hairdresser to not ask what you want. Even my hairdresser who I see every seven weeks asks me how I want it and how's it been. And she always invites me or gives me the opportunity to discuss anything I'm remotely thinking about (before telling me that won't work for my hair. 😡 😂 )
Lots of clients are very nervous to speak up so it's incumbent on the hairdresser to ask. Definitely mention it in the feedback.

@AutomaticMoon

Not criticism of your comment, more of agreement that the person you commented on, was rude

I get you OP. I've done the same. Booked in for a cut and colour. She talked about how I wanted it cut and then went off to sort out the colour. I expected her to come back with the colour chart thingy so I could show her what I wanted. But she came back with a mixed pot of colour and started painting it on. And like a muppet I sat there and said nothing. I had no idea what colour I was getting.

It's odd that they didn't ask, if only to confirm that just wanted it trimmed, but... Yeah, you really need to find your voice. I'm naturally a quiet and even shy person, but I'd have spoken up. Sometimes you have to! If you won't speak for yourself, who will? And it wouldn't have been rude, but even if it had sounded a bit short, so what? I'm sure they get worse than someone politely interrupting to say, "I have some photos of how I'd like my hair cut."

@BringBackCoffeeCreams. 😅 Even when we pick the colour, it doesn't always end up like that. At least mine never seems to. You don't say, but, did you like the colour?

Just to reiterate my point in my OP I don’t want to complain . She was lovely. The products are lovely . Private feed back , not a review, just to say I wasn’t asked what I wanted. Sound like I really have missed the boat tho’ . It’ll look harsh rather than constructive.

You could write your feedback that the hairdresser was simply amazing and knew what I wanted from reading my mind!

I doubt you’re alone with this sort of thing at all. Explain what happened on the feedback form & say it was probably a mistake on both sides. Hopefully they’ll offer you another cut but if not, it’s one of lives lessons to learn.

The last time I went to the hairdresser I got a slightly naff head massage so I worded it as "head massage was okay, would have been better if slightly longer".

@HoneyFlowers. That’s pretty accurate, I might use as it’s passive but not too aggressive . She certainly didn’t do anything horrible . Buts it’s not a Bob either .

@Hawkins001 Aw ty and no worries, thought you might be

I've been going to mine for 14 years every 6 weeks and she still always says "do you want much off?" Or "just the usual?" She never ever assumes what I want. That's so odd. I'd mention it in the feedback.

last time I had an experience like that (long time ago, have a lovely hairdresser now) I told him VERY directly, and with increased volume each time, thay I only wanted one side of my hair done with clippers. I then stood up, moved away from the chair, and asked him what didn't he understand about not using clippers on the back of my head.
Got what I wanted, sort of, he was clearly a crap hairdresser - but if you sit there chatting, don't interrupt and say what you do/don't want - YABU.

@NinaDefoe

The OP shouldn’t need to assert herself/ be assertive. If the hairdresser was half decent he/she would have talked her through the cut before washing her hair and chopping at it. It’s like any profession- some people are crap at their job.

Well yes that's true in theory, but it's also an incredibly passive approach to life and doesn't account for the fact that even good workers are never going to be at their very best every day.

Speaking up and addressing the situation on the spot might have felt awkward and stressful at the time, but it would be all over with now. Instead, she's the proud owner of a haircut she didn't want, and still stressing over it.

They're insane for not asking, extremely unprofessional. But you're even more insane for being such a doormat, so on balance, yabu.