To have an off feeling about him?

[ell06]

I have been seeing a guy for about 8 weeks and at first it was lovely. He was kind and attentive and funny.

I've more or less stayed every weekend since our second date and more and more things are annoying me.

He was showing me videos on his phone and a chat popped down from Snapchat (we'll call her Emma).

I didn't say anything.

I looked at his Instagram and found "Emma", she lives in the same town as him and has an only fans. He follows her personal and her only fans instagrams.

He's liked most half naked photos of her.

I went to the pub with him last weekend and met his friends (they were all lovely and a mix of male and female). His female friends (they've all been friends since secondary school) all said to me that I must be special as they've only met two other girls who were girlfriends and that he's trustworthy and loyal and a genuinely nice person.

We had both had a drink and I saw Emma pop up on his phone again, I asked who she was and he repeated her name like he needed time to think then said "oh she's lovely I'll introduce you" 🤨 hasn't mentioned it since.

I had an op yesterday and came to stay at his last night, he's got a cold, barely asked me how I was feeling and this morning seemed really off going to work.

Little things are annoying me like how he made himself lunch today, sat next to me and ate it and never offered me any, I'd never do this to anyone who was at my house whilst I was eating.

I just have this feeling he's going to end up hurting me and it's a feeling at the pit of my stomach I can't explain. I think it's showing as I'm not myself around him at the minute and honestly I don't know why I keep coming back apart from the fact I like/liked him and who he seemed as a person.

What would you do?

I met a guy on Bumble and looked through his friends list and some random Only Fans accounts were there. Boak.

He was a twat in other ways and this affirmed it for me. No respect for me but I suspect it was just woman in general.

@ell06

Thank you everyone

I completely get where you are all coming from and I think you're right about boundaries and my level of confidence and self worth is on the floor.

I won't be seeing him again that's for sure and luckily I have the next few weekends planned with girlfriends.

Glad you are OK 💐

Only 8 weeks and we went to stay at his to recover? The reason why he didn't offer you lunch because he didn't want you there. What did you eat? Did you stay hungry? Did he invite you to his to recover or did you just turn up?

@UnshakenNeedsStirring

Only 8 weeks and we went to stay at his to recover? The reason why he didn't offer you lunch because he didn't want you there. What did you eat? Did you stay hungry? Did he invite you to his to recover or did you just turn up?

This is all asides the point now.

Shes left the situation and breaking up with him. I think she has got enough of a fright - she does not need a post mortem of the situation.

@ell06

Thank you everyone

I completely get where you are all coming from and I think you're right about boundaries and my level of confidence and self worth is on the floor.

I won't be seeing him again that's for sure and luckily I have the next few weekends planned with girlfriends.

You made the right decision, he sounds a selfish boy, playing play station alone would make me run for the hills 😆

Get well soon and stay away from him

It was lovely to read your update OP. I know that pit of the stomach feeling. Getting up and leaving is hard but you did it.

If your self esteem were truly on the floor you would have stayed. Chalk it up to a learning experience and have a lovely time with your friends. I’m so happy for you.

Random woman popping up on his phone.
Making lunch without offering you any.
Asking you what you were going to cook for dinner in his house.

Any one of those would be a dealbreaker for me.

At the end of the day, would you treat someone like this? No, so you shouldn't accept that behaviour because it 100% means that you are not on the same page. Don't question him. Don't ruminate on the whys and wherefores. Don't explain yourself. Just let him go.

Raise your bar. The right one is out there somewhere and you won't find him while you are putting up with crap.

ALWAYS trust your instincts.they keep you safe.
Move on.

Red flags all over the shop!!

Total weirdo turning the lights on at 0500. So glad you're back home and away from this knobhead. It's like he's been really pass-agg about you being there after having insisted you come.

Glad you're home OP.

Was he surprised when you said you were going home?

@UnshakenNeedsStirring maybe read the thread before asking questions that the OP has already answered

It's moving too quick.

BUT I think that it might not be a bad thing in this case, he's shown you who he is.

Walk away.

@Fatherliamdeliverance

Total weirdo turning the lights on at 0500. So glad you're back home and away from this knobhead. It's like he's been really pass-agg about you being there after having insisted you come.

He was probably testing the OP to see how much shit she would put up with.

Well done OP, have a nice Sunday and I hope you have a speedy recovery from both your operation and this waste of space.

@Freecuthbert

I wouldn't want to date someone who follows only fans accounts.

Me either. That alone would be enough to give me the ick.

Does he know he's dumped yet 😂
I don't blame you, he sounds really inconsiderate by not doing a good job of looking after you and that only fans girl, he's trouble and it would only get worse over time with him.