Quite cross

[GrannyGoggles]

I would like to buy something quite extravagant which I don’t need. I can afford it. Our adult children will enjoy it too. We have room to store it.

I have asked my husband to look at choosing the specification, as a) he’s competent at such things and b) historically if I’ve made such a purchase without consulting it’s resulted in a massive sulk.

His verdict is that we don’t need it, it’s expensive and extravagant.

Unlike the ride on lawnmower that’s awaiting delivery? His most recent 4 wheel drive? The machine that’s on order for ‘our’ (his) business that IMO is entirely unnecessary?

I’m quite cross

What is it? Buy it without his help.
I love how you said "quite cross", not a term you come across much these days!

I think it's a luxurious built in top of the range hot tub

I'd buy 2 and make him wait in for delivery

Sauna

Green house

What's so confusing about the specs that you can't figure it out yourself? Compare the specs across different models of the same item and cross reference with Google and reviews.

Is it a puppet show like the one in the Sound of Music

Did he ask your opinion and permission to buy his “toys”? If not then what is stopping you from buying the item which your family is going to benefit from and enjoy?

Were it not for being 'quite cross', I'd have thought the item was a hot tub. But the two sit uneasily in the same sentence.

Need? We have so much we don't need. Since when is he the chief of what you 'need'?

Please tell us what it is! A folding hot tub?

The c9nversation would go something like

Him: we don’t need it
Me: we don’t need a ride on mower and I want this, it will get a lot of use, unlike the mower that wont be used for 6 months of the year, now what spec do we need?

If he states again
Him: we don’t need it
Me: I want it, if you are not going to help I will speak to xx friend/child/buy what I think

Pelaton is my guess!

Hot tub?

@TheMarmaladeYears

Were it not for being 'quite cross', I'd have thought the item was a hot tub. But the two sit uneasily in the same sentence.

😆

It's 2022 not 1922. You can afford it so buy it.

Assuming it’s not an animal , just revisit the conversation but instead of saying can I just say I am buying x , which do you think would work better . That is if you actually do want his input , if you don’t then just buy it .

I reserve raging and incandescence for Johnson, not my husband who is v old and v lovely. The 1950s comments are on the money, to his credit he is well aware and works on this.

I do not need his permission, but would prefer discussion and good will. Thought it could have been a pleasant activity on a dull January afternoon.

I almost certainly will go ahead and he will end up thinking it’s a good thing … if a little extravagant

Thank you for making me smile -
it’s a Green Egg

I thought this was going to be about alternatives to ‘absolutely livid’, which most of mumsnet is most of the time.

Buy the thing. Look online for which one suits your needs, someone will have started a discussion about it.

I don't blame you OP, I would be vexed as well.

Just go 'look John I really want a hot tub and I think the kids would like it, so I'm going to get one regardless, but I'd rather you had an input and we could choose one we both feel happy with'. Then it's up to him.

It depends what it is.

The examples you’ve given are quite practical things.

If you can afford it though then why not. What’s the point in having loads of money if you can’t spend it.

Just buy the one you want.

You’ve mentioned it to him now which is plenty - seemingly more than he did re his purchases!

@3luckystars

If you split up it will cost him a lot more. We could probably help.

Is it a huge inflatable tent?

Oh get the egg! The biggest one you can afford

I've changed my mind now that you've said what it is. But that's because I loathe barbecues.....