Thank yous for presents

[motherofcatsandbears]

Not sure if I’m being old fashioned, but I’m feeling a bit peed off.
We have a young family living nearby and always give the little ones Christmas presents (about £15 per child).

The parents thank us when we drop the presents off, but we have never received a word of thanks, either by a little card, FB message or even a knock on the door.
I personally thank someone either by telephone, text or email as soon as I’ve opened my presents - is it now the done thing to not say a word of thanks?
I don’t think I will be giving them gifts any more due to this.

Magpie wife .can you not just get a thank you card? Just sign and a few words surely .no need to take all spare time !

@RomeosGone

Yep, I was the full time working mother with four children at different schools, variety of activities, pets to look after etc and if I managed to find time to think, buy, wrap, and post or deliver a bloody present then I think the recipient or parents can find time to write a note to say thank you.
So so sad to see the casual dismissal of basic good manners.
I have stopped sending presents to various young people, such as god children, as I never got a Thankyou.

My godchildren knew from an early age the better the thank you notes the better the gift.

Wow. That’s appalling.

I knew someone would think it's appalling!!' It's a joke between us!

My rule is if it is a one-sided gift giving event (birthday, new baby, congratulations etc) then I do thank you notes or at the very least a whatsapp message.

If it's Christmas then I don't. Otherwise there would be thank you cards flying in all directions. If I sent and received thank you cards for every gift given or received by myself, DH and two DDs this Christmas we'd be talking 50+ cards which is ridiculous. We said thank you when the gift was received, not opened. That is enough.

Nor do I expect thank you cards from anyone for their Christmas presents and come to think about it, I've never received one? It never even crossed my mind that people would expect one either. I was brought up to always send thank you notes, but never at Christmas?

Also, why is it only kids who are expected to give thank you cards? I gave my second husband DPD driver a case of beer for Christmas, should I have expected him to send me a thank you card when he cracked one open?

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

I just don't see the need to do that at all

“All that”?! You mean send a 30 second thank you text or something to show appreciation for the amount of effort someone put into selecting a gift for you? Manners cost nothing

But that's not what I said

I said "I don't see the need to that at all". - as in, I don't see the need to thank someone who has already been thanked.

If you're going to jump on someone, at least read their post properly

You were thanked when you dropped them off, it’s weird to expect a second thank you.

I knew someone would think it's appalling!!' It's a joke between us!

You didn’t express that it was a joke in your original post nor can you judge tone in writing and there was no exclamation points on my end tbh, a simple statement. It read (at least to me) that you were grading children and basing your gift to them out of the standard of their previous thank you, based on your standards. If that’s not the case, simple mistake on my part.

Theredjellybean yes my husb says he not sending money. It is never acknowledged. I feel same on it. Age group mid 20s

The parents thank us when we drop the presents off, but we have never received a word of thanks

I'm confused. How many times do we have to say thankyou?

@Suzanne999

This is my pet peeve. I do the two year rule. Recipient ( or their parent if a child) doesn’t thank me 2 years in a row, no more gifts.

Totally do the same. It takes nothing for an adult to take a picture of child playing with or wearing present at the very least. I used to send my nephews and nieces £50 cash for birthdays, but don’t bother anymore. Never got a thank you, so it obviously didn’t mean a lot to them. I just give a bit more to charity now. Don’t have any kids ourselves, they are going to be very disappointed when we cark it as well. The sale of our two properties will be going to charity…

Thank-you cards are odd these days IMO. I certainly wouldn’t want or expect one.

I do what PP does & take a pic of the children opening it & say Thank-you via WhatsApp or Fb messenger.

You sound like you don’t really have a relationship with the children so maybe don’t do presents again?

Text is fine. We get zero acknowledgement so thats my gripe.

I don't expect thank you cards but was a bit sad my siblings in law (two sets) didn't even acknowledge receipt of kids gifts we sent. A text would have been nice. They didn't send us Xmas cards either :(
Maybe they don't want us to bother.