... to think that all adult women have experienced male harassment?

[ravenmum]

Is it unreasonable of me to assume that by the age of 18, all women will have had personal experience of a man or men harassing them with unwelcome behaviour as defined by the UN:

"Sexual harassment includes many things...
• Actual or attempted rape or sexual assault.
• Unwanted pressure for sexual favors.
• Unwanted deliberate touching, leaning over, cornering, or pinching.
• Unwanted sexual looks or gestures.
• Unwanted letters, telephone calls, or materials of a sexual nature.
• Unwanted pressure for dates.
• Unwanted sexual teasing, jokes, remarks, or questions.
• Referring to an adult as a girl, hunk, doll, babe, or honey.
• Whistling at someone.
• Cat calls.
• Sexual comments.
• Turning work discussions to sexual topics.
• Sexual innuendos or stories.
• Asking about sexual fantasies, preferences, or history.
• Personal questions about social or sexual life.
• Sexual comments about a person's clothing, anatomy, or looks.
• Kissing sounds, howling, and smacking lips.
• Telling lies or spreading rumors about a person's personal sex life.
• Unwanted pressure for dates.
• Unwanted sexual teasing, jokes, remarks, or questions.
• Referring to an adult as a girl, hunk, doll, babe, or honey.
• Whistling at someone.
• Cat calls.
• Sexual comments.
• Turning work discussions to sexual topics.
• Sexual innuendos or stories.
• Asking about sexual fantasies, preferences, or history.
• Personal questions about social or sexual life.
• Sexual comments about a person's clothing, anatomy, or looks.
• Kissing sounds, howling, and smacking lips.
• Telling lies or spreading rumors about a person's personal sex life.
• Neck massage.
• Touching an employee's clothing, hair, or body.
• Giving personal gifts.
• Hanging around a person.
• Hugging, kissing, patting, or stroking.
• Touching or rubbing oneself sexually around another person.
• Standing close or brushing up against a person.
• Looking a person up and down.
• Staring at someone.
• Sexually suggestive signals.
• Facial expressions, winking, throwing kisses, or licking lips.
• Making sexual gestures with hands or through body movements."
www.un.org/womenwatch/osagi/pdf/whatissh.pdf

YABU: I am a woman aged 18 or over and have never personally experienced any unwelcome behaviour of this kind.

YANBU: I am a woman aged 18 or over and have personally experienced unwelcome behaviour of this kind.

YANBU

I will be amazed if there is a woman alive who has not experienced at least one of these

YANBU but there'll be people along shortly to remind you that NAMALT, women are just as bad, and that saying negative things like this upsets the many nice men out there.

Sigh.

Yes I use to all the time but since getting fat I don’t experience anything at all now

YANBU!

For me, it lasted from age 11 to about 50. It's almost a relief to get old

I am a 27 year old female and I have no experience of any of the behaviour on that list. I know it does happen but so far I haven’t been on the receiving end of it

@SpaceSmudge

I am a 27 year old female and I have no experience of any of the behaviour on that list. I know it does happen but so far I haven’t been on the receiving end of it

You are very, very, very unusual and if you are who you say you are, I would bet my house that you simply haven't noticed it.

I've seen you before on customer service threads, think of how male customers speak to you when they're complaining and how they act vs how they speak to/act with a male member of staff.

Nope, late 30s and no issues here. Men were always lovely on dates etc, no issues at work or elsewhere

Absolutely YANBU. Well before 18 in most cases too I’d say.

The only experience of the behaviour on that list that I have, has come from other women.

Who had "women are just as bad" on their misogyny bingo card...?

@SpaceSmudge

I am a 27 year old female and I have no experience of any of the behaviour on that list. I know it does happen but so far I haven’t been on the receiving end of it

I don't believe that for one second. I would be good money that you've just never even noticed it happening.

I suspect that pretty much all women experience at least one thing on that list on a daily basis, and have done since they were about 12.

@Hospedia

Who had "women are just as bad" on their misogyny bingo card...?

Sexual harassment is a joke to you now is it?

I have a daughter (24) and a son (22) and wonder if I should have talked about this more openly while they were still at home. They have both worked out how the world is by now on their own, obviously. My son said a couple of days ago that he hadn't realised quite how much unwelcome attention women get until a conversation recently with a couple of female friends about how many strangers proposition them every month on Facebook. We had talked about the MeToo movement when it came out, but I guess it hits home more when it's your friends and not just your parents lecturing you.

Yes but now I’m in my Forties and a bit more spherically challenged it hasn’t happens for a while.

@Peas252

The only experience of the behaviour on that list that I have, has come from other women.

Bullshit!

I think any woman that says she hasn't experienced at least one thing on that list just hasn't realised. Society conditions us to let men get away with so much that some of the more minor things don't even register.

@lucillelarusso

Sexual harassment is a joke to you now is it?

Of course it isn't however the thread is about women experiencing unwanted attention and harassment from men and right away - page one of the thread - is the usual deflection about women being just as bad.

I'm sorry for whatever has happened to you, no one should be harassed.

@Peas252

The only experience of the behaviour on that list that I have, has come from other women.

You mean you've heard about it second-hand, from other women, but not had anyone wolf whistle at you etc. in person?

I think I've probably experienced everything on that list many multiple times.
A recent conversation between dd (18) and I told me all of her female friends had experienced a lot of these behaviours over the past 6/7 years. It's quite sickening when you think about it. 11/12 yo should not be dealing with this crap, I mean no one should but those young girls have no idea how to defend or protect themselves from this.

Fortunately, very very infrequently - I think I have a sign on my forehead which says "don't even think about it". But several things on that list have happened to me, fortunately nothing very serious.

I’m in my 60s and have experienced every one of those things on the list. It was all unwelcome. Ageing has its compensations, I enjoy being invisible these days.