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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

If i was single would you xx

91 replies

ShakeysGirl · 22/12/2007 16:06

This is a message dp has sent to someone one Facebook. I am fuming, i just called him and asked him why hes asked some girl this. He laughed am i being unreasonable to want to chop his nuts off?

OP posts:
NAB3hundredbaubles · 22/12/2007 16:06

I think this guy causes you far too much trouble to be worth it imho.

bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 16:10

Was it on his Wall or an email? I wouldn't tolerate it myself but I am a bit like Attila the Hun at the moment .

WanderingHolly · 22/12/2007 16:11

Message the girl.

"He's not.
I have.
You shouldn't."

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 22/12/2007 16:11

I would be v v annoyed at the message, and his reaction to you. Not acceptable at all.

moljam · 22/12/2007 16:11

id be fuming.my dh isnt a saint either.id be really angry that he just laughed too-not funny at all.

merrylissiemas · 22/12/2007 16:11

no YANBU! id be furious.

AimsmumPaPumPumMeAndMyDrum · 22/12/2007 16:13

I would be fuming at this too, but more so at his reaction!!

Magrat · 22/12/2007 16:13

I'd be livid

bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 16:17

Shall we all message the girl on Facebook? [devil icon]

ShakeysGirl · 22/12/2007 16:21

It was in a private message to her. To her credit she has told him he's not single and shouldn't be asking. He's on saint but has a hell of alot of good qualities. I just tried to call him again because he just had a call on his work phone asking him to work tonight. He didn't answer so has in effect lost £120 tough luck. He is shopping for my christmas present. It had better be bloody good. Will hit the roof as soon as he walks through to door

OP posts:
bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 16:32

No Christmas present, however good, is worth it if he's playing around on FB. Lets hope it was a one-off.

Rookietherednosedreindeer · 22/12/2007 16:34

If it were me I'd be letting him know the minute he got through the door that he was indeed single and could do what he wanted from now on.

I don't think this is the type of thing that can be excused by being "a bit of a rogue", he is effectively trying to have an online relationship with someone else. Does he know the girl, how did he come across her details ?

The internet is such a dangerous place for relationships to my mind its no different to him saying it to someone face to face.

Sorry to be so blunt, its your relationship after all, I'm just saying that I wouldn't put up with it

SpacecadetLovesChristmas · 22/12/2007 16:38

not acceptable Im afraid..the bloke is playing you for a fool because he assumed you wouldnt find out..what if the girl had messaged back that she was interested..what would he have done then?

AimsmumPaPumPumMeAndMyDrum · 22/12/2007 16:43

Is it someone he knows, or a random stranger?

bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 16:46

Out of interest, how did you have access to his FB account?

ShakeysGirl · 22/12/2007 17:07

I'm uploading photos for him at his request. Not only is he two faced, it seems hes also stupid Shes on his friends list so i'm assuming shes someone he knows/knew.

Hes updated his status now via his mobile to say hes very sorry he hurt me and he loves me blah blah blah. His usual thing when he knows i'm upset.

He called and said he was drunk when he sent it - but I was sat right next o him at the time.

Arse.

Well this may just be the straw that broke the I've had enough. I'm getting Christmas out of the way and then hes gone.

And it's ot the first time. Hes sent messages to someone we both know asking to be her secret admirer or something and saying shes gorgeous. I stamped on that one and gave him another chance. Which makes hundreds of chances in total.

Im done being the idiot in the rose tinted glasses.

OP posts:
NAB3hundredbaubles · 22/12/2007 17:11

You communicate via the computer.

His mother dictates his life for him.

He has you doing errands for you and he laughs in your face when he upsets you.

He ignores the phone when you ring him and you know it will be your fault he has lost that work, don't you?

What is wrong that makes you think you deserve this shit? Get shot now. Don't wait until after Christmas. I doubt he has bought you anything amazing and nothing is worth this crap. Get rid. Now.

bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 17:11

I'd be tempted to do a lot more than upload pics to his FB account if I had access to it and he'd admitted mucking about on there .

Octo · 22/12/2007 17:12

oh dear - once again the internet screws up another family I feel for you and hope that you can get past his total stupidity if it really was just a mistake.

Octo · 22/12/2007 17:13

ooh blimey NAB3 - think there I things I missed here ...

bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 17:15

Shakey - are you dating one of my exes??

ShakeysGirl · 22/12/2007 17:20

We don't comunicate via the computer, we live together. It's him communicating with the rest of the female population thats the problem

He is a pita. Like an extra child. His mother is a nightmare. And he thinks i'm his PA when it comes to work.

But he is also loving, affectionate, romantic, sensitive (he is in bits now and keeps phoning to tell me hes sorry and that he loves me) hes witty, taleted, popular, sweet and great with the kids. He brings me cups of tea in bed.

Hes stupid, he sees this sort of thing as a bit of fun. I don't. And even thought the great stuff origionally outweighs the bad, the bad stuff adds up until it is equal to the great and then slowly starts to overtake iyswim.

Have told him that he needs to get his immature backside back home asap if he wants any chance of even holding a conversation with me let alone a relationship. Hes done well to be in a relationship this long (a year) its his longest ever. I know why!

I did tell him about the job. I was spiting myself otherwise. We need the money.

Can someone please send me a back bone for christmas!

OP posts:
bookofchristmascarolsmum · 22/12/2007 17:22

It's not "fun" if it's upsetting you!!

Octo · 22/12/2007 17:22

Okay then - ditch him and have a nice christmas with your family - I've had infections for longer!

Octo · 22/12/2007 17:23

Sorry - slightly flippant and haven;t ever had an infection for that long - but he sounds very immature and dumping him may be the only way forward.

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