To think my friend is overstepping boundaries with my family

[Singingtherapy]

One of my closest friends is someone I've known since primary school, we're now in our 50s. She's lovely and we're incredibly close. But the one thing she does that seriously winds me up is treating my family as her own friends, independently of me. Two recent examples.

1. a few months ago she was at my house at the same time as my mum. My mum mentioned that she and my dad were getting tickets to a show at a local theatre and suggested we all go. I said I couldn't as I had other arrangements so that was the end of the conversation. Then a few days later my friend texted me to say that she was going to the show with my mum and her own mum. She'd called my mum and arranged for them to all go together.
2. She thought my brother might be the best person to help her with a project she was doing at work. He does similar work to her. Again she just randomly texted me to say she had called him and arranged to take him out for lunch to discuss it. She knew him years ago but they're not in contact. AIBU to think that socialising with the immediate family of your close friends should only happen if the friend is included?

I think that would be lovely 🥰 my best friend and my family get on but they’re so different they’d never spend time together. If they had similar interests though I would absolutely love it if they hung out together. What a lovely thought. I think you’re being a bit unreasonable.

YABVU

She sounds like a lovely friend and in all honestly this post makes you sound terrible. It's fine! Be grateful for the friendship you have.

She's known your mum 40 years. She is practically family. You're being ridiculous.

She's accepted she was being unreasonable.

Does she really need another 100 people to tell her that?

YABU. Hugely. My best friend often meets my sister for a coffee without me because they live near each other. Why shouldn't they be friends?

You friend sounds so lovely. I wish I had a friend that felt that comfortable with my family. She sounds more like a sister to me.

You’re not thinking logically. How would their “work talk” lunch have worked if you had tagged along?

And with the theatre tickets it sounds like the invitation was casually made to both of you, it was just you who couldn’t go. You seem to have not appreciated that seeing the show might have been a big part of the attraction, not necessarily the socialising side.

This is normal. You sound jealous/controlling