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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to not like drag Queens?

999 replies

Draggedalong1 · 01/01/2022 12:04

And why don’t I? To me there is something intimidating and scary in the make up, and harsh glamour, parodied until it’s ugly and I think, aggressive. I remember going to drag shows long again in the 90s and they seemed to be a bit of fun and almost innocent compared to whatever it is about ru Paul et al. Nothing wrong with a bit of dame Edna from what I remember as a kid. What’s the reasoning behind this new style I wonder, and aibu?

OP posts:
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5
JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 14:44

@WorriedMumsDontSleep I think it's the voice altering that freaks me out. I never minded Lily Savage but people like Dick Emery scared me when I was little.

Jellykat · 01/01/2022 14:44

So if the majority on here dislike drag queens because they view them as misogynists, where do female drag queens fit in???

2Gen · 01/01/2022 14:44

YANBU, I've begun to be creeped out by them too! I used to like Danny La Rue when I was a kid, found panto dames and Dame Edna funny but these new ones are more like scary clowns, seeming to be making caricatures of us women with the extreme and over-exaggerated effeminacy, to the point of almost taking the piss out of us, which is not funny at all and stinks of a very insidious and sinister type of misogyny!
The way they recently decided they want small children as audiences in the "Drag Queen Story Hours" is even more deeply disturbing and, when it turns out some of the are actual sex offenders and child molesters, actually makes me feel sick and boils my blood! I can't fathom why anyone would take their child to such an event; they must be very naive!

SarahBellam · 01/01/2022 14:44

Yeah, they kind of creep me out too - always have, even pantomime dames when I was a kid. It does feel like they are mocking women by parodying them and exaggerating clothing and gestures in some sort of grotesque caricature of what it means to be female. It’s one of the reasons Mrs Brown’s Boys gives me the ick.

nojudgementhere · 01/01/2022 14:46

@Notimeforaname

My gay BIL told me that every drag queen he knew was very aggressive

That's really unfortunate he's met so many bad people.

A friend of mine once said every doctor they had ever met spoke down to them and demeaned them.
I could never think all doctors are like that but often wonder was it just a coincidence they had met so many unpleasant doctors or was it friends perception of doctors that made them feel they were all awful...🤔

Yeah, maybe he was giving off a bit of an unfriendly vibe or was just unlucky? The ones I met were actually really soft-hearted when you got to know them a bit. They'd have quite a tough exterior (probably due to the fact they'd get quite a bit of abuse) but when they trusted you would go out of their way to look out for you and were great company. I try to not judge people before I get to know them or generalise as I think most people have a good side if you give them a chance!
JacquelineCarlyle · 01/01/2022 14:47

@Motherdare

They are disgusting and offensive. How this is allowed but black-face isn’t I do not know. Oh yes, I do. Misogyny isn’t a hate crime when everything else is. Women are easy targets and we are supposed to laugh along with this mockery or be accused of being uptight and humourless.
Completely agree with this (& everyone who has said similar).
endofbluenight · 01/01/2022 14:47

Don't know much about the drag scene tbh. The only bit I am aware of is that miming to songs thing, and I fail to see how watching someone miming to a song is entertaining. Let alone entertaining enough for me to pay money for.
But that's a personal preference in leisure pursuits Grin

2Gen · 01/01/2022 14:47

@Jellykat

So if the majority on here dislike drag queens because they view them as misogynists, where do female drag queens fit in???
I thought they were called "drag KINGS"? TBH, I don't like them much either but they don't disturb me nor piss me off the way the new drag queens do!
JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 14:48

Well @Notimeforaname I have met a lot of useless doctors in my time!

Coconuttts · 01/01/2022 14:50

A man lip syncing in a dress and make-up doesn't cause me offence. But it offends me to hear the term "fishy", etc. But not all drag artists behave like that.

heathspeedwell · 01/01/2022 14:51

There's also the unfortunate aspect that some people are so desperate to appear 'inclusive' that they think if a man wears a dress then he must somehow be less dangerous than other men.

Sadly there have been a few instances of drag queens abusing children that have made headlines.

Snorkmaidenn · 01/01/2022 14:52

@amnm

Drag queens aren't men dressing up as women. It's (mostly) men dressing deliberately in a way that goes against the gender norms imposed on men as a way of rebelling against society.

The queens on stage aren't pretending they're women.

So are they called "queens", a female term and wear women's clothes? HmmConfused
Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 14:54

nojudgementhere

You definitely live up to your name Smile

Yep agree there are lovely people... and absolute pricks everywhere. Regardless of their chosen profession or Interests.

Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 14:56

Sadly there have been a few instances of drag queens abusing children that have made headlines

Its everywhere. I'm not surprised. People from all walks of life are guilty of it. So sad.

WorriedMumsDontSleep · 01/01/2022 14:57

. I try to not judge people before I get to know them or generalise as I think most people have a good side if you give them a chance!

I tend to have a healthy level of scepticism about everybody. Stranger Danger relies on us not being too trusting. Women and children are done no harm by exercising a little caution.

AfterEightMintyCedric · 01/01/2022 14:58

I have nothing against drag as an art form/entertainment, but for me it's an adult form of entertainment.

What's really pressing my buttons is the need of the wokerati to shoehorn it into family entertainment/kids TV/reading time at the library etc.

Hankunamatata · 01/01/2022 14:58

Was a bit like that until watched Drag Race. The skills and transformations are amazing.

WomanStillNotAFeeling · 01/01/2022 14:59

Current drag is so offensive and a long way from Lily Savage.

I’m pro choice and find drag ‘queens’ mocking abortion and miss carriages distressing, it shows how unaware they are of the impact on female bodies.

The names implying women smell fishy are grotesque as is the hyper sexualisation.

Lily Savage was an act that at the heart of it respected and women and saw their strength rather than the current acts that demean women.

Jellykat · 01/01/2022 15:01

Queens can dress up as women or not, i've met some well butch queens.. and i've also called some women 'a right princess' or 'Queen Bee', its a pretty loose term Snorkmaidenn.. its the drag part of the phrase that some deem the problem, not necessarily the term 'queen' surely?

StopStartStop · 01/01/2022 15:02

Drag queens. men in womanface, demonstrate their hatred of women. As many previous posters have said.

Misogyny isn't a hate crime because most men would find themselves on the wrong side of the law! It's something to work towards, though. Might make them think a bit.

Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 15:03

I try to not judge people before I get to know them or generalise as I think most people have a good side if you give them a chance!

I tend to have a healthy level of scepticism about everybody. Stranger Danger relies on us not being too trusting. Women and children are done no harm by exercising a little caution.

Both of these are true for me.

I always give a chance but always exercise caution with whomever I meet whether they're man,woman or animal.
There are people everywhere looking to take advantage of others. Likewise there are many lovely souls who care deeply about others. For most of those people, profession or personal interests doesn't determine how kind or cruel they are.

JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 15:04

Lily Savage was an act that at the heart of it respected and women and saw their strength rather than the current acts that demean women.
True @WomanStillNotAFeeling

JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 15:04

Sorry bold fail Hmm

PeeAche · 01/01/2022 15:05

I couldn't agree more. I've been told I'm bigoted because they fall under the protective sphere of LGBTQ+. I actually think it is offensive to both women and transwomen alike. Womanface, transwomanface. I just think that in another 30 years, we will look back on this era and be shocked that it was entertainment.

Coupled with this, I find them unpleasant to look at. For anyone else that experiences this displeasure and can't quite understand why Google "uncanny valley".

They're well and truly in mine.

nojudgementhere · 01/01/2022 15:06

@WorriedMumsDontSleep

. I try to not judge people before I get to know them or generalise as I think most people have a good side if you give them a chance!

I tend to have a healthy level of scepticism about everybody. Stranger Danger relies on us not being too trusting. Women and children are done no harm by exercising a little caution.

No, I totally get where you're coming from but I think you can still be friendly and give people a chance without placing yourself in a dangerous situation. Some of the scariest and most toxic people I've met have looked like classic boys next door on the surface but turned out to have horrible tempers/jealousy issues. In my experience you can't always judge a book by its cover!