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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu to not like drag Queens?

999 replies

Draggedalong1 · 01/01/2022 12:04

And why don’t I? To me there is something intimidating and scary in the make up, and harsh glamour, parodied until it’s ugly and I think, aggressive. I remember going to drag shows long again in the 90s and they seemed to be a bit of fun and almost innocent compared to whatever it is about ru Paul et al. Nothing wrong with a bit of dame Edna from what I remember as a kid. What’s the reasoning behind this new style I wonder, and aibu?

OP posts:

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QueeniesCroft · 01/01/2022 14:14

I can see the attraction of being able to perform and dress in ways which don't conform to rigid male stereotypes. I can see the freedom in that. And I have seen drag acts which were funny and entertaining without any underlying spite, but in many there seems to be a sort of viciousness (which unsurprisingly isn't aimed at men).

gluteustothemaximus · 01/01/2022 14:15

It's vile. They are vile.

But a conversation at work was so guarded between everyone, they thought they had to like it, so as not to come across as something ending in phobic.

Fucks sake.

Drag Queen's reading to children in schools. WHY?????

furbabymama87 · 01/01/2022 14:15

I find them creepy and nasty but I don't dislike them from a feminist viewpoint. It's just not something I personally enjoy watching.

AlfonsoTheGoat · 01/01/2022 14:16

YANBU. I hate the whole drag queen thing with a passion.

TheOldStar · 01/01/2022 14:18

I have been thinking this since seeing a drag act on telly last night. I really don’t like it and don’t understand why some women fawn over them.

Rubyupbeat · 01/01/2022 14:18

12:11MaryAndHerNet

There was a time Al Jolson was popular for doing black face.
Drag is woman face and one day I hope it'll be as offensive as black face is now.

And Al Johnson did so much for black actors and musicians at the time, by going blackface, there was a rhyme and a reason he did this. He campaigned for equality for black people in theatre, films and music.
Drag is an art in itself, offensive to women...nah, don't think so, only those out to find a problem with most things.

nojudgementhere · 01/01/2022 14:19

I used to go out clubbing alot when I was younger and got to know quite a few drag queens. They were some of the kindest and funniest people I've met.

Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 14:19

That is not what I said. Drag queens are men, are they not? Women are at risk from men. Men, for the most part, are not at risk from women

I love drag that's all I'm saying. On a thread that was asking about liking drag.
For me its nothing about men and women , its performers.
I get lots of people hate it. Totally fine not to like something someone else does.
But it's true it wont be going anywhere, not for the time being anyway.

RantyAunty · 01/01/2022 14:20

@Motherdare

They are disgusting and offensive. How this is allowed but black-face isn’t I do not know. Oh yes, I do. Misogyny isn’t a hate crime when everything else is. Women are easy targets and we are supposed to laugh along with this mockery or be accused of being uptight and humourless.

This is how I feel about all of it.

Misogyny 100% should be a hate crime. The violent outbursts, insults, assaults, all of it.

I know that making black face offensive and taboo doesn't erase people's racism but it's a start in black people not being some parody or joke and to cringe and be disgusted when you see it.

I hope one day people will cringe and be disgusted about things done to women.

SueSaid · 01/01/2022 14:21

'But a conversation at work was so guarded between everyone, they thought they had to like it, so as not to come across as something ending in phobic.'

Yes it is very bizarre. If they want to be crap outdated 'entertainers' in clubs that is bad enough but this creeping into society as if they are something to be respected and revered is very fucked up.

SocialConnection · 01/01/2022 14:22

I find a lot of the culture very unpleasant. The grotesque makeup, fake body parts, creepy names etc. Is it envy, hate of what they can't be? An uneasy mix to produce that much parody.

And a couple of definitions - fishy, and the big pink furry box. 🤔

VioletLemon · 01/01/2022 14:23

YANBU I can't fucking stand drag Queens. Very unpopular opinion perhaps but I think it's a form of mysogyny. Big business now I understand and a form of entertainment but I can't see how it's any different to David Walliams fanning up on Little Britain then having to apologise.... Easy way to portray women as aggressive, bitchy nymphos. Sooner drag is cancelled the better.

Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 14:26

Easy way to portray women as aggressive, bitchy nymphos
Thats what I thought when I tried to watch an episode of love island! 🤣

VestofAbsurdity · 01/01/2022 14:27

But it's true it wont be going anywhere, not for the time being anyway.

No, it probably won't unfortunately as ridiculing, demeaning and being nasty, spiteful and abusive towards and about women is always in fashion.

JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 14:28

They're really scary to me.

JaneJeffer · 01/01/2022 14:29

@nojudgementhere

I used to go out clubbing alot when I was younger and got to know quite a few drag queens. They were some of the kindest and funniest people I've met.

My gay BIL told me that every drag queen he knew was very aggressive.

334bu · 01/01/2022 14:32

Any " art" form which uses the word " fishy" to describe someone who is successful at portraying a " real" woman is the epitome of misogyny. There is no celebration of womanhood from people who describe women as bodies that stink.

ArabellaScott · 01/01/2022 14:33

@MaryAndHerNet

There was a time Al Jolson was popular for doing black face. Drag is woman face and one day I hope it'll be as offensive as black face is now.

I think this is what we're seeing. At one point it was considered 'hilarious' for white people to black up. We're past that now, and I wonder if we are now seeing the mocking of women by men in drag coming to a point of being unacceptable.

It used to seem funny to see a man in a frock and make up. These days ... not so much. Tacky, passe, and sometimes slightly dodgy, is more usually the vibe I get.

It's the extreme sexualised nature and vicious, unpleasant names that bother me, most ('Ada H D' is a drag queen who works with/for kids', I find that name pretty distasteful given that many children will be dealing with behavioural issues and won't understand the level of adult humour, There are worse ones, too, of course. 'Miss Carriage' is one that comes to mind. In whose mind is it fine for a man to mock women who've suffered the loss of a baby? ).

Also the pushing of drag onto children with 'drag queen story hour' and school visits, etc. I mean, who the fuck thought ribald, lewd adult entertainment born in night clubs was suitable for young children?

Notimeforaname · 01/01/2022 14:36

My gay BIL told me that every drag queen he knew was very aggressive

That's really unfortunate he's met so many bad people.

A friend of mine once said every doctor they had ever met spoke down to them and demeaned them.
I could never think all doctors are like that but often wonder was it just a coincidence they had met so many unpleasant doctors or was it friends perception of doctors that made them feel they were all awful...🤔

WorriedMumsDontSleep · 01/01/2022 14:37

@JaneJeffer

They're really scary to me.

I am not meaning to be offensive but... I think it is a real instinct part of your brain that detects deception or when something isn't right. Women and children have this in spades. Certain men set off your spider senses and unfortunately you are often proved right, but ignore the instinct out of social convention. Children are wary of clowns, father Christmas when they are really young. Disguise is usually a means to bad things I'm our primal brain and drag set off this mismatçh warning system. I worry that drag being pushed into the mainstream dulls.our natural instincts and that means women and children are less alert to danger. Not a good thing.

VestofAbsurdity · 01/01/2022 14:37

And Al Johnson did so much for black actors and musicians at the time, by going blackface, there was a rhyme and a reason he did this. He campaigned for equality for black people in theatre, films and music. Drag is an art in itself, offensive to women...nah, don't think so, only those out to find a problem with most things.

@Rubyupbeat do please list the campaign work Drag Queens are doing for women.

Everydaydayisaschoolday · 01/01/2022 14:39

My young adult DDs are both strongly feminist. I think I am too but to them I'm a dinosaur. They both LOVE drag whereas I find a lot of it misogynistic in the extreme. They persuaded me to watch RuPaul in the belief it would change my mind. It didn't. I can admire the skill and creativity that goes into some of the acts but I still find it offensive and I wish those young men had some other outlet for their creativity.

1984Winston · 01/01/2022 14:41

I really don't like them, but each to their own I suppose! I just find nothing entertaining about them and I suppose I do find them a bit offensive to women

Smileyoriley · 01/01/2022 14:42

YANBU- nasty and needs to be called out for what it is- misogyny

TowandaForever · 01/01/2022 14:43

@Abhannmor

Always seemed a bit dated even when I was a kid? Panto dames are different . Almost a parody of a parody, they are not trying to really impersonate women. If you are genuinely funny like Edna , well OK , bit otherwise it's like ' look I'm wearing a dress!' Yawn

I hate pantomime Dane's and the way they make fun of womens bodies.

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