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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to not like drag Queens?

999 replies

Draggedalong1 · 01/01/2022 12:04

And why don’t I? To me there is something intimidating and scary in the make up, and harsh glamour, parodied until it’s ugly and I think, aggressive. I remember going to drag shows long again in the 90s and they seemed to be a bit of fun and almost innocent compared to whatever it is about ru Paul et al. Nothing wrong with a bit of dame Edna from what I remember as a kid. What’s the reasoning behind this new style I wonder, and aibu?

OP posts:
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5
WorriedMumsDontSleep · 03/01/2022 11:15

@TooBigForMyBoots

Men performing as women goes back millennia and can be seen in nearly every culture. It wasn't invented in America in the early 19th century.🙈
Yes men played women originally because women were barred from the stage. I don't think we can hold up the ancient Greek or Tudor society as some sort of equal opportunities paradise.
TooBigForMyBoots · 03/01/2022 11:18

I don't think we can hold up the ancient Greek or Tudor society as some sort of equal opportunities paradise.

Just as well I didn't do that then.Grin

MaryAndHerNet · 03/01/2022 11:20

@TooBigForMyBoots

I don't think we can hold up the ancient Greek or Tudor society as some sort of equal opportunities paradise.

Just as well I didn't do that then.Grin

What was your point then?

It's happened for a long time so it's fine?
Was that it?

Men have beaten women for a long time, is that okay because it's happened for millenia?

hangonamo · 03/01/2022 11:34

I'm shocked to see liking drag being compared to being anti vax or creationist. This is people's opinion and lived experience, not science. Many women enjoy drag, do not feel mocked or ridiculed or offended and do not agree that it's misogynistic.

Only on here do I ever come across this self-appointed group of opinion police. Think like us or you're a misogynist, you're like a racist, you're like Priti Patel, you're too stupid to understand what misogyny is, you're gaslighting, you must be a man. Women's rights blah blah blah but your opinion as a woman is not as credible or as valid as mine. You may enjoy Dame Edna and Lily Savage and pantomime at a push, but not Ru Paul. Look at my CAPS and underlining to see how right I am.
It's bizarre and oppressive.

334bu · 03/01/2022 11:50

I'm shocked to see liking drag being compared to being anti vax or creationist. This is people's opinion and lived experience, not science

Have I missed something?

hangonamo · 03/01/2022 11:54

@334bu

*I'm shocked to see liking drag being compared to being anti vax or creationist. This is people's opinion and lived experience, not science*

Have I missed something?

Maybe you missed this

you're afraid you might be wrong but would rather not be so are going with the old "all opinions are valid" approach that is also used by anti-vax and creationists. Yes everyone is entitled to an opinion but not all opinions are created or expressed equally. Therefore not all opinions are equally credible or valid.

TooBigForMyBoots · 03/01/2022 11:57

My point was that drag was not invented in America in the 19th century as said by a PP.

OhWhyNot · 03/01/2022 12:05

Only on here do I ever come across this self-appointed group of opinion police

Grin

I agree its so polarised something many claim to despise but I think they rather enjoy it

hangonamo · 03/01/2022 12:13

@OhWhyNot

Only on here do I ever come across this self-appointed group of opinion police Grin

I agree its so polarised something many claim to despise but I think they rather enjoy it

Smile

It's the combination of "oppression of women is wrong" and "your opinion as a woman is not valid unless it's the same as mine" that is mind boggling to me.

334bu · 03/01/2022 12:16

Because you never say WHY. You never engaged with them saying why they think it IS and explain why you think they're wrong. Just parrotted that you "respect their opinion" but disagree. The fact you aren't willing to articulate or defend your opinion, or even attempt to disprove the stated thesis with your own reasoning, merely restate it again and again, kind of makes it look like you're afraid you might be wrong but would rather not be so are going with the old "all opinions are valid" approach that is also used by anti-vax and creationists. Yes everyone is entitled to an opinion but not all opinions are created or expressed equally. Therefore not all opinions are equally credible or valid. And in real life whilst one might shrug and "agree to disagree" for the sake of office/marital/family/friendship group harmony, this is a DISCUSSION forum, where you're meant to discuss things rather than simply megaphoning.**

I don't think the poster was saying that liking drag is akin to believing the world was created in 7 days by a superior being, rather that just saying you disagree with no reasons why is not very helpful.in a discussion.

334bu · 03/01/2022 12:17

Sorry bold fail.

MaryAndHerNet · 03/01/2022 12:17

I like the phrase opinion police because anyone using it automatically becomes the thing they're using as an insult.

Notimeforaname · 03/01/2022 12:19

Because you never say WHY. You never engaged with them saying why they think it IS and explain why you think they're wrong

But I dont think theyre wrong!!!!

Nobody's personal opinion or taste is wrong. I dont know how else to explain this too you. It wont go in

Notimeforaname · 03/01/2022 12:22

The fact you aren't willing to articulate or defend your opinion, or even attempt to disprove the stated thesis with your own reasoning, merely restate it again and again, kind of makes it look like you're afraid you might be wrong but would rather not be so are going with the old "all opinions are valid" approach that is also used by anti-vax and creationists. Yes everyone is entitled to an opinion but not all opinions are created or expressed equally. Therefore not all opinions are equally credible or valid. And in real life whilst one might shrug and "agree to disagree" for the sake of office/marital/family/friendship group harmony, this is a DISCUSSION forum, where you're meant to discuss things rather than simply megaphoning.

I await some fatuous pitying remark about my lack of open-mindedness grin

You want me to articulate and defend my enjoyment of drag ? I simply love drag. That's it. I'm sorry this bothered you so much dear. Grin

Notimeforaname · 03/01/2022 12:23

Then why didn't you say so when asked 20 pages back?

Maybe you really do need someone to tell you what you think after all wink

God love you Flowers

VestofAbsurdity · 03/01/2022 12:25

That's it. I'm sorry this bothered you so much dear.

Excellent, we've now got the patronising, misogynistic dear in from the poster who can't see the misogyny in Drag.

Notimeforaname · 03/01/2022 12:31

Excellent, we've now got the patronising, misogynistic dear in from the poster who can't see the misogyny in Drag

Yes it's true I definitely dont see the misogyny in drag.

OhWhyNot · 03/01/2022 12:32

hangonamo or on are the wrong side of history ….

334bu · 03/01/2022 12:35

Yes it's true I definitely dont see the misogyny in drag

Can I ask, what is it about drag that appeals to you?

Notimeforaname · 03/01/2022 12:40

Can I ask, what is it about drag that appeals to you?

Oh the whole thing . Creating the performances, the costumes, make up, music,choreography etc all the artistic elements of it. And the shows are always great fun.

I dont watch ru Paul's drag race as I dont really watch tv but I am around drag performers almost every day(they're not always in drag of course)

DontTellThemYourNamePike · 03/01/2022 12:42

At the turn of the twentieth century, a significant proportion of women, some very vocal, did not want women to have the vote. I suppose their opinion must have been right, since they held it ... and they were women. Times change. People change. I still think society will look back at drag (when it inevitably goes into decline) and wonder why it was ever ok.

ClaudiaJ1 · 03/01/2022 12:42

To make a point of how insidious misogyny is, and the type of people who like drag - just how programmed they are to accept this hatred of women, a poster in defence of drag on here said on another thread that their 15 year old brother gave a card to their mother 'from the one she should have swallowed'. This is how damaged these people are, and they are so desensitised to it, they actually think it's normal.

This is what the type of misogyny and hatred of women portrayed in drag leads to. A woman thinking it funny her brother gave their mother a Mother's Day card saying she should have swallowed....

hangonamo · 03/01/2022 12:44

@OhWhyNot

hangonamo or on are the wrong side of history ….
Ah yes - didn't 17th C bear baiting get a mention or did I dream that? 🐻
CowMarshland · 03/01/2022 12:50

One was on I can hear your voice called Kara van Park 🤣

bordermidgebite · 03/01/2022 12:50

Must admit I see toddler with the face paint rather than creativity in a lot of it -

But surely you could have the creativity without for example false boobs , mimicking a female body, stereotype female walks and hair flicks , without reference to the female form and function , without calling yourself a girl ?

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