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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What did your DC's school do if you couldn't get your DC to school as you are too unwell?

423 replies

UndertheCedartree · 01/01/2022 02:32

Just posting here for traffic.

If you are a single parent and have been in a situation that you were still ill to get your DC to school what did school do? I will probably be in this situation next week. This happened once prior to Covid and some of the pastoral care teachers came and picked my DD up. It happened once recently and they suggested she stay at home and do online learning. That was fine as I had twisted my ankle and couldn't put any weight on it but I could help with online learning. However this time I have Covid and will not be able to do online learning with her.

OP posts:
Mushypeasandchipstogo · 02/01/2022 09:15

Gosh I really don’t see that the school should be at all responsible for getting your children to school, it is YOUR responsibility!

sweetbellyhigh · 02/01/2022 09:43

@Mushypeasandchipstogo

Gosh I really don’t see that the school should be at all responsible for getting your children to school, it is YOUR responsibility!
Gosh I really don't see why you can't read the thread and find out!
Abraxan · 02/01/2022 10:01

We actually have one member if staff who has done this, though not for covid related absence, for a very vulnerable child.

It actually costs the teacher money to be able to do so as they have to pay extra insurance in their car in order to carry the child.

It only occurred in very specific reasons and was never a daily occurrence, more one off situations.

Wouldn't happen if the parent has covid though as said teacher is vulnerable themselves regarding covid, so carrying a close contact in an enclosed car wouldn't be an ideal situation. The family would be supported in other ways, such as dropping off a care package and paper based home learning, etc.

Janus · 02/01/2022 13:33

We don’t have anything like a class WhatsApp group either but we do have a school Facebook group, I wonder if yours has this? I’ve seen people asking for help on this before, I’d definitely help someone in your position, I would imagine a rota could be drawn up so if a few come forward the lifts or walking is shared. It may be worth asking school if they know if such a group exists or they could try and see if another parent lives close and ask them direct?
I had one in year 5 during last years lockdown and the work was intense! I have 4 children and the older ones could get on with their own work but my youngest needed a lot of input. There were a few times I mixed things up a bit and we did bbc bitesize for the week, I don’t know if this still exists? Or I bought a couple of year 5 English comprehension/mathematics books off Amazon and we worked through that. Sometimes they just need something to keep them going but that they can do mostly on their own. I did have an email conversation with our teacher and they said as long as you do something that’s usually enough. There’s some good science/geography documentaries on tv too. I think if you could show that there’s work being done, write down everything they do or watch, if you can’t get to school this could be a good temporary measure.
I hope you get better soon. I’m on day 9 and still feel so exhausted. I wouldn’t like to walk 20 minutes each way yet, I think strength needs to be built up, hope you can manage to do that in coming days.

Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:20

@Heshcher

As a teacher, I'm really glad to see how many people are having their eyes openes by this post. You have no idea how much school staff are doing and why so many schools are at breaking point and simly cannot continue to function without more funding. Maybe have a little think about this before you next make rude comments about lazy teachers who won't do what you want them to.
Completely agree with this. Most people have no idea about all the amazing work schools do. And most people only become aware if they need some of that support. It was the same when they were trying to shut down the Children's centre I worked at. Many of the predominantly MC parents who used the centre just saw it as a place for cheap activities for their DC (and of course they could afford the private courses/groups) so weren't so concerned about it closing down. But actually the centre did so much invaluable outreach work but most users had no idea.
OP posts:
Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:26

@Excitedforthefuture

This is an Op Where really beneficial to advance hearth previous threads to get a clear idea that there is a lot lot more to the situation than presented in this particular thread
Not really. The people who gave me useful advice were purely answering my actual question. No need to know I have a mental illness. The situation at home is caused by Covid nothing else!
OP posts:
kittensinthekitchen · 02/01/2022 17:26

@Janus

BBC Bitesize was founded in 1998. It's not a lockdown thing, so is still going. It's a fantastic resource for those who home educate full time, need a refresher, miss some school, study for exams/tests. I hope more people continue to use it, so it keeps running.

Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:27

@Mushypeasandchipstogo

Gosh I really don’t see that the school should be at all responsible for getting your children to school, it is YOUR responsibility!
It is! But how lovely we live in a society where people help others even if they don't have to.
OP posts:
Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:31

@Janus

We don’t have anything like a class WhatsApp group either but we do have a school Facebook group, I wonder if yours has this? I’ve seen people asking for help on this before, I’d definitely help someone in your position, I would imagine a rota could be drawn up so if a few come forward the lifts or walking is shared. It may be worth asking school if they know if such a group exists or they could try and see if another parent lives close and ask them direct? I had one in year 5 during last years lockdown and the work was intense! I have 4 children and the older ones could get on with their own work but my youngest needed a lot of input. There were a few times I mixed things up a bit and we did bbc bitesize for the week, I don’t know if this still exists? Or I bought a couple of year 5 English comprehension/mathematics books off Amazon and we worked through that. Sometimes they just need something to keep them going but that they can do mostly on their own. I did have an email conversation with our teacher and they said as long as you do something that’s usually enough. There’s some good science/geography documentaries on tv too. I think if you could show that there’s work being done, write down everything they do or watch, if you can’t get to school this could be a good temporary measure. I hope you get better soon. I’m on day 9 and still feel so exhausted. I wouldn’t like to walk 20 minutes each way yet, I think strength needs to be built up, hope you can manage to do that in coming days.
Thank you and I hope you feel better soon. The exhaustion is awful! In the first Lockdown when we organised I used a lot of the Bitesize activities/TV shows/games and it worked really well. In the 2nd school set lots of Oak lessons and it was an utter nightmare. My DD could not follow it atall.
OP posts:
Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:32

Please excuse my bad writing I am so tired.

OP posts:
Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 17:33

[quote kittensinthekitchen]@Janus

BBC Bitesize was founded in 1998. It's not a lockdown thing, so is still going. It's a fantastic resource for those who home educate full time, need a refresher, miss some school, study for exams/tests. I hope more people continue to use it, so it keeps running.[/quote]
Completely agree with this - it is a great resource. My DD still plays the games

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 02/01/2022 18:23

Would be more helpful to answer my questions than post this.

So how old is the child and why can't another parent Help?

Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 18:30

@RedHelenB

Would be more helpful to answer my questions than post this.

So how old is the child and why can't another parent Help?

My DD is 9 and unfortunately, I don't know anyone that walks near our road.
OP posts:
RedHelenB · 02/01/2022 18:39

Thank you. If there really is no other adult to get her to school then she will have to miss a couple of days until you've recovered. She won't get massively behind aged 9 if she just does some free online educational games

Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 18:43

@RedHelenB

Thank you. If there really is no other adult to get her to school then she will have to miss a couple of days until you've recovered. She won't get massively behind aged 9 if she just does some free online educational games
Yes, I definitely think I'll go down the BBC Bitesize route rather than the Oak Academy work they set. I'm still hoping school may suggest another way to get her in, but I'll be prepared if she has to stay at home. I'm hoping after next week I can be back to taking her
OP posts:
OverTheRubicon · 02/01/2022 18:44

@RedHelenB

Would be more helpful to answer my questions than post this.

So how old is the child and why can't another parent Help?

Are you seriously demanding for someone to answer your questions when you've not only failed to read the thread, but even just to press to 'see all' by OP and read the (many) prior posts that would have answered this?
Excitedforthefuture · 02/01/2022 18:44

Op
Have you ever don’t a favour for a single classmate in your daughters class?
Ever had a classmate over for a play date?

Surely someone that you have had some interaction with and can drop them a line

Single parent here. I see networking with parents and doing them favours when I can as storing up favours for when I’m in need!!

BitcherOfBlakiven · 02/01/2022 18:59

@Excitedforthefuture

Op Have you ever don’t a favour for a single classmate in your daughters class? Ever had a classmate over for a play date?

Surely someone that you have had some interaction with and can drop them a line

Single parent here. I see networking with parents and doing them favours when I can as storing up favours for when I’m in need!!

I’m a single parent too and doing this is impossible due to working full time. I couldn’t even pick my DCs classmates out of a line up, let alone their parents.

We also don’t have WhatsApp groups. We’re in a very diverse area and over 20 languages are spoken at our school. The only friends of mine that have WAGS are the naice areas.

Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 19:10

@Excitedforthefuture

Op Have you ever don’t a favour for a single classmate in your daughters class? Ever had a classmate over for a play date?

Surely someone that you have had some interaction with and can drop them a line

Single parent here. I see networking with parents and doing them favours when I can as storing up favours for when I’m in need!!

Yes, I have had a couple of class mates over for play dates. One mum I have had coffee with. The problem is she lives in the other direction from school so she couldn't pick DD up on the way to school.
OP posts:
Original poster
UndertheCedartree · 02/01/2022 19:12

@BitcherOfBlakiven - I have also experienced this when working full time and using wraparound care. I knew noone.

OP posts:
BitcherOfBlakiven · 02/01/2022 19:47

@UndertheCedartree the people who can’t imagine having zero support must lead such lovely lives Sad Sorry, my mother is an unbearable alcoholic and my DC have never met her. My Dad moved 100s of miles away when I was a child, to be with his new wife, I haven’t seen him since. My Grandparents are far too old to assist me in any way. All my friends work too. Just the way the cards fell for me.

RedHelenB · 02/01/2022 19:53

See all doesn't work on the app and it's as quick to answer the questions if you know the answer than type the reply. Don't think the OP was bothered as she managed to answer me.

SavoyCabbage · 02/01/2022 22:06

@RedHelenB

See all doesn't work on the app and it's as quick to answer the questions if you know the answer than type the reply. Don't think the OP was bothered as she managed to answer me.

Yes it does.

Abraxan · 02/01/2022 22:08

[quote kittensinthekitchen]@Janus

BBC Bitesize was founded in 1998. It's not a lockdown thing, so is still going. It's a fantastic resource for those who home educate full time, need a refresher, miss some school, study for exams/tests. I hope more people continue to use it, so it keeps running.[/quote]
It was also updated over the first lockdown so has even more in it than it used to. It was one of the tools to be updated for use by schools and parents, alongside Oak Academy.

RedHelenB · 02/01/2022 22:12

What do you press? Doesn't cone up as an option as far as I can see?