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Original poster

Bow often do you see your family/mum?

114 replies

Iyf865rny · 30/12/2021 07:03

After seeing my family over Christmas, DH has been complaining that I insist on seeing my family every other week. My mum and I are fairly close and though we live around an hour away I love popping back home. DH thinks once a month is plenty and we have our own life to be getting on with. How often do you see your family?

OP posts:
Hope54321 · 30/12/2021 12:50

My mum lives 15 minutes away and I see her every week. Dh also sees his family every week. We both have no problem with this.

Youdoyoutoday · 30/12/2021 12:50

My dad comes round 3 times a week for dinner on average and we may have an afternoon jaunt to a garden centre sometimes as well cos we know how to rock a midweek afternoon!

Youdoyoutoday · 30/12/2021 12:50

But he does live 1 mile away

User48751490 · 30/12/2021 12:54

Talk on phone, once a week. See parents once a month.

MrsMariaReynolds · 30/12/2021 13:49

We live about 4000 miles from our parents. Pre-Covid we were lucky enough to spend at least a month visiting them each and every summer. Obviously a lot has changed since then, and I haven't been able to see my mum since Aug 2019.

Bbq1 · 30/12/2021 13:52

@TheStickMan

Every day or if not every other day. My parents live 2 minutes away from us so we see them all the time.
Same. If I don't see my mum one day, I phone her at least once. We are really close.
DorothyZbornakIsAQueen · 30/12/2021 13:52

I see my mum about once or twice a month. My sisters the same and we don't live far from each other. My brother, I can go for months without seeing him.

But believe it or not, we are all very close and chat throughout the day, every day on WhatsApp on our family chat group.

MrsBerthaRochester · 30/12/2021 14:04

Not seen or spoken to my mum in three years since she accused me of sleeping with her partner when I was 15(he was abusive)
Saw my dad in summer this year. First time in nearly two years and it showed that he is as absent now as he was when I was a child. We speak on the phone every 6 weeks or so but only at my instigation. If it werent for dcs I wouldnt bother.

zingally · 30/12/2021 14:20

My mum lives 2 hours away. I physically see her about every 3 months, but talk to her on the phone every day.
My sister, who lives 45 minutes closer to her than I do, sees her even less often.

My mum was widowed in 2017, and in the year following that, I made a real effort to see her every 4-5 weeks, but it has really trailed off in the last year. Mostly because of covid, but also because... life.

Sometimes I feel a bit guilty, and think I should go and see her more often, but then I remember that roads go in both directions and she's perfectly able-bodied. Maybe she doesn't want to impose, but she's never even asked to come my way for a weekend.

peboh · 30/12/2021 14:23

I see my mum at least once a week, she pops round after work for a drink and to see dd. I also see my siblings probably around the same, we meet for drinks out a lot, or pop round to each other's for a drink. We all live in the same town, and are within a 30 minute walk away from each other. If my dh told me how often I could see my family, I'd be showing him the door.

Kitkat151 · 30/12/2021 14:36

@zingally

My mum lives 2 hours away. I physically see her about every 3 months, but talk to her on the phone every day. My sister, who lives 45 minutes closer to her than I do, sees her even less often.

My mum was widowed in 2017, and in the year following that, I made a real effort to see her every 4-5 weeks, but it has really trailed off in the last year. Mostly because of covid, but also because... life.

Sometimes I feel a bit guilty, and think I should go and see her more often, but then I remember that roads go in both directions and she's perfectly able-bodied. Maybe she doesn't want to impose, but she's never even asked to come my way for a weekend.

Have you ever invited her? Your kids ( if you have them ) will be grown and flown one day .... maybe they won’t be arsed with you because of ‘life’ 🙄.... I see my mum lots....I also get visited by my adult kids lots.
IncompleteSenten · 30/12/2021 14:40

It's been over 2 years since I've seen my mum and I'm fine with that.

I saw my sister and her family recently for probably only the 3rd time since the pandemic started and the first time actually visiting my house and it was so amazing! Skype and all that are better than nothing but it was so good to sit down with them.

Tee20x · 30/12/2021 14:42

Does your husband want to go for these Sunday lunches? If he works full time perhaps he wants to relax on the weekends and not have something "booked in" so frequently. I find that having something planned in can be stressful and you don't fully get to relax. Remember they're your parents not his. So while you may find it nice to see them so frequently he may not.

If I was being dragged round for these Sunday lunches so often I wouldn't be best pleased. Maybe you should ask how he feels about it?

Just because you moved doesn't mean that they can't come to you. Yeah it's London but there are good transport links and depending on your/their age and mobility I don't see why they can't make the effort to come to you if they want to see you.

StickyStickyStickStickSong · 30/12/2021 14:58

I see my DM everyday (she lives in the next street) we see MIL once a week on the weekend.
I couldn't imagine seeing my mum only once I week never mind monthly or yearly!
We are really close, she raised me single handedly and then married later in life then became widowed. She doesn't drive either so I do a lot of running about with her but aside from all that I would still want to see her all the time and I really hope my LO does too when I am old

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