Unanswered MN questions

[WomanStanleyWoman]

There are certain threads that come up on MN again and again, year after year - and for me, they throw up obvious questions. Yet on more than one thread, I’ve asked these questions, but no one ever seems to answer. Am I missing something - or is it that the answer would contradict the OP’s key argument?

A couple of examples that spring to mind:

‘What is it with people who won’t answer the door? What if a lovely relative had sent you a surprise and you missed the delivery? What if one of your neighbours had lost their cat and needed to check your garden? What if someone was desperate for help and you just ignored them?!?’

The question I always ask is ‘What do these people do if you’re out?’ Presumably even people who happily answer the door to anyone at any time of day have to go out to work, to the shops, to visit family etc. What do these people desperate to see you do then? Surely the delivery driver puts a card through the door; the neighbour with the cat leaves you a note; the person in desperate need of help tries the next house. If all of these are perfectly workable solutions for when someone is out, why can’t they work if someone just doesn’t feel like answering the door? But no matter how many people I’ve asked, never a reply.

Another one that I’ve seen come up a few times is whether it’s okay to let children/teens leave the crusts off a sandwich. Whenever I see this topic comes up, a few posters will always claim that said teens will be starving and reaching for chocolate later because they didn’t eat enough calories at lunch, because they were ‘fussy’.

I’ve pointed out on more than one of these threads that a slice of bread averages at around 105 calories; therefore there can’t be more than 10 - 15 calories in the crust. I’ve asked the calorie counters if they really believe that a maximum of 30 calories could really make the difference between being full until dinner and a junk food binge mid-afternoon - but again, not a reply.

What are your unanswered questions? Also, feel free to answer either of mine if you can!

What will happen to the tragically-bewildered and over-named offspring of two people both of whom have double-barrelled surnames? Will the world end? Will phone contacts need to leave extra space for humungous 16-barrelled surnames?

Mine would be why you’re giving this headspace…😂

@Bluntness100

Mine would be why you’re giving this headspace…😂

Because it’s the day after Boxing Day, I’m sat in my parents’ house and the alternative is listening to Tom Daley sharing the story of his wedding on Radio 2 😂🤣😝😄

@Ibane

What will happen to the tragically-bewildered and over-named offspring of two people both of whom have double-barrelled surnames? Will the world end? Will phone contacts need to leave extra space for humungous 16-barrelled surnames?

Hahahaha

My unanswered question is what happens to a towel during the tenth use that means it suddenly needs washed that didn’t happen during the previous ten uses?

Because it’s the day after Boxing Day, I’m sat in my parents’ house and the alternative is listening to Tom Daley sharing the story of his wedding on Radio 2

😂😂😂

On any thread that mentions the choice whether to have children or not ... some bright spark always pops up asking why there are childfree-by-choice posters on MN.

Totally ignoring the wealth of threads on here that have nothing to do with children/pregnancy etc; or that even some parenting topics are ones on which anyone can have an opinion, such as 'do you like this name for a baby girl'.

Weird post. As weird as people who don't answer a door IMHO.

What are your unanswered questions?

Why do people want "unique" names for their offspring? (are they channelling Kath & Kim?) And in looking for such a name, why oh why do people give their children a name pronounced like the face cream Nivea (although spelled differently)?

One that annoyed me today, a thread where OP was stuck with the in laws as her DH who drives wouldn't take her out for a bit.

Posters asking 'why don't you drive? Have some lessons!'

As though she could just pop out and get a licence immediately, to solve the problem of that day.

Why would they think that's helpful?!

@LaChanticleer

What are your unanswered questions?

Why do people want "unique" names for their offspring? (are they channelling Kath & Kim?) And in looking for such a name, why oh why do people give their children a name pronounced like the face cream Nivea (although spelled differently)?

Oh, that reminds me of one — why do people on the baby names board want the names of their offspring to ‘match’, like they’re a three-piece suite?

@Puffalicious

Weird post. As weird as people who don't answer a door IMHO.

I think people who make baseless digs are weird too. But I suppose if we were all the same, we’d have smaller shopping centres.

A few -

Does anyone have a nice Mother in Law and will all these mother in law problems go away as soon as all MNers become one, because surely they will be perfect

Why post in AIBU if you keep arguing with the overwhelming majority that you are reasonable when everyone is telling you (since you asked) that you are not

Why keep having children with a feckless man when you know his track record and the act surprised that he is a feckless man

Is there really such a thing as family money? Reading all the distressed posts from so many women would suggest not. It’s only a fantasy that exists as long as the financially productive partner is committed.

Why women still believe that their biological urges to have children equal a man’s unrelenting commitment to raising them. Has MN not taught then mmm anything?

Why people continue to be friends with people who only take, take, take? Being friends with people is a choice.

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

My unanswered question is what happens to a towel during the tenth use that means it suddenly needs washed that didn’t happen during the previous ten uses?

What do you mean? It’s like anything that accumulates dirt - if you hoover weekly, what happens to the floor on day 7 that means it needs hoovering that didn’t happen the first 6 days. Ditto mopping the floor, scrubbing the loo (unless you do it after every use), however frequently you personally do these things, it’s because that’s how long it takes to accumulate the dirt to the level you think needs cleaning. Same with towels, or any item that is used more than once before cleaning/replacing.

Do people really care how 'stylish' anyone else looks at a kids football match/on a hike/on the school run/other random activity? Isn't the functionality more important?

If it was a posh dinner or similar I would understand...

Oh, that reminds me of one — why do people on the baby names board want the names of their offspring to ‘match’, like they’re a three-piece suite?

Also people who ask for “traditional” name suggestions. Which tradition??

Does anyone have a nice Mother in Law

My MIL is lovely! We don't have children so I will never have the pleasure (or otherwise) of being a MIL myself but I have no complaints about mine! I've just treated myself to some new clothes from the cheque she kindly sent me this Christmas .

What do you mean? It’s like anything that accumulates dirt - if you hoover weekly, what happens to the floor on day 7 that means it needs hoovering that didn’t happen the first 6 days. Ditto mopping the floor, scrubbing the loo (unless you do it after every use), however frequently you personally do these things, it’s because that’s how long it takes to accumulate the dirt to the level you think needs cleaning. Same with towels, or any item that is used more than once before cleaning/replacing.

Thank you. My point entirely. Let’s hope those that insist towels are clean right up until the tenth (or 14th or 30th) use are reading.

@TragoCardboardCopper

One that annoyed me today, a thread where OP was stuck with the in laws as her DH who drives wouldn't take her out for a bit.

Posters asking 'why don't you drive? Have some lessons!'

As though she could just pop out and get a licence immediately, to solve the problem of that day.

Why would they think that's helpful?!

Driving threads are always nuts! The question no one can ever answer on those is what you’re supposed to do if you’ve tried and failed to learn; are utterly crap at it and beyond help. Some people will respond ‘Just keep trying! It’s a life skill!’ - as if the fact that it’s a valuable skill will automatically make you good at it.

I’m also always amazed by the number of people who expect others to plan for a life they don’t have - i.e. ‘Oh, it’s all very well not being able to drive if you live in London, but what would you do if you lived in a tiny rural village or a little market town? It’s so limiting!’ Why, given I can’t drive, would I move somewhere like that? Didn’t it occur to them that I might have factored it into my choice of location? Personally I think it’s way more limiting to live somewhere where driving is your only option; where if your car breaks down, you can no longer afford to run it or your eyesight/mobility deteriorates, you are either stuck at home or reliant on lifts and expensive taxis.

will all these mother in law problems go away as soon as all MNers become one, because surely they will be perfect

Cue huge influx to Gransnet with loads of complaints about terrible DiLs in 2041

why do people on the baby names board want the names of their offspring to ‘match’, like they’re a three-piece suite?

This is making me search for a stream of Kath & Kim, and the epis around Eponnee's [sp?] birth

I think people who make baseless digs are weird too. But I suppose if we were all the same, we’d have smaller shopping centres

It's not baseless, it's an opinion (remember, we're allowed those) based on what I think.

Your shopping centre analogy makes no sense. Were you trying to be witty as well as dismissive?

I’m also always amazed by the number of people who expect others to plan for a life they don’t have - i.e. ‘Oh, it’s all very well not being able to drive if you live in London, but what would you do if you lived in a tiny rural village or a little market town? It’s solimiting!’ Why, given I can’t drive, would I move somewhere like that? Didn’t it occur to them that I might have factored it into my choice of location? Personally I think it’s way more limiting to live somewhere where driving is your only option; where if your car breaks down, you can no longer afford to run it or your eyesight/mobility deteriorates, you are either stuck at home or reliant on lifts and expensive taxis.

Damn right! I would never move anywhere that didn't have public transport.

Your shopping centre analogy makes no sense. Were you trying to be witty as well as dismissive?

Well, I thought it was funny. Different opinions and all that, you know.

My pet hatred is when an OP gets bombarded with well meaning advice and then the thread turns into ways she can take the advice offered.

So someone posts about being lonely at Christmas, someone suggests getting a dog. OP politely says she has no real interest in dogs and anyway, works full time. Thread fills up with suggestions of doggy daycare, breads that can be left alone, careers that can be done from home, all ignoring the fact op doesn’t want a fucking dog!