To think there’s no way you can wipe your bum clean?

[crazykoo124]

Born in a mixed race family with a Middle Eastern mother, I was always taught to wash my downstairs with water after no 1s and 2s. We have a built in mini shower head thing to just spray our bums clean, and before that we used to have a jug sort of thing.

I’ve always wondered, do you genuinely think your bum is clean if you only wipe?

The way I see it, if someone dropped a few drops of urine or fecal matter on my flooring at home, I’d scrub it clean and atleast use some water. No way would I give it a wipe clean with a dry wad of tissue! So how can your skin be clean….

Am I missing something? Do you wet the tissue before use?

Sorry for the silly question! Have always wondered.

@aurynne

Unless you're planning a sexual session with bum sex on the carts (in which case you just wash it beforehand), there is no need to have a sterile bumhole. There will always be a number of fecal bacteria around the anus regardless what we do. it does not harm us. It is normal. Humans were never meant to be sterile. No animal is. All other mammals walk around with a bit of poo around their anus. it is normal.

Are you animal? Serious question. Do you really not want to have a higher bar than other creatures on 4 legs?

You can get ones designed to be ok for flushing.
Yikes, no. You can get ones that lie on the packet to make you feel better about lazily flushing them instead of considering your impact on the planet – “I flushed it, it’s gone off to magic elsewhere!” – but you can’t actually get wipes that are OK to flush. Wipes should be fucking banned.

@Snowmanuel

Hilarious. I never thought I’d see people falling all over themselves to prove how clean they keep their arseholes.

It's the new my heating is only set to 5C for 1 hour a day 😂

On a side note the poo troll must have collapsed from excitement at all this content for him. What a lucky little troll 😳

We use the family arse brush like our Roman rulers before us ! There's always a bit of a rush before Mr T.T.M as he is a messy type!

@Sparklingbrook, I would have thought that until the chemo and the dreadfully constipation issues. Became quite sore (piles). So since then it's the aloe Vera it 'bum gel' as DH calls it. Although he likes his own aloe Vera now and will have a small panic if he thinks he's forgot to pack some when we go on holiday!

It’s my arsehole, it doesn’t need to be cleaned like a surgical instrument. It’s not an issue that keeps me awake at night.

@Sparklingbrook Have decided to own it. Cheers... have wanted a name change. #JeSuisCrapslattern

It’s a bit wired that some people are trying to justify dry wiping. If you want to do it, then go ahead. But why fall over backwards trying to justify the washing yourself is no better, when it clearly is. It’s like some kind of inferiority complex, like getting caught out with an unhygienic habit but being too proud to admit that it’s unhygienic.

Definitely OP, when I move I'm considering getting a loo that spouts water when you've been. or a bidet.

@pictish

I’ve seen some crowing on Mumsnet in my time, but ‘I wipe my arse better than you’ takes it to a whole new level.

😂😂😂

@hotmeatymilk

You can get ones designed to be ok for flushing. Yikes, no. You can get ones that lie on the packet to make you feel better about lazily flushing them instead of considering your impact on the planet – “I flushed it, it’s gone off to magic elsewhere!” – but you can’t actually get wipes that are OK to flush. Wipes should be fucking banned.

Agree 100%. Wet Wipes are never ok to put down the loo.

*sashh

OK one I want to know - what do they do in space? Is there some sort of suction?*

Strangely, I read an article on this about half an hour ago. Apparently, they started with a bag taped to their arses. They now have a zero-G toilet but the poo doesn’t break off so there is a special glove for that job. If the zero-G toilet breaks down, they revert to the bag taped to their arses.

No mention of a space bidet though.

Brillo pads here (since the nutmeg grater disappeared)

Guys it’s Monday morning - what on Earth is going on 🤦🏻‍♀️

Does it matter? Some use water, some loo roll. As far as I’m aware no one has ever died from not washing their bum.

@MysweetAudrina

I spray it with flash bathroom and a damp j cloth.

🤣 I sand blast my arse after every shite.

@SplodgeWaddler

Guys it’s Monday morning - what on Earth is going on 🤦🏻‍♀️

Does it matter? Some use water, some loo roll. As far as I’m aware no one has ever died from not washing their bum.

Did you miss the thread title before opening it? Then you read it, now you tell people off. That’s weirder than the thread itself.

@MysweetAudrina

I spray it with flash bathroom and a damp j cloth.

ha ha good idea

@tara66

'Wipes' of any sort are absolutely polluting to the planet and big NO NOs!! They do not degrade and bloke the sewage systems!

We used cheeky wipes. Not polluting the planet here and everyone is nice and clean.

Agree with pps that the spray stuff that you spray onto toilet paper is a good solution. In theory I like the idea of a bidet but never really understood them. Do you just aim the water jet at your bum? Doesn’t it just kind of sluice the poo around?

Depends on the.... shit surely. If you're concerned about cleanliness then up your fibre and roughage! 🤣

I wash my downstairs with method, almond fragrance

I think in hot countries this is more of a problem. Not so much here with daily showering tbh.

@CalmDownBoris72

There’s barely anything to wipe in my case. This is really not an issue, as people have previously mentioned it’s an area designed for poo to come out of, it’ll never be squeaky clean.

‘Feeling’ dirty doesn’t mean you are dirty.

This!

You only have to look at how many people on here 'feel' dirty with perfectly natural amounts of body hair.

I really hope people stop using wet wipes for this - putting them in the bathroom bin instead of down the toilet doesn't make them environmentally friendly!

[quote Trixiefirecracker]@CardiganAddict but surely not all ‘Latin American’ people’s own a bidet? Just like some but not all English people do own one. Lots of ‘English’ people I know remove shows before entering a house and we all certainly wash our hands before eating, so I don’t think you can be so general with your ideas about what countries do as a whole, as it differs widely.[/quote]
Apologies if the the wording isn't correct, I meant to describe my experience of "most" and not "every".
I lived in the North and noticed these differences between me and my friends. I noticed when flat sharing - every single one of my housemates would wear shoes indoors or do the dishes that way and I was considered wierd for wanting to buy my own dishes and keep them separate!
When I was younger I was really aware of it, either when friends were visiting or when I was going to their house. I felt like such a weirdo insisting on washing my hands or automatically taking my shoes off lol.
I also remember able visitors being offended and tutting at having to take their shoes off to go in our house!
It's only now, that I'm in the South East and surrounded by more non-english that I realise it isn't "me" or my family - it's cultural.

A tiny bit of Savlon on the loo roll is good for a tricky one!