Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Failed 6th driving test. Can't bring myself to book test 7

149 replies

bellaella18 · 11/12/2021 15:03

Just failed my 6th driving test this morning. I'm absolutely gutted. I drove pretty well, completed the parking manœuvre correctly. However, when we got to the motorway, traffic was pretty slow and the examiner failed me for not having the appropriate distance from the car ahead ( he said I was too close, about a car's length instead of 2).

I feel embarrassed that I've let myself and family down again. I'm finding it so difficult to book another test.

Any help and support would be greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
usernameshistory · 11/12/2021 16:42

I passed on my 5th. You can do it. I absolutely despised the experience each and every time. Was in my 30's when I eventually passed. On the final one managed to hold my nerve. Also, choose a location without motorways - I personally avoided areas I failed at before because it just didn't click with me (only after having time and space to get used to them alone) for some reason. Passed in a locality with lots of busy and complicated, but slower town traffic and country roads.

Fuuuuuckit · 11/12/2021 16:43

*Driving is a basic life skill.

Everyone should have to be able to drive, even if they choose not to drive a car*

I disagree. There are so many people who can't use a knife and fork, engage in conversation, cook a decent meal or manage their personal finances, so they either suffer themselves or outsource it.

Driving a tonne of metal is a very complicated skill to master, and the risks to others of getting it wrong can be catastrophic.

It's not like doing algebra or long division. Some folk find driving easy, some will always struggle and shouldn't put others at risk.

I'm fairly sure you'd not be so keen for your holiday aircraft pilot to have only passed his flying test after scraping through on the 21st attempt? No matter how much they'd spent on lessons?

SethWho · 11/12/2021 16:46

@usernameshistory

I passed on my 5th. You can do it. I absolutely despised the experience each and every time. Was in my 30's when I eventually passed. On the final one managed to hold my nerve. Also, choose a location without motorways - I personally avoided areas I failed at before because it just didn't click with me (only after having time and space to get used to them alone) for some reason. Passed in a locality with lots of busy and complicated, but slower town traffic and country roads.
How much say can OP have over the test route?
Vbree · 11/12/2021 16:47

Please keep going. I passed recently and it's really changed my life.

girlmom21 · 11/12/2021 16:48

How much say can OP have over the test route?

I suppose she could pick a test centre whose routes best suit her stronger points.

I chose a test centre with big roundabouts and lots of dual carriageways because they were easy (for me)

slashlover · 11/12/2021 16:52

Would you consider an automatic? I failed 5 or 6 times then passed the first time I tried in an automatic. I then drove for a year and retook the test in a manual, passed first try then.

BamberGascoine · 11/12/2021 16:53

@bellaella18 keep going! I gave up after my 3rd and it took me 20 years to do it again. Admittedly I did pass on the next one so a break may have helped but I regret it so much

SethWho · 11/12/2021 16:54

@girlmom21

How much say can OP have over the test route?

I suppose she could pick a test centre whose routes best suit her stronger points.

I chose a test centre with big roundabouts and lots of dual carriageways because they were easy (for me)

Good point. Where I live there is one test centre but we are rural.
clarepetal · 11/12/2021 16:56

You haven't let anyone down! Don't tell anyone when you sit your test and that takes pressure off immediately. Chin up, you will get there. Xx

Justgorgeous · 11/12/2021 16:58

21 times ?? 🤨

TractorAndHeadphones · 11/12/2021 16:58

Don’t worry OP people can fail on silly things… good luck!

lizzie1051 · 11/12/2021 17:04

Keep going! I passed on my 7th time (in an automatic ) and was so done. I passed 2 years ago now and need to drive a lot for my job. And touch wood have not yet had any accidents or anything. I think a lot of it was just nerves after failing previously. Some people get lucky and pass first or second time but are not ready to drive. It’s so worth it when you do finally pass and the fact it took so many attempts becomes irrelevant. I was prescribed propranolol which doesn’t stop you feeling nervous but does help with the physical side effects of anxiety so might be something to consider.

Libertybauble · 11/12/2021 17:09

I failed six times and passed on my seventh. By which time my nerves were gone as I’d done it so many times, which meant I relaxed a lot more and didn’t make any silly mistakes.

You can do it. Don’t give up!!!

LolaButt · 11/12/2021 17:11

If you can’t see the car in fronts tyres on the tarmac then you’re too close. One car length?! I’m glad they failed you.

I hope you get some more lessons and experience under supervision on the road to get you to a better and more confident standard.

Kendodd · 11/12/2021 17:15

God, do you have to drive on the motorway in a test now?

I'm with the others, keep going op.

Prescottdanni123 · 11/12/2021 17:15

@Fuuuuuckit

Fuck me op, if you've driven so poorly that you've failed 6 times, are you sure you should be driving?

You're allowed 15 minor faults and still pass, let's be honest that if things are going so badly that you've exceeded this level, I'd rather you weren't on the road.

£62 a go for the test itself, plus 2 hours of instructor time, never mind lessons in between. The financial cost alone is staggering.

It's perfectly OK not to drive. I have friends who passed first time but have never driven since. I have friends who've had a licence years but hate driving. I have friends who passed but are terrified and daren't drive on their own.

Who is piling on the pressure OP? Driving is HARD, and not all of us get it. Surely it's safer to not be on the roads rather than because you feel forced to.

It took me 7 times, 8 including the one I had to cancel due to illness.

I'm perfectly capable of being on the road, thank you. The reason why I failed was due to pressure of the exam - I've always struggled with practical exams of any type - I didn't fail because I'm incapable of driving. I knew how to do it, I could drive just fine with my instructor in the car. I just went to pieces during the actual test. The anxiety was crippling. After I passed the test, I was fine.

OP, you will pass. It doesn't matter how many times it takes. @Fuuuuuckit clearly doesn't understand how severe exam pressure can be. Whether or not you should be driving is not defined by how many times it takes to pass your test. I know people who passed 1st time and drive like absolute lunatics who definitely should not be allowed behind a wheel. Whereas someone who took ten times to pass is one of the safest drivers I know.

What helped me was taking the tests one step at a time. I'd think things like "I just need to get past this corner/roundabout etc and deal with the next thing when I get to it".

MatildaIThink · 11/12/2021 17:16

Whilst I understand it must be disappointing I think you need to also consider that if you are making this many mistakes in a test environment, which is only a short period where you are giving 100% focus, are you really going to be safe long term, with real world distractions in the car (children, passengers who talk, phone ringing in your bag, rushing because something has made you late etc.). Maybe driving just is not for you.

IrishMamaMia · 11/12/2021 17:16

I've always been a nervous driver and it took a lot attempts to pass. Please keep going, you'll definitely get it and as others said it makes you a great driver as you clock up so much practice.
Keep having pre-tests. My lovely instructor came with me in the back seat the day I passed and I think that helped me to properly relax.

kowari · 11/12/2021 17:17

My DM passed on her 7th attempt at age 30, over 30 years ago. If she had given up after her 6th fail she'd wouldn't have been able to drive all that time.

Thepowerofthelook · 11/12/2021 17:21

I passed on my seventh time. I just panicked every time but one day I had had some upsetting news and so wasn't worrying.
Also good advice not to tell anyone.

Iblinkedandiamold · 11/12/2021 17:23

I passed on my 4th try, I made mistakes I never made while driving with my instructor. I was doing what I thought I should do.
On my 4th attempt I drove as I normally did and sailed through it.
Do it again and forget about the past ones.
I was failing for being over cautious at roundabouts.

generalh · 11/12/2021 17:23

I passed on my 7th attempt!

littlebilliie · 11/12/2021 17:24

Keep going it took me 4, I was really nervous and went to bits on the day. By the 4th I was thinking I'll be doing it again next month and that really helped

Bobrosspaintbrush · 11/12/2021 17:39

Oh sod off you shouldn’t be driving because you failed lot.
I know someone passed first time with a few minors, 3 weeks later driving like a dickhead wrapped their car around a lamppost and killed their best mate.
It took me 4 attempts to pass and my fourth attempt was close I had 12 minors. Nerves played a big part in my failed attempts, been driving 15 years. No accidents. Not killed anyone.
Driving test should be scrapped and it should be driving assessment over so many weeks.
Keep going, book another test you will pass.

IrishMamaMia · 11/12/2021 17:40

I also had hypnosis and fond it helpful :)