Aibu not to buy gifts for teachers?

[MrsHookey]

I do it every year but am just fed up as there are so many expenses. Aibu to just write a nice card instead?

Just to reassure, in my 12 years of teaching I have never let a present or lack of affect how I feel about or teach a pupil. Presents are just a lovely thought, but not giving a present doesn't make me think badly of any family.

I gave a present to my midwife on her last visit (and was very emotional - she was amazing) and I give chocolates to my postie and the bin guys. I shall be giving chocolates to my son's nursery workers, as they've been so helpful with his speech this year. It's nice to give a token of appreciation if you can and want to.

And to the PP who says teachers were working from home - yawn! Lots of us have said before that plenty of teachers were in school teaching (I work with SEN so I was absolutely in, no masks, face-to-face) and those who weren't were, at most, wfh for 4 months. Back at school in September 2020. But I don't get any freebies or perks unlike others, some of whom were working from home for around 18 months!

Regardless, if people are appreciative, they're allowed to show it. Whatever that person might do for a living.

Teachers were not working from home! We were in school. Schools were only actually "shut" (to non-keyworker children) for 5 weeks from March to June 2020 as the Easter holidays and half term fell within April and May. Then large numbers of children returned in bubbles from June 2020.

That's a completely separate issue to gifts though.

I've never understood the teacher gift thing. A primary teacher has what, 30 kids in a class? Who on earth needs or wants 30 presents?

Don’t. I’ve never met a teacher who cares. We’re always grateful but honestly it just doesn’t matter. A card is very nice.

I contribute to teacher gifts, but tbh I think most teachers are happy with a genuine heartfelt thank you.

I always send a short email to my DC's teachers to say thank you at the end of term. It always slightly staggers me how genuinely chuffed each class teacher is to get that actual written thank you note - it makes me sad, in a way, because it's clearly not something that many parents do - and I think that can be appreciated far more than John Lewis vouchers or a Christmas plant.

@WhenSepEnds

Teachers do a great job....but so do other professions. I do wonder why they are singled out so much? One of my friends has 3 primary age kids and was asked To put in £30 per collection!!! That's far too much IMO (I think she refused) teachers were able to work from home and were in Far safer position than many of us who worked frontline jobs throughout the whole pandemic so I personally don't think it's justified to single them out

Haven't read rest of posts yet but just had to reply to you- I'm a teacher and I did not get to 'work from home' - I had to go in everyday to teach the key worker children- and yes we taught them, as well as home learning the rest xx

@MrsHookey

My sister says they do a hard job and long hours and it's just a little something. Also they remember who bought what. I'm just fed up with copious expenses though.

There are plenty of jobs that are hard and long hours yet don't routinely get gifts given at Christmas.. i never get this sycophantic gift giving of teachers. It's a job. Nothing else..

teachers were able to work from home and were in Far safer position than many of us who worked frontline jobs throughout the whole pandemic so I personally don't think it's justified to single them out

Teachers were not able to work from home during the second lockdown and most of them were in at least on rota during the third lockdown. TAs were in throughout both, looking after and educating the children of those who were on the frontline.

I don’t think they should be singled out for that, but at least be accurate.

@WoWsers16

Haven't read rest of posts yet but just had to reply to you-
I'm a teacher and I did not get to 'work from home' - I had to go in everyday to teach the key worker children- and yes we taught them, as well as home learning the rest xx

Yes, and so did many many many other professions. A lot of them on the front line and watching people dying everyday but they are not graced with yards loads of tat as thank you presents for doing their job.

There are plenty of jobs that are hard and long hours yet don't routinely get gifts given at Christmas.. i never get this sycophantic gift giving of teachers. It's a job. Nothing else..

This is true, but then there are lots of jobs that routinely command tips from many people, without much rhyme or reason. I never get why teacher gifts get so much criticism compared to hairdressers, drivers, postmen, refuse collectors etc getting tips.

If you're not feeling like doing it this year, don't. I'm sure you've spent enough over the years. I'm having similar thoughts except in my case I don't actually like the people concerned but feel I should as it's expected.

[quote SpeckledlyHen]@WoWsers16

Haven't read rest of posts yet but just had to reply to you-
I'm a teacher and I did not get to 'work from home' - I had to go in everyday to teach the key worker children- and yes we taught them, as well as home learning the rest xx

Yes, and so did many many many other professions. A lot of them on the front line and watching people dying everyday but they are not graced with yards loads of tat as thank you presents for doing their job.[/quote]
I'm not saying about presents - I'm correcting the post that said teachers stayed at home.

I only wasn't at work when I got diagnosed with cancer in summer 2020 , however when I completed my treatment I got cakes for the radiotherapy staff, cakes for the chemotherapy staff, cakes for the receptionists and a bag of treats for the oncology department.

I like giving gifts - I give presents to teachers - but also to other professions- refuse collectors , postman etc... x

@Lushplease

Yanbu.

I think some people forget that teachers are actually paid to teach their dc.
Chances are they don't even particularly like your little darling

I’m perfectly aware of this. That’s why I think she deserves a little thank you gift after a full term with my “darling” Haha

Gifts are usually to show you care and appreciate someone.

It's the group gift giving I hate. I feel under tremendous pressure to contribute (and everyone who has paid is listed in the group WhatsApp). I simply can't afford it for 3 kids- this year it's gone up to £15 each.

@WhenSepEnds

Teachers do a great job....but so do other professions. I do wonder why they are singled out so much? One of my friends has 3 primary age kids and was asked To put in £30 per collection!!! That's far too much IMO (I think she refused) teachers were able to work from home and were in Far safer position than many of us who worked frontline jobs throughout the whole pandemic so I personally don't think it's justified to single them out

No teachers worked from home here!

Teacher pp, you are so right that an email complimenting a teacher sent to the head is a great idea, and it's free, takes two minutes, and is environmentally friendly. I cringe when I see teacher gift mugs etc, a few years in to your career you'd have dozens of these.

Different profession but I saw someone on here mention they got their midwife a keyring with their (the posters) dcs name and date of birth on it! Some people really don't think when it comes to gifts.

As a teacher I'd appreciate a lovely message as much as a present. The gifts I remember are always the smallest, for example a bag of Haribo as the child remembered they're my favourite.

A card is fine! It’s their job.. they’re paid to do it!

@itwasntaparty

We always do a group thing, no pressure, stick a quod or ten or nothing, all kids sign the card.

Same here. It means that the money can go on one or two nice things - which teacher(s) can either keep at school, take home, use or regift. Vouchers are the usual fall-back. Not particularly exciting but it means that they can get what they want, when they want.

I feel so much better after reading this thread! I have three children, two in nursery where multiple staff are involved in their care but they have a single key worker each. Then I have one at school with two class teachers plus the TAs etc. The buying of gifts for all these people is honestly more than we can afford but I was feeling like the only parent in the world who was planning to just do cards. I'm glad I'm not alone.

@CarrieBlue

Why does this thread strike me as horribly goady?

Buy a gift or don’t buy a gift, you don’t need to announce you’re not doing something which isn’t compulsory anyway.

It's not being deliberately anything! I usually do and very much appreciate the massive efforts that staff make! I will probably cave and do it anyway once paid.

At the previous school I met the caretaker struggling to carry all his gifts. I guess maybe it's different in different areas.

Maybe it's enough to get cards and a tin of biscuits for the staff room. I can get DS's full time assistant something. It just exhausts me when I start thinking about the after school staff and the TAs and the reception etc etc.

@MrsHookey

Maybe it's enough to get cards and a tin of biscuits for the staff room. I can get DS's full time assistant something. It just exhausts me when I start thinking about the after school staff and the TAs and the reception etc etc.

Stick to what you’d initially decided. Just send cards. Honestly, that’s more than enough.