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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask DM if we can bring dog

105 replies

Jazzy1000 · 08/12/2021 21:32

My parents have a holiday house and kindly offer us a few days here and there when they're not using it. We got a dog last year and they said they'd prefer we didn't have her in holiday house so we put her into kennels last summer when we stayed.

They offered us another few days over Christmas - aibu to ask could we bring dog? We hate putting her in kennels so it kind of takes the good out of outting.

For context she's a non shed small whippet, never has accident s etc. The house is well worn in. My parents always had dogs themselves til a few years ago which they always had staying in same house. In fact they used to assume we d take care of their dog for weeks on end when our kids were small and we lived in apartment, it was really inconvenient but I never complained.

Aibu to ask is there any chance we could bring doggie with us this time?

OP posts:
Sciurus83 · 08/12/2021 21:34

OK to ask but be gracious if they say no, it's their house

Howeverdoyouneedme · 08/12/2021 21:36

The thing is, they didn’t want your dog before, so why now? Some people don’t want dogs in their houses. I guess it doesn’t make sense to you because they’ve had dogs before, but this is what they say now.

You can ask I suppose. I personally wouldn’t.

Mrgrinch · 08/12/2021 21:39

Very unreasonable.

They've offered you a kind gift and set a restriction on no dogs. If you want to take your dog away then pat for somewhere suitable. You'd be taking the piss even asking to be honest.

LawnFever · 08/12/2021 21:39

Yeah ask, weird that they’ve had dogs in the past and have suddenly taken against the idea - unless your dog was a crazy destructive puppy which it doesn’t sound like it is!

Sarahlou63 · 08/12/2021 21:44

We hate putting her in kennels so it kind of takes the good out of outting

That's your problem, not theirs. Find a kennels you (and your dog!) likes or get house/dog sitters.

Rolypolybabies · 08/12/2021 21:47

Could you offer to keep it in the kitchen or something?

HalfWomanHalfMincePie · 08/12/2021 21:52

Decline the offer and explain it's because leaving the dog isn't something you want to do again.

Do it graciously.

They may not have realised it's such an issue for you and may offer for the dog to stay after all?

CraftyGin · 08/12/2021 21:54

@Jazzy1000

My parents have a holiday house and kindly offer us a few days here and there when they're not using it. We got a dog last year and they said they'd prefer we didn't have her in holiday house so we put her into kennels last summer when we stayed.

They offered us another few days over Christmas - aibu to ask could we bring dog? We hate putting her in kennels so it kind of takes the good out of outting.

For context she's a non shed small whippet, never has accident s etc. The house is well worn in. My parents always had dogs themselves til a few years ago which they always had staying in same house. In fact they used to assume we d take care of their dog for weeks on end when our kids were small and we lived in apartment, it was really inconvenient but I never complained.

Aibu to ask is there any chance we could bring doggie with us this time?

Ask if you can take the dog. If they say no, politely decline their offer of the stay.
peboh · 08/12/2021 21:56

There's no harm in asking, but don't expect their stance to change. The may have had dogs in the past, but decided now that they don't want dogs on their properties and that's their prerogative.

CraftyGin · 08/12/2021 22:06

Do your ILs market their holiday home as 'pet free'? If so, you can't take your dog.

Pippa12 · 08/12/2021 22:10

I wouldn’t ask as they’ve already said a categoric no.

I would graciously thank them for their offer but as you can’t leave the dog you’ll sadly have to decline for the foreseeable and your both so disappointed.

If they were ever going to let you take the dog, they’ll offer at this point.

If it’s marketed as pet free, then you are being unreasonable even suggesting it.

WildNorthEast · 08/12/2021 22:13

They've already said no. You know that asking them will put them in an awkward position. Not everyone loves the smell of dog in their home and unless you're bathing your dog everyday (which obviously isn't healthy for the dog) your dog will smell.

NeedsCharging · 08/12/2021 22:16

They have already stated their preference for you using their property. Why would you want to make it awkward by asking them again when they have already said no?
They will either say no again and feel put out/guilty or say yes because they feel pressured by you.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 08/12/2021 22:16

They're your parents...of course you can ask! Just be prepared for a no

Darbs76 · 08/12/2021 22:18

Look for home boarding. I wouldn’t enjoy my holiday if my dog was in the kennels.

SnarkyBag · 08/12/2021 22:20

You can ask but you need to accept it if they say no. I wouldn’t put a whippet in kennels you need a proper home from home doggy boarding in someone’s home! Have a lurcher who is a needy prince and it took a while to find the perfect person but now he loves going away and he spends as much time on her bed as he does mine!

Lou98 · 08/12/2021 22:25

There's no harm in asking as long as you accept it without argument if they say no.

Although if they've already said no dogs I don't think I'd expect it to change

Billandben444 · 08/12/2021 22:29

I'd say 'it's a lovely offer but we can't take you up on it because of Fido' and then sit back and see what happens next. Please don't actually ask them as they've already said no.

PrincessNutella · 08/12/2021 22:30

We just had Thanksgiving and relatives asked us if they could bring their dog. I love these relatives so much and it felt really awkward to say no. I wish I could do everything for them. But the dog barks constantly, especially during meals, and for some reason, they just don't seem to hear the relentless noise. It would make the holiday so miserable for everyone else. I felt guilty having the dog in a doggy hotel place (not a kennel) for Thanksgiving, it was expensive for them, but I also can't tell them why their dog's behavior is a problem because they aren't going to change and I don't want to start a war and the dog is old anyway. What I'm saying is: In light of the fact that your parents have had dogs in the past, is it possible that your dog has some bad behaviors that you aren't addressing?

NeedAHoliday2021 · 08/12/2021 22:33

I’d usually say no but it’s your mum so I can’t imagine not being able to ask my mum. Mind you, mum would know dpup comes with us so it wouldn’t be an issue.

Bagelsandbrie · 08/12/2021 22:39

I don’t see why you’d think they’d say yes this time when they said no before? They clearly think they’ve set the dog rules now…! But no harm in asking I guess!

Lizzy1980 · 08/12/2021 22:55

@HalfWomanHalfMincePie

Decline the offer and explain it's because leaving the dog isn't something you want to do again.

Do it graciously.

They may not have realised it's such an issue for you and may offer for the dog to stay after all?

This
Returnoftheowl · 08/12/2021 22:58

I think it would be worth asking. If not i'd imagine you'll have to decline... Wouldn't have thought you'd find a kennel at this late notice. Mine is already all booked up for Christmas 2022!

Feetupteashot · 08/12/2021 22:59

Yabu she has already told you her preference!

Feetupteashot · 08/12/2021 23:00

Have said no to a dog stay before and its very awkward.

Stull finding the dog hairs even tho the dog didn't come!

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