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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

… to think that the postman should take his earphones out when delivering the mail?

180 replies

Thunderpat · 02/12/2021 12:56

My postman wears earphones when he is delivering the mail. This is annoying, but is it actually something that he shouldn’t do?

I have a newborn and live in a tall skinny house which means that I am usually doing something with the baby at the top of the house when he rings. I try calling to him out of the window (he can’t hear me) or grabbing baby and running down three flights of stairs, but by the time I get to the door he is well on his way up the road with his earphones in and a cheery spring in his step.

AIBU to think that he should take his earphones out when delivering the mail?

OP posts:
Flossieskeeper · 02/12/2021 19:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Offmyfence · 02/12/2021 19:34

@Thunderpat

Thank you for my pass *@NovemberNovemberDarkNights*.

I can ask for things to be left outside the door on my Royal Mail app settings when it is redelivered, or any other type of delivery, but not for the post when it comes first time round.

I would like to explain my situation to the postma, but I can’t seem to catch him (… and one could only do so with visual means).

I tell you what, you stay downstairs with the baby? That way you'll get to the door and problem solved.

They're not their to wait several minutes for you!

Mrstamborineman · 02/12/2021 19:36

Yabu it’s his job to deliver not be warden checking on things.

Offmyfence · 02/12/2021 19:37

@RestingMurderousFace

Interesting replies. Surprised how many people think YABU.
Why?
RhondaZ · 02/12/2021 19:56

@Thunderpat

Where I used to live, the postman heard my elderly neighbour calling out when she had fallen down the stairs - she wouldn’t have stood much chance with this guy, though.
It's not really his job to rescue elderly people.
jelly79 · 02/12/2021 20:34

YABU

Why is there a need to make people accommodate every single possibility. His job is to post mail. He is posting mail.

Would you say a deaf person couldn't be a postman in case they didn't hear you calling them.

DroopyClematis · 02/12/2021 21:20

Just don't answer the door and collect your oackages from the local sorting office named on the card that your postie will put through your door.

He/she does NOT have the time to wait for you to do a nappy change then schlepp down two flights of stairs.

Or maybe have your baby's stuff on the ground floor?

I'm doing a massive eye roll right now.

Offmyfence · 02/12/2021 21:23

@MythicalBiologicalFennel

My postman used to do that.

Wouldn't deliver parcels, he came with the "you weren't home" notices already filled in.

Once I was at home, saw him coming through the front garden path and push the notice through the letterbox. He didn't ring the bell and didn't stop. He was two meters away from me (window glass between us) but he never looked up. He carried on his merry way. I opened the door and called him - no reply. I had to chase him down the street shouting and eventually he saw me (saw me not heard me) and we walked together to his van where he gave me my parcel. He was most put out. Not good enough and yanbu op.

But this postman is knocking and OP has acknowledged that, so why is your situation a comparison?

I also find it difficult to believe that he was doing this, he'd only have to try again to deliver and do the same thing if you asked for a redelivery.

RhondaZ · 02/12/2021 22:58

I'd love Joe Wilkinson/Postman Pat to be my Postman. Well apart from using my bathroom.

I think its lovely that your postman has a nice day with his music. We have music in the office. Never worried that an older colleague had a fall and I missed it.

NowEvenBetter · 03/12/2021 00:14

@Missmissmiiiiiiiiisss

Ignore the people being unkind. We all have these moment with a small baby. You haven’t done anything at all to this postman. You’ve just had a little rant online. Hardly crime of the century. Hope you get some rest today.
OP is being unkind. And nah, we don’t all have these moments with a little baby. HTH
Yournamehere007 · 03/12/2021 03:29

I think you need a hobby. Cycling is good as you will be out of the house for hours and all weekend so no need to see the postman.

ISpyCobraKai · 03/12/2021 03:34

Then you can post about annoying people when you "do your hobby".
You won't tell us what it is as that will be outing.

gofg · 03/12/2021 04:09

Except he is providing a service and doing a bad job of it

Oh for goodness sake. Your comment says a lot about the type of person you are - and give me a music listening mailman any day!

YABVU OP - and I agree with many other posters, put the baby down before you run down the stairs.

Incidentally, I'm not in the UK but I have given written authority to a couple of courier services and the post office to leave mail if I don't answer the door - can't you do something like that? So much easier, they knock on the door to let me know they are there and leave the parcel - no waiting around for them.

bowchickawowwoww · 03/12/2021 04:18

Put a note on the door. Problem solved

Justilou1 · 03/12/2021 04:18

Leave a note explaining just that…
“Hey Postie, I know you have a busy job - especially at this time of year, but I am home. You just can’t hear me call out because you have your headphones in. I usually have a baby stuck to me, and have to come down three flights of stairs. Do you mind pulling your earphones out so you can hear me yell out if you have a parcel please? I promise I’ve been trying to get your attention! Thanks!!!”

Testingprof · 03/12/2021 07:53

@gofg

Except he is providing a service and doing a bad job of it

Oh for goodness sake. Your comment says a lot about the type of person you are - and give me a music listening mailman any day!

YABVU OP - and I agree with many other posters, put the baby down before you run down the stairs.

Incidentally, I'm not in the UK but I have given written authority to a couple of courier services and the post office to leave mail if I don't answer the door - can't you do something like that? So much easier, they knock on the door to let me know they are there and leave the parcel - no waiting around for them.

You have no idea actually. Expecting the postman to actually deliver the post isn’t unreasonable. If you think so I think that speaks volumes to the job you do (it doesn’t but it’s equally as ridiculous a statement as you have made).

The postman should wait long enough for a response, my grandmother would probably take longer to get to the door than the OP from 10 ft away, would you think that she should stand by the door from 10-3 (those are the times the post has been delivered when we’ve been there, mine comes consistently around 2:30-3)? If the postman leaves her a sorry we couldn’t deliver note, she has no way to get to the post office other than a taxi, as far as I’m concerned that would be poor service.

I notice you took the rest of my comment out which I have stated that my postman is great and while he listens to his headphones when out walking is always polite and we exchange pleasantries, where he removes an earbud to engage.

LakieLady · 03/12/2021 08:29

Get one of those outdoor, lockable parcel boxes, then you can retrieve your parcels when it's convenient.

Offmyfence · 03/12/2021 09:17

@Testingprof

The postman should wait long enough for a response, my grandmother would probably take longer to get to the door than the OP from 10 ft away, would you think that she should stand by the door from 10-3 (those are the times the post has been delivered when we’ve been there, mine comes consistently around 2:30-3)? If the postman leaves her a sorry we couldn’t deliver note, she has no way to get to the post office other than a taxi, as far as I’m concerned that would be poor service.

Unless you live in Greendale, this is not going to happen, the postman will not wait an extended length of time, as some people (as proved on MN just never answer the door.

They have an allotted amount of time to complete their round, therefore if they wait ages for people who are on the top floor of a three storey house, who have to pick up their baby to descend two sets of stairs, the chances are they have moved on. If they waited for ages for everyone to answer, not just give a reasonable amount of time, then they would run out of allotted time and they it is up to them to agree to overtime (assuming their office agrees it) or not. If they have commitments outside of work, then they may not choose the overtime and therefore the people at the end of delivery don't get post.

It is not a charity or a "service", it is a privatised company that is only interested in increasing profits.

My DH is a postman (a very popular one judging by his Christmas tips), he wears headphones etc, will wait as long as he can, but he has a job to do and can't be held up all the time, particularly at this time of year and when online shopping is at an all time high.

Offmyfence · 03/12/2021 09:27

Obviously it is a "service" as in you've paid for the delivery, but that it is within reasonable timescales etc, they cannot wait indefinitely or come back at random times. The job has to be completed within a reasonable timescale to ensure everyone gets a reasonable service.

Frankola · 03/12/2021 20:02

Aren't you a fun sponge?! Shock

Put your newborn in their cot and go down the stairs a bit quicker. I live in a 3 storey house and yes you sometimes have to make a dash for the door but I would never complain about my postie listening to his music. Intact mine does this too and I've never missed him knocking

Offmyfence · 03/12/2021 20:28

@Frankola

Aren't you a fun sponge?! Shock

Put your newborn in their cot and go down the stairs a bit quicker. I live in a 3 storey house and yes you sometimes have to make a dash for the door but I would never complain about my postie listening to his music. Intact mine does this too and I've never missed him knocking

But does your postman go away with a cheer spring in his step? OP seems to object to him being happy..... how very dare he!
KarmaStar · 03/12/2021 20:47

Moan whinge whine complain

Frankola · 03/12/2021 20:53

@offmyfence I've never watch him closely enough.

I'll watch him tomorrow and scold him if he does!

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/12/2021 20:54

Yes, YABU.

Offmyfence · 03/12/2021 20:57

[quote Frankola]@offmyfence I've never watch him closely enough.

I'll watch him tomorrow and scold him if he does![/quote]
Make sure you do!