Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you date a binman?

641 replies

TrishM80 · 02/12/2021 09:17

Inspired by another thread about being a binman as a career.

You meet a guy on a night out or OLD. Seems nice enough and nice looking, all good. Tells you he's a binman.

YABU - immediate turn off
YANBU - give him a chance

OP posts:
lockitdown · 02/12/2021 11:19

@Bunnyrun5

I think I’m going to be in the minority here but I’ll stick my neck out… It’s a no from me based on the fact a binman likely to have low career aspirations limited career progression? Promotion .. Driving the truck? Average salary, yes it’s a job but can’t imagine having the ‘how was your day chat’ after work might go yawn 🥱 Sorry I know they do a great job and someone’s got to do it, but I’ve never liked men with dirty finger nails.
Ok, even though my husband was the driver, I totally give you the dirty fingernail bit. That was a hard one to get past but now we have that beat.
Birdsnesting · 02/12/2021 11:20

Sorry I know they do a great job and someone’s got to do it, but I’ve never liked men with dirty finger nails.

They do wash after their shift, you know. The only binman I knew well is my FiL, now retired, and he was and is the most scrupulously clean man.

Cocomarine · 02/12/2021 11:20

@TrishM80

32Kendoddsdadsdogsdadsdead

"The thread the OP refers to is regarding a pp about the posters friend dismissing her sons job choice when he said he wanted to be a binman. Consensus was people would want their children to 'aim higher' than a bin man."

Thanks KenDodd, at last someone gets the idea behind the thread! Grin

I wanted to see if the snobbery behind women not wanting their sons aspire to become binman transferred over to women not wanting to date binman. Just a little social experiment people, no need to take it so personally!

Social experiment? 🙄 It’s not though, is it? Don’t be silly.

It’s two totally different questions.
You can happily date a bin man whilst wanting your child to have more options.

AliceA2021 · 02/12/2021 11:21

@lockitdown

I used to think that "it" wouldn't work with someone who doesn't have a similar level of education as me. How wrong I was. My Husband doesn't even have GCSE's ("o" levels) but got a BTec later in life. I have a degree, 2 postgrad diplomas and a masters.

It works. 22 years later, it totally works. Be more open minded.

Indeed.

Some are so closed minded that they miss out.

Congratulations 22 years is more than most..

BertieBotts · 02/12/2021 11:22

"I had a relationship with someone previously who had a job rather than a career. Didn’t bother me. However, as time went on, I found she also had no desire to better herself, push herself, try new things, help make a better life for us. There seemed to be a link between the lack of desire to push herself or progress at work and the rest of the aspects of our life which meant it all fell to me."

This doesn't appeal to me at all Confused why would you want to be striving and trying to change things constantly (unless they are no good)? Surely if you find your niche in life, stable job, income that allows you to live comfortably, you've won the jackpot. I don't get the attitude of more, more, more.

Which probably just means I wouldn't be very compatible with that poster :o

"can’t imagine having the ‘how was your day chat’ after work might go yawn"

I bet they would have far more interesting stories than someone working in an office.

Hoolahupsaresquare · 02/12/2021 11:22

I’ll be honest when online dating it’s a huge pool of men - a lot of whom are not very nice.

I do use education level as a blunt instrument (based on last experience of what I’m likely to have in common with a potential date) to try and narrow down the search.

It doesn’t mean I absolutely wouldn’t date someone who doesn’t have a masters degree or whatever if I met them and I liked them.

But with online dating the problem is you have to select people somehow before you can speak to them on a lot of apps so you have to base your choice on limited info to start with.

MrsBerthaRochester · 02/12/2021 11:23

I had a job which didnt reflect my education and I loved it. So I do appreciate doing the job because you enjoy it/its less stressful.
But the simple fact is when I have gone on dates with guys who are less educated it has put me off.
Im planning to remain single for the rest of my life though so the binmen of Britain are safe.

SlipperFeet · 02/12/2021 11:23

BIL is a binman - salary is decent, good hours and at Christmas time he gets absolutely hundreds in tips. He also brings home tonnes of booze, quality street etc and ends up with so much that he donates it to us Grin

papayaorange · 02/12/2021 11:24

Of course!

lockitdown · 02/12/2021 11:25

The upsides of having a binman partner were:

  • start early, home early (especially on friday)
  • solid job with career progression prospects in local councils
  • quite good holiday allowances
  • perks with tips, house clearances
  • some interesting tales at the end of the day

Downsides

  • other people's snobbery
  • his obsession with not allowing a bin in the house
  • the pension is a bit crap
  • if he had stayed in the career, I suspect we wouldnt be as comfortable and I would still be in FT work in my 50;s
noblegreenk · 02/12/2021 11:25

Why is this even a question? Have you always been a massive snob?

Cheeseandlobster · 02/12/2021 11:25

@Spudlet

Having massaged a former binman - absolutely. He was a lovely chap and frankly, the physical nature of his job had done some very good things for him.
Massaged or messaged? Either way he sounds very nice Smile

I don't see my bin men very often but whenever I have I give way to their lorry (narrow road) and am met by smiles and waves. They are a jovial bunch and if they are like that at home too then I would be very lucky to be in a relationship with one. I imagine life would be a lot of fun wth someone like that. Though the early starts might be a challege as I am a night owl

Glassofshloer · 02/12/2021 11:27

With some of these comments, it doesn’t surprise me there are so many ‘39, single and panicking’ threads.

GetTheFlockOutOfHere · 02/12/2021 11:27

@Birdsnesting

No. As I said on the other thread, my utterly lovely FiL is a retired binman, and we have two streetsweepers and a crusher driver in the family -- I've seen up close the toll heavy repetitive manual work takes on bodies as they age (and his generation was before wheelie bins, where you were hoisting heavy metal bins and throwing the contents into the truck). The agonising back problems he's experienced as he's got older I wouldn't wish on any one.
But it's not like that for them now. It's mostly wheelie bins everywhere -so it's easy for them to take the bin(s) to the refuse truck, and the truck does all the work of lifting the bin(s) in. The job is not as hard as it used to be.
londonrach · 02/12/2021 11:28

Why wouldn't you? If he a nice person. He employed. A friend of mine had a horrible ex and about five years ago meet amazing man who treats her and her previous DC and their DC really well and works long hours and still kind and lovely man. Guess his job...binman. he honestly is lovely and see so happy to have meet a lovely man.

passionfruitpizza · 02/12/2021 11:28

They do one of the most important jobs in the country so I don't get why anyone wouldn't.

TomelettewithGreggs · 02/12/2021 11:28

I have been married 24 years.

Women on this thread should be more open minded and consider men who are not "hot" or " nice looking"..Ugly men deserve dates too 🙂

GetTheFlockOutOfHere · 02/12/2021 11:29

@Glassofshloer

With some of these comments, it doesn’t surprise me there are so many ‘39, single and panicking’ threads.
Yeah this. ^ There is some dreadful snobbery on here towards 'binmen' (and FYI, women do the job too!)

Mumsnet never fails to deliver!

Megan1992xx · 02/12/2021 11:29

If he produced the goods in the relationship loving, respectful and most importantly performed between the sheets definitely.

GetTheFlockOutOfHere · 02/12/2021 11:29

@TomelettewithGreggs

I have been married 24 years.

Women on this thread should be more open minded and consider men who are not "hot" or " nice looking"..Ugly men deserve dates too 🙂

What? Has someone said binmen are ugly?
DaisyNGO · 02/12/2021 11:30

Forever " I had a relationship with someone previously who had a job rather than a career. Didn’t bother me. However, as time went on, I found she also had no desire to better herself, push herself, try new things, help make a better life for us."

are you my ex? The better life bit doesn't apply because I dumped him before we got very far. I didn't want a career coach, which was how I felt dating him.

Fluffymule · 02/12/2021 11:30

@Youseethethingis

Everyone likes to think of themselves as a "key worker" these days but when the bin men go on strike we see who really is the backbone of this country.
I always think of workers like the bin men/women, drivers, public transport workers, food production staff and countless other occupations that have had no option to work from home during this pandemic.

They've just continued to get up every day (or night for many shift workers) and just go out and get on with it. Keeping the fabric of our society functioning and safe and convenient.

Not so many people out clapping for them, or giving them priority in queues or online discounts for goods. Frontline NHS staff absolutely deserve this recognition, it's just a pity more people perhaps don't appreciate the contribution made by others.

stayathomer · 02/12/2021 11:31

Are you asking would I date someone hardworking with a solid job?!

TomelettewithGreggs · 02/12/2021 11:32

@GettheFlockoutofHere No. Rather the opposite. You will have to read the thread. :)

stayathomer · 02/12/2021 11:33

Not so many people out clapping for them, or giving them priority in queues or online discounts for goods.
Last year we stuck a new thank you note on our bin every week. They used to beep at the house as they drove away. Lovely guys