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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you date a binman?

641 replies

TrishM80 · 02/12/2021 09:17

Inspired by another thread about being a binman as a career.

You meet a guy on a night out or OLD. Seems nice enough and nice looking, all good. Tells you he's a binman.

YABU - immediate turn off
YANBU - give him a chance

OP posts:
Cutelittlesquizzer · 02/12/2021 13:27

I would. It’s an important, worthwhile job and not an easy or pleasant one so hats off to anyone who does it. As long as he is a good person who I get on with well and im attracted to them that’s fine by me.

Terminallysleepdeprived · 02/12/2021 13:33

Who in their right mind makes a dating choice basednon someone's job? What happened to physical attraction, things in common etc??

I know someone who has a PhD and currently works in the bin lorries. A job is a job. He has a child with his ex that needs supporting so he took this as it meant he could provide both in time and presence. He is no less a person than another friend who is the MD of a big firm!

Mantlemoose · 02/12/2021 13:35

Anyone who said they wouldn't purely because of their job I definately wouldn't date because that makes you an embarrassment to society.

Pawprintpaper · 02/12/2021 13:45

@KittytheHare

As long as he had cor blimey trousers I wouldn't mind.
Xmas Grin
hangrylady · 02/12/2021 13:47

@DillonPanthersTexas

I'd rather date a bin man than an investment banker

Why?

Experience
Trisolaris · 02/12/2021 13:48

I wouldn’t write them off if otherwise there seemed a connection between us but I think we’d be unlikely to be compatible as the type of work I’m passionate about is very different and I tend to be attracted to people whose minds work in similar ways. I also hate early mornings so that could be a problem.
Also Is Richard Curtis reading this thread? It feels like the women of mumsnet want a dustbin man in the next rom com. . .

Oblomov21 · 02/12/2021 13:58

How long is a shift? How come Muzzy's Dh was back home after only 4.5 hours work?

DillonPanthersTexas · 02/12/2021 13:59

Also Is Richard Curtis reading this thread? It feels like the women of mumsnet want a dustbin man in the next rom com. . .

Hugh Grant the bin man, can't see it myself

TheSimpleSage · 02/12/2021 14:10

A hilarious read. The responses here seem to largely be a combination of

  • sweeping generalisations based on no empirical evidence eg "being a binman provides a good income...."
  • virtue signalling; "as long as they are kind then yes of course, I wouldn't judge a partner on their career/job choice..."
  • bigotry; "I would date a binman but not a Tory..."
  • fantasy; "i know x number of binmen and they have PHDs/Masters but they just happen to choose to be binmen"
Rivermonsters · 02/12/2021 14:24

@TheSimpleSage I agree, the left are obsessed with us…shows a lot about them

gamerchick · 02/12/2021 14:28

@forinborin

I think you’d bore my bin men to tears. But then it's a win-win that I am not prepared to consider a relationship with them. Wink
Be fucked without them though. A need to have in your life but not worth knowing as people.

Weird world man Grin

ArdeaCinerea · 02/12/2021 14:29

I wouldn't be bothered by a man's employment as a binman, although it probably means he's a morning person and we would be incompatible for that reason. I haven't been awake before 8 since I was a schoolgirl.

On the other hand, take it from me and please avoid anyone who is in a band, especially if they're the drummer or the lead singer.

UsernameInTheTown · 02/12/2021 14:30

Yes. Round here they are fit and lovely and friendly.
Why wouldn't you? I assume they wash their hands between handling bins and furtling down your knickers?

Hoolahupsaresquare · 02/12/2021 14:32

The thing is I wouldn’t judge a partner on their job.

I have 2 degrees and a “professional job”. I earn peanuts and I don’t enjoy my job very much.

My friend did similar to me at university but then went to work at a food and drink chain place until he worked out what he wanted to do.

He was promoted repeatedly and ended up manager for a large part of the UK. He earns easily double what I do.

Another friend I know works in a shop despite having a degree and having worked in her field for a decade. Because she absolutely hated her job and it took a huge toll on her MH. She’s a lot happier now although she does earn less money.

It’s not exactly cut and dried with jobs. People may do then because they like them, for the money or because they don’t know what else they’d be good at and I don’t think its a very good way to judge a person.

Maybe it they worked in a slaughterhouse because they enjoy killing things - then I’d be concerned but otherwise probably not.

OnwardsAndSideways1 · 02/12/2021 14:38

In OLD which the OP mentions in her post, there are certain keywords/professions which score much higher than others, you can google these. Binman is not one of them.

This would be so easy to test. Same profile, job different, one puts 'finance director' the other puts 'binman', see how many people respond. I'm not even going to bother to do this experiment though, because I know the answer.

I don't personally go for finance guys or binmen in general, those aren't people I'd have a lot in common with, but I'm not stupid enough to deny incredible social pressure around class, money, ambition and so on. In fact, it's worse on OLD than anywhere as you can't get to know someone, or see if you have chemistry, or get a good impression of their personality, it's just a list of attributes and so job becomes even more important as a social signifier.

Chunkymenrock · 02/12/2021 14:47

Anyone in paid employment has my respect.

Lampzade · 02/12/2021 14:49

Yes

CaputApriDefero · 02/12/2021 14:49

My husband worked as a bin man for a year and he's sexy enough to be on a poster and lovely enough that I married him. I'd have gone to my own wedding in the bin lorry if it was the only way to marry him

Do not date this man. You seem shallower than a dish of sour milk and he sounds like he deserves better

Triphazards · 02/12/2021 14:51

I'd consider a bin woman.

CaputApriDefero · 02/12/2021 14:51

Sorry, realise this is hypothetical! I currently have concussion so I blame that! 😂

BUT- anyone who is thinking it's reasonable to be disgusted by a binman, see the above

TomelettewithGreggs · 02/12/2021 14:54

@TheSimpleSage

A hilarious read. The responses here seem to largely be a combination of
  • sweeping generalisations based on no empirical evidence eg "being a binman provides a good income...."
  • virtue signalling; "as long as they are kind then yes of course, I wouldn't judge a partner on their career/job choice..."
  • bigotry; "I would date a binman but not a Tory..."
  • fantasy; "i know x number of binmen and they have PHDs/Masters but they just happen to choose to be binmen"
I really wouldn't date a Tory, bigotry or not. But I agree with you on the rest. There appear to be an amazing number of binmen on this thread with PHD's. Also everybody thinks all binmen are lovely and friendly and cheery, based on a morning wave. It is a bit like thinking all immigrants are happy and jolly and hard working. ( I am one, and we are not ). A lot of virtue signalling, IMO.
Ceramide · 02/12/2021 15:02

No bin women?

TheSimpleSage · 02/12/2021 15:03

@Rivermonsters I wasn't actually implying I am on the right. Simply that intolerance of someone based purely on their political leanings, left or right, is not a good behaviour to adopt.

TomelettewithGreggs · 02/12/2021 15:06

Why can't we be intolerant of people's political leanings? Honestly, the policing of people's dating choices is odd. We should all be able to date whomever we want. I wouldn't be able to date someone who is anti-vaxx, for instance.

TheSimpleSage · 02/12/2021 15:18

@TomelettewithGreggs because being intolerant of someone's political views, as long as they are well meaning/rational and grounded in evidence, is rather extreme and authoritarian.

We should tolerate them, but we don't have to respect them. Massive difference.