To wonder how much it takes before the police...

[HerRoyalHappiness]

Take stalking seriously?

I began talking to a guy. He told me after 2 days he was in love with me. We'd never met and only ever spoke on Snapchat, where I have my location turned off. I never gave him any details except my first name.
I told him that was creepy and moving waaaaay to fast and told him I was blocking him. I then blocked him.

I thought that was the end of it.

Then he popped up in my message requests on Facebook, so he'd found my surname.

I ignored and blocked and reported it to the police.

Since then I've had to block 16 fake accounts that he's set up on Facebook and Snapchat.

I've reported every single one to the police including the message "do you know who I am. I found you on here didn't I, watch out"

And the police still "cant" do anything.

How much more am I going to have to deal with before its taken seriously? What if he finds my address? I'm alone with 3 children.

Hes clearly deranged enough to harass me and right now I wouldn't put anything past him. I've begun sleeping with a knife in my bedroom just in case.

I shouldn't have to lice like this. In constant fear of a man I've never met.

AIBU to think online harassment and stalking should be taken more seriously?

@RoseRedRoseBlue thank you I'll check them out

What did the police actually say?

SM/Online - anyone can be anything and use any picture as their profile. It may or may not be who you know but if they were trying to fool you, I doubt they'd use their real picture or name.

I agree the police should be taking this more seriously especially given the repeated attempts now. It's sad that some things are left to get to a certain level for that to happen (and sometimes it may be too late).

I do agree with the poster who's telling you to protect yourself (and your children) for now. The same advice would apply even if you were a man being harassed by another man.

I don’t blame the Police for not doing anything if you’re not prepared to take sensible and reasonable steps yourself.

I was advised to lock down my social media by the police. I did. He still sent requests on Snapchat. He's persistent. Stop victim blaming and start wondering why any man would harass someone like this in the first place. I shouldn't have to protect myself. The police should be doing that, it's literally their job to protect the public.

Wow you have so much always going on in your life!
Sorry about this!

Can you reverse Google search his image? That might help you identify the fucker. Not that it's up to you to do that but the more info you have about him and can report the better. Sorry you have to go through this. What a gobshite.

Why do people keep telling the OP to get off social media? These days, social media is not just fun but it can be essential to your career and to keeping in touch with friends and family. Without it, the OP might be v isolated and unable to reach friends for help if needed.

Women should not have to delete social media to deal with stalkers.

@HerRoyalHappiness
That unless he approaches me in real life there's nothing that they can do except log every incident. So that's what I'm doing. They suggested locking down accounts. I did. They suggested blocking him. I have repeatedly. They told me to buy a camera. I have a ring doorbell. I've done everything the police have suggested yet he's still carrying on.
I still don't feel safe in my own home. And coming off SM wouldn't change that.

So much victim blaming on this thread. I’ve reported. So sorry you are having to deal with this OP. And yes, the police should be doing more to ensure your safety.

Sorry, meant to tag @Nicknacky in that.

@Weznn what's that meant to mean?

I would also be worried that if you DID disappear from SM that he would escalate in order to maintain contact.

Honestly they usually do nothing until it’s too late

[quote HerRoyalHappiness]@2bazookas I've seen a picture he uses on SM, but im face blind thanks to being autistic so I could well have met him before and just don't remember. I'll ask around about him to see if he rings a bell with anyone.[/quote]
The name and photo he showed on SM, might not be his of course.

Ask your friends if anyone has casually mentioned you to them lately.

Him harassing you is clearly not ok on any level, but you’re making it easy for him by retaining your social media. You’re being incredibly naïve if you think you shouldn’t take any steps to protect yourself.

I'm not being naive. I. Maintaining my social life. I'm disabled and only able to contact friends and most of my family via SM. I'm autistic and struggle with social interaction as it is. SM makes it easy for me. I already suffer severely with depression and removing myself from SM would enhance that. I'm not putting my mental health on the line when the police should be stepping up and doing more to help.

I was stalked years ago. He followed me to work. I told security. They called the cops. I had police patrol me home. I wasn't allowed out of the building alone. I was escorted home. I had cops on the bus with me and 3 cars following the bus for a week. They found him and were ready for a trial but my dad died and I just couldn't handle it. Long story short, the cops were brilliant and I'm very grateful.

@Totaldick I'm glad they helped you. That's amazing that they caught him before you got hurt. I'm sorry about your dad though

Sorry to interrupt your thread, OP, we just wanted to remind everyone that we do not advocate victim blaming on Mumsnet. We will remove victim-blaming posts, so please do report any of these that you see, and we will take a closer look.

@ClaraMumsnet

Sorry to interrupt your thread, OP, we just wanted to remind everyone that we do not advocate victim blaming on Mumsnet. We will remove victim-blaming posts, so please do report any of these that you see, and we will take a closer look.

Oh good, some dreadful posts on here!

Thank you Clara

How come the police have no interest in things like this but will drive across the country and turn up at a woman's door over a tweet?

Thank you Clara

I can’t imagine how frightening this must be for you and yes I think the police should take this more seriously.
Is there any chance that you do actually know him and he’s used a fake photo? Disgruntled ex , someone you have had a disagreement with (it could be a female) .

It wouldn’t matter if you removed yourself from social media platforms. Sounds like he is putting effort into tracking you, so who's to know if once you’re off social media, he will turn up at your door instead? A lot of stalkers turn out to be people you already know, so he could know where you live. It must be terrifying to be looking over your shoulder all the time, looking at people and wondering if it’s them.