Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be fed up with the lazy graduates I work with....

236 replies

H0bnob · 30/11/2021 11:31

And I say this as an early 20s recent graduate myself! So many young people both in my immediate team and within my department seem to have such a shocking attitude to work I'm finding it really grating. Most of these people have just finished there degree/masters and have never had to work before now and the attitude it just shocking!

To add to this, everyone seems to have anxiety and depression to some degree. I am absolutely NOT dismissing mental health issues and having lived with several i know how debilitating they can be....but to use it as an excuse to get out of everything is just taking the piss....being too lazy to do your job is not the same thing as being depressed, grow up for Christ's sake and take some responsibility.

One of my colleagues (same age as me) has had almost 20 sick days in the last 6 months for mental health...and yet goes out drinking and taking drugs every weekend without failure. When said colleague is in they also do nothing but sit on their phone and complain about being bored and tired. My managers seem reluctant to do anything too with the worry of accidental discrimination and so the rest of us are forced to continuously pick up the slack. Its really doing my head in now, am I being hugely intolerant?? Fully prepared to be told I I as obviously you never know what's going on behind the scenes but christ this is relentless! Apologies this has turned into a proper rant im just so frustrated by society at the minute.

OP posts:
Babybooboodedoo · 30/11/2021 16:44

Some people will always push against boundaries and see what they can get away with, but that’s not your problem to manage (I’m assuming you’re not a manager yet).

I think you should focus on the positives in this situation. Use this to your advantage and get yourself noticed as the dedicated hard worker. Forget about what they’re doing and be grateful that you are not facing stiff competition as you will climb the ranks faster.

Be careful not to get bogged down into the minutiae of your day job, gossiping and tittle tattle because it won’t make you look good- even if you’re right. Instead think long term and strategically. Remember that you have two jobs to manage- your day job and your career. For the former, set boundaries and keep communicating with your line manager. For the latter, a growth mindset and seeing learning opportunities from situations like these will make you stronger and progress faster.

Brainstorm21 · 30/11/2021 16:46

I'd say the truth is somewhere in between hopeless staff and hopeless management. Where I work at least 2 of our team of 6 are genuinely hopeless at their jobs.

1 is a 'trier' and does his level best despite being completely unqualified for his job.

The other is permanently off ill with various ailments but has no problem going out every weekend. Has come into the office drunk, on customer calls drunk etc.

Management/HR really need to get a grip on them and try to diagnose whether there is a genuine health / mental health issue or whether they are just a lazy arsehole.

It's been 9 years so I'm not holding my breath..

VoluptuaGoodshag · 30/11/2021 16:50

It’s the L’Oréal effect. So many entitled folk nowadays who think a certain way of behaving is ok ‘because they are worth it’.

That said, I’m in my 50s and used to work in the public sector and there were always slackers pulling sickies who were carried by others who worked hard. It used to really piss me off that they always got away with it. I eventually moved into the private sector where hard work was rewarded and slackers got a boot up the arse.
Don’t know what it’s like now but a friend who works in HR says that in many cases where a line manager tries to pull someone up about slacking or whatever they’ll be accused of bullying and slacker goes off with stress.

Even during the first lockdown I felt I was being had. Our community pulled together to match vulnerable people with folk who could get their shopping/medicine/errands. I got a call from a lady that I never actually saw. She lived in a flat with a security door which I would buzz then she would leave her shopping list and money outside her door for me. Said she couldn’t go out because of her mental health issues. This arrangement went on for weeks but I started to notice that she wanted more and more stuff bought, and it had to be a certain brand of pizza coz that’s all her son ate. Then she was adding 8 cans of a certain type of beer coz that’s what her husband liked. I had assumed she was totally on her own but unless they all had mental health issues then surely one of them could have nipped to the shop. Instead of getting a few bits and pieces for her I was doing a huge family shop at shops I normally wouldn’t go to. When dog food and cat was added I realised that somebody must’ve been going out to walk the dog so her ‘I cannot go outside’ didn’t really ring true. I eventually stopped the arrangement when restrictions eased a bit and she said oh that’s fine I’ll just get the shopping delivered from Asda.

Squashpocket · 30/11/2021 16:51

This has been driving mad recently, so I'm going to say it even though I'm sure I'll get my arse handed to me...

Say you lack focus at work (because it's mind numbingly fucking boring and your boss doesn't appreciate you) and you Google strategies to help you manage your lack of productivity - 99% guarantee Google will tell you you've got ADHD.

Or you're only 23 and you have to go to a networking event with 50 other 45 year old professionals who know their stuff and probably each other. You feel bone crushingly awkward. Google tells you you're autistic.

So rather than develop strategies to manage these totally normal, unpleasant life events you diagnose yourself with a disorder and bingo! Now you don't have to improve yourself and it's everyone else's problem.

PlumManor · 30/11/2021 16:52

I don’t think it’s generational either. I do work with some entitled graduates who aren’t prepared to start before 9 or finish after 5 and expect a top whack salary because they have a degree.

I also work with some people my own age and older who have managed 40
years in this business by being totally and utterly useless and when they weren’t useless they were off sick.

As a parent we need to build resilience in our children and prepare them for the realities of work as soon as they are able. Saturday jobs, paper rounds, part time work around uni if that’s where they end up. We should also be making it clear to our children That university is not necessarily the right route to a happiness, and a good well paid job.

There must be 1000s of people that would have been happier, more fulfilled and better paid if they done a vocational route to employment.

And I
Might be able to get a plumber Grin

Puzzledandpissedoff · 30/11/2021 16:59

Yes it is public sector

Quelle surprise Hmm

Back with your original question, graduates vary like everyone else and you'll get slackers along with the countless excellent ones
Unfortunately, IME too many slackers are drawn to the public sector precisely because they know there's little chance of anyone taking the responsibility for dealing with them

Lotusmonster · 30/11/2021 17:00

I’m sorry but the small matter of a global pandemic meaning mainly online teaching, self isolation and no graduation ceremonies plus the same debts plus lecturer strikes has probably left its mark on the mental health of cohorts x 24 months!!! Are you really surprised at that as well as the pitiful access to MH referral services across the UK. Sorry OP I find your ‘snap out of it’ mentality a bit shit.

IfNot · 30/11/2021 17:00

I work with several people in their early twenties and they are all admirably bright eyed, bushy tailed, intelligent and hard working. They amaze me actually. At 22 I could hardly get out of bed before noon. And why the “ public sector “ comments? It’s not all tea breaks and work to rule now you know! Public sector orgs like the NHS and the civil service squeeze the most work out of you for the lowest pay possible, it’s relentless ( and yes I have worked in the private sector extensively).
If I were you OP I would mind your own business.

LowlandLucky · 30/11/2021 17:02

Too many people (of all ages) use the MH excuse these days and it make it so hard for those that do suffer MH issues. The shirkers know that MH issues can't be disproved. They also know how bad it looks if anyone calls them out on their piss taking ways. It is a ticket to a free rode. At the same time the slightest negative emotion is seen as a MH issue, a bit of stress, nervousness, being a bit fed up or down. These are normal everyday run of the mill emotions not MH problems.

peaceanddove · 30/11/2021 17:05

Oh it's the public sector? What a surprise Hmm

EightWheelGirl · 30/11/2021 17:16

I’ve often found new graduates to be much more immature than those who went into trade apprenticeships at 16yo. The latter would have actually been out there working when the graduates were only just starting their degrees, which is often the first time they’ve had to do their own laundry etc.

swimlyn · 30/11/2021 17:17

@Squashpocket

This isn't new. People have always been outstandingly lazy and self-centred I'm afraid.

Some grow out of it, some don't. Welcome to real life. It's shit.

Pro tip - try not to procreate with one of them, otherwise you'll have to deal with lazy entitled shits at home AND in the office.

From my experience, this sums it up perfectly. Smile

Some people think they are special. They aren't.

Squashpocket · 30/11/2021 17:19

What public sector organisations are pp working for where they don't have to do any work? I've worked in private organisations and an NHS hospital. The hospital was the most ludicrously understaffed, underpaid, busiest department I have ever worked for. I was expected to do a job typically designated to 3 people in private organisations. It was a total shitshow.

Teaching looks like a fucking nightmare as well, not that I've ever tried it.

H0bnob · 30/11/2021 17:23

Thank you for your concern. I think I have it covered though ❤

OP posts:
peaceanddove · 30/11/2021 17:23

I have made it clear to our DDs the difference between sometimes feeling anxious (perfectly natural reaction to certain things) and the hugely over touted I have anxiety phenomena.

Plus, both our DDs will be graduates but they have been raised in a school of (fairly) hard knocks because DH owns a successful company - he doesn't suffer fools, and hard work and commitment is always expected. They know what will be expected of them in the real world of work.

They've both had Saturday jobs since they were 13 and we drilled it into them that they had a real responsibilty to show up and be switched on. Too many of the teens they worked with were unreliable and flakey and their parents happily enabled them e.g. teen stayed up late playing on PS so too tired to get out of bed for work Hmm

JudgeJ · 30/11/2021 17:26

@PAFMO

You are SO dismissing mental health issues. That said, unless you are their line manager, it's none of your business why people are off sick. If your work is suffering, then speak to your manager. Obviously, without the playground name-calling and dissing of MH issues and tattling about drugs etc.
The OP isn't dismissing mental health issues, she is simply stating that 'anxiety' and 'stress' have come to replace 'being a bit fed up' or 'being totally pissed off' and are deemed to be untouchable, as your post clearly shows. It the absentees are seen out and about drinking and taking drugs then it's hardly tattling, it's being pissed off at their abuse of their colleagues.
Thecurliestwurly · 30/11/2021 17:28

@1967buglet

I’m not sure why, but the past five years teaching university has been like this…loads of MH issues, and we of course have had to accommodate (and gladly, because the vast vast majority are quite genuine). I acknowledge there are a few that may be taking the piss, but there have been increased numbers of student suicides, and there is some real suffering out there. It is a difficult situation, and COVID didn’t help. I guess I would ask us all to think about growing up in a recession with housing prices out of reach, going to uni in a pandemic, and starting a first job in a pandemic. It isn’t great for young people today.
This poster has a good point. You can't compare between generations and to be honest, in my 25 years of working there are lazy shits from all generations and all education levels, and in both private and public sector (having worked in both, the private sector was far, far worse for people slacking off, particularly managers).

If you think it's graduates that are the issue, perhaps their courses are being mis-sold and our education system is not adequately preparing young people for work. When I was on my degree many of the students were doing their degree for a particular job, unaware that they needed to study a completely different degree and do extended post-grad study. When I was at school 25 years ago we just got work experience for two weeks and a mock interview. There was no exploring different career options, skills training and planning for your future, and my parents were particularly crap at doing this at home - any job would have done for them. It's sad that this still appears to be the case.

H0bnob · 30/11/2021 17:29

Unclench my dear one is coming across as a bit of a patronising old cow! This post is not about grammar, it's about my useless colleagues. I have a very solid grasp of the English language...I just dont feel the need to be too pedantic about it on an anonymous forum, far better things to worry about!

OP posts:
H0bnob · 30/11/2021 17:30

For some reason it's not letting me quote posts on my phone but both other those were for @Cam77...just so you don't feel ignored!

OP posts:
Puzzledandpissedoff · 30/11/2021 17:32

In fairness, Squashpocket, I'd suggest that there's less potential for slacking at the sharp end of teaching, the NHS and so on - IME at least it tends to centre on admin roles, the civil service, local authorities and so on

My own experience was in social services, where the director of "children looked after" wanted a full time PA purely because that's what every other director had - something I learned after just three days when I'd already cleared an alleged huge backlog, discovered there was nothing else to do and suggested fewer hours

It was the only job I ever walked out of in my life ...

H0bnob · 30/11/2021 17:32

Interesting reading through these replies (am working my way through slowly whilst making dinner). It does seem to be a very universal problem. I really hate how mental health has become the go to excuse now for when you're just not feeling it...as mentioned by a PP it takes away from people who genuinely struggle and makes it so hard to differentiate between them and the piss takers

OP posts:
DottyHarmer · 30/11/2021 17:33

I agree with @Squashpocket that there is an epidemic of self-diagnosis or diagnosing others with scant reason. Even on MN every other post is greeted before long with “Have you thought about adhd?” Every bit of arseholey behaviour is excused with “I have anxiety” as if it’s this massive total Top Trumps card which beats everything. Show me the person who is never anxious, worried, nervous or uncertain and I’ll show you a potato. Everyone experiences these emotions. Some do indeed suffer terribly, and I really do know this , but most are just normal .

On another point, I read that a huge number of civil service applicants are declaring themselves as MH/adhd/autism spectrum/various binaries on the application form. Why is obvious You want to make the sift. Every applicant knows this. You might not make it all the way, but having something protects you from the first round of binned applications.

30whatacrock · 30/11/2021 17:34

@H0bnob

And I say this as an early 20s recent graduate myself! So many young people both in my immediate team and within my department seem to have such a shocking attitude to work I'm finding it really grating. Most of these people have just finished there degree/masters and have never had to work before now and the attitude it just shocking!

To add to this, everyone seems to have anxiety and depression to some degree. I am absolutely NOT dismissing mental health issues and having lived with several i know how debilitating they can be....but to use it as an excuse to get out of everything is just taking the piss....being too lazy to do your job is not the same thing as being depressed, grow up for Christ's sake and take some responsibility.

One of my colleagues (same age as me) has had almost 20 sick days in the last 6 months for mental health...and yet goes out drinking and taking drugs every weekend without failure. When said colleague is in they also do nothing but sit on their phone and complain about being bored and tired. My managers seem reluctant to do anything too with the worry of accidental discrimination and so the rest of us are forced to continuously pick up the slack. Its really doing my head in now, am I being hugely intolerant?? Fully prepared to be told I I as obviously you never know what's going on behind the scenes but christ this is relentless! Apologies this has turned into a proper rant im just so frustrated by society at the minute.

I’m not surprised your colleague has mental health problems if they are taking drugs every weekend. I don’t think you’re being intolerant. Many youngsters seem to wear self diagnosed anxiety as a badge of honour.

Clearly there are people who do genuinely suffer from anxiety and mental health problems, but I don’t think it’s helpful for youngsters to just decide themselves they are mentally unwell. I don’t think social media helps as it gives them the impression that anything other than a perfect and happy life 24/7, means their life is shit.

lightisnotwhite · 30/11/2021 17:38

@PAFMO

You are SO dismissing mental health issues. That said, unless you are their line manager, it's none of your business why people are off sick. If your work is suffering, then speak to your manager. Obviously, without the playground name-calling and dissing of MH issues and tattling about drugs etc.
I remember the big push to understand depression wasn’t the same as being sad. So no one is depressed anymore they are anxious. Now we need a message to say the clinical anxiety is not the same as stressed.

Luckily “Resilience” is the fashionable term for coping. I see most of the world living in utterly shit conditions and getting on with it because that’s all they can do.

vickyp0llard · 30/11/2021 17:44

Say you lack focus at work (because it's mind numbingly fucking boring and your boss doesn't appreciate you) and you Google strategies to help you manage your lack of productivity - 99% guarantee Google will tell you you've got ADHD.

Haha, this is exactly my situation! I hate my job and always have done, in hindsight it wasn't a great career choice because it's quite dull and not very sociable. Whenever I ask people for alternate career ideas and outline the issues (lack of motivation, WFH consists mainly of watching YouTube and going on Reddit), I always get told it must be ADHD. I'm planning to get tested for it anyway, but surely everyone who finds their office job dull and slacks off when they get the chance can't all have ADHD?

Some jobs are just boring and some people put in the minimum effort because they don't want to work - but they have to in order to pay their bills and fund their life! I fully put my hands up to being one of those slackers, but I don't blame it on MH problems or demand a top salary. I accept there won't be any promotions heading my way! For those of us who just don't enjoy working.....what do you actually suggest we do? I can't conjure up motivation out of nowhere, I can't afford to retrain, I can't quit work or just be a benefits cheat, too late to find a rich husband, can't really top myself.....so my current solution is to clock in but just do as little as I can get away with.