My aunt doesn't want me to bring my dog to Christmas day

[onethickpony]

My Aunt has told me that she doesn't want me to bring my dog on Christmas day. There are going to be 22 of us so I can understand maybe she is worried about it being overwhelming, but my dog is very clean and well behaved and has been at most large family gatherings without issue.

Should I just respect her wishes or AIBU to push back and least ask why? Sad to think of my dog alone on xmas day (yes i am a crazy pet parent).

@PurpleDaisies César Felipe Millán Favela is a Mexican-American dog trainer with over 25 years of canine experience.

He's a well-respected internationally recognised dog trainer. And he would be able to help posters on here to train their dogs to be home for the work day without anyone needing to quit their job because they have a dog and mistakenly think the dog can't be alone between the hours of 8:30am and 5:30pm (or average full day at work/day out visiting friends). www.cesarsway.com/
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cesar_Millan

So true! A 'friendly' dog is often one which comes up to you, licks you, sticks its nose in your crotch and leaps up at you, or even just stands at your feet wagging it's tail. None of which I want. If I am round dogs I want one which is aloof. Not violent but absolutely not friendly

This is the reason I don’t go to my parents house very often!
Their dog is mental on the friendly stakes. He won’t leave visitors alone, he’ll jump up, encroaches on your space by pushing in to you, trying to lick your face and hands and will try every which way to climb on top of you. Wouldn’t be as bad if it were a small dog but it’s a Great big Golden Retriever that weighs twice as much as I do!

I have to sit with my hand on him keeping him at arms length for the whole time I’m there otherwise I’ll end up covered in dog hair and slobber. Also when he gets excited he secretes a god awful smell which transfers to your clothes. (Clothes have to go straight in the wash if dog had contact)
As a cat owner I really don’t want to go home stinking of dog as my cats won’t come near me!

One time my dd aged about 9 or 10 got knocked clean over the back of the corner sofa when he jumped up on her and she landed in a heap on the floor!

But it’s ok he’s just being “friendly!” According to my dad!

Visiting is hard work!

If there is no alternative bring the dog with you. Leave it in the car & visit it at 30 minute intervals.

He's a well-respected internationally recognised dog trainer.

He isn't. He's a friend of celebrities who ended up on the tv, and has no qualifications in canine behaviour whatsoever. His methods are outdated and widely criticised.

Your dog isn’t a person. I’m a bit surprised you think he’d be welcome at a big family Christmas Day gathering in someone else’s house.

Maybe she doesn’t want dog smell or hair on her carpets or furniture, or an animal around the food and cooking, getting under peoples feet etc.

Maybe other guests aren’t comfortable around dogs or have babies/toddlers/young kids they don’t want in the same house as a dog.

No matter how cute and clean you think your pet is, he is still a pet and will smell of dog in a house of 22 people.

Definitely don’t ask why!!! As someone who doesn’t like dogs, there is nothing worse than being asked that, and then trying to find a reason for the owner to decide if it’s valid or not !!
Not everyone likes dogs or wants them in their house.

This new trend of treating dogs like humans is just ridiculous. No-one would expect to take their car or Guinea Pigs to someone else’s house on Christmas Day.

maybe it is like the new trend of letting kids run riot in public places with no thought of the other people, or letting them listen to blaring devices without consideration for others?

I wouldn’t want a dog in my house. Not everyone are ‘doggy people’. Plus, despite the protests of every dog owner I’ve ever met, their houses stink and I personally don’t want their smelly pets around. Maybe your aunt feels the same?

@Wheresmywoolyjumpers

This new trend of treating dogs like humans is just ridiculous. No-one would expect to take their car or Guinea Pigs to someone else’s house on Christmas Day.

maybe it is like the new trend of letting kids run riot in public places with no thought of the other people, or letting them listen to blaring devices without consideration for others?

Both of these things can be true at the same time. If you find the children-based annoyances irritating can’t you understand that others also find the dog-based annoyances inconsiderate too?

Just leave it.

If the house is nearby can you go back and let your dog out for a walk or wee etc half way through the day? I wouldn’t leave a dog longer than say 6 hours, but you can’t insist on taking it.

If I was your aunt and you decided to "push back" I would simply tell you that NO is a full sentence.

I love our dog, but wouldn't take her, or question it if someone didn't want us to bring her with us.

Have we scared the OP off?

In fairness, I think she acknowledged that maybe she was having second thoughts about 200 posts ago...

YABU. I wouldn’t want a dog in my house either. I don’t like the smell or the hairs. Maybe one of the attendees are allergic or afraid of dogs too. Not everyone likes dogs.

I'm usually the first to say of course you can't take your dog!

However I have experienced something similar and it did change my mind on a blanket no dogs rule. I don't have a dog, not overly a doggy person, but don't mind them if they are nice.

My aunt has a dog. Aunt is quite elderly and only has her dog for company. Its quite old too and small and quiet and just plods in and lays down and thats that. No bother, no fuss, you don't even know hes there.
Aunt hates leaving him and takes him everywhere and Id have no issue with him coming over with her at any time especially as it would mean she can relax and not worry about the dog.

So I think it most definitely does depend on the dog and the owner. I used to have a no dogs in my house at all stance, but I honestly don't mind this one.

But obviously OP if you have been asked not to bring the dog, you have to respect that, but don't think it would be rude to ask why not. Like you say it may be something he/she did once or it might be something like you accidentality missed clearing up a poo in the garden last time, in which case you can reassure won't happen again. You never know.

I'd rather stay at home with my dog, than go to a large family gathering. Definately wouldn't leave the dog alone all day.

"Should I just respect her wishes"

Are you for fucking real? It's her house!!

Both of these things can be true at the same time. If you find the children-based annoyances irritating can’t you understand that others also find the dog-based annoyances inconsiderate too?

Sure, but considering in the context of this being about a Christmas party, think it’s a completely different thing.

As someone who isn’t a dog fan at all, I really think you need to respect your aunt on this one. We have cats and neither me or DH or our kids are dog people. Nevertheless my brother in law and his wife often arrive unannounced with their big, annoying dog. We’ve started to ask them not to now but sometimes it’s hard to push back against when they’re on the doorstep with our niece snd nephew, which they know! I have no issue with other people having whatever pets they want but they slobber, they moult and they smell so I don’t want them in my house (especially alongside 22 people!) I wouldn’t rock up for Christmas dinner at someone else’s house with my four cats, I don’t think you should rock up with your dog.

Great, you have a convenient excuse not to go

I've got 'Do they know it's Christmastime at all' going round in my head now!

I wouldn’t want your dog in my house either. Or any other dog.

They stink to high heavens, yes yours too. They drool and slobber, sniff, lick, damage furniture, can have accidents, beg for food, jump up at people, can have “accidents”, can bite.

No thank you.

I would ask why. Also you're not supposed to leave a dog alone for more than three/four hours so it would be mean for your wee dog to leave him.

Of course you can't. She has a house full (and while you think the world shines out of its arse. She doesn't ) I wouldn't dream of taking mine and definitely not after she said no.