To fucking hate feeding my one year old

[cruffin]

She's so picky, throws it on the floor, what she will eat one day the next she doesn't. It's such a fucking chore and the food waste is awful. I absolutely hate it.

@cruffin

I just worry if I only give her what she wants she will have a diet that's too limited, everything you read says how important it is to expose baby to new flavours, textures etc.

Its crap. What most 1 yr olds want and like is soft pap; like baby rice, porridge, mashed banana, stewed apple, yoghurt, mashed potato with gravy, scrambled egg. Weetabix mashed with warm milk. Mashed carrots. Vegetable puree. Semolina. Junket. A leetle chicken passed through the moili with gravy. Either they like to have it spooned in like baby birds.; or they learn to spoon it in themselves.

Those are all perfectly nutritious foods that will sustain normal growth and development while introducing new flavours.

Sorry, hungry babies with few teeth do not much care to gnaw raw carrot sticks, slices of raw green pepper or apple, brocolli and cauliflower florets.

I found that setting up a picnic rug and doing a stuffed animal picnic for lunch really worked well. Little breadsticks, finger sandwiches etc. Give each toy their own bowl but don’t give child a bowl. Have a laugh with it. You’d be amazed at how much more he ate when he thought he was stealing the Pandas lunch

Let her ear when hungry. Keep offering, put something on plate you know she will eat. If she throws it take it away.

My dd is 23 months and is extremely picky!
She will only eat cheese, beans, boiled carrots, fruit and cereal! Unless she's at nursery and she eats almost everything they give her for lunch.

I usually try to give her a decent sized lunch of things I know she will eat and then at dinner time try her with some new things, with the option of a cheese sandwich or similar following the new foods (whether they're eaten or not)

It's just soul destroying when you make something from scratch that you think they should loved they don't even try it

I never make specific food for my children. It's too demoralising. They solely get what we eat. Otherwise I'd fully loose my shit. Had a huge row with my partner as he kept making different meals when they didn't eat what was in front of them. He agreed to stop doing it.

Toast, cheese and fruit sounds great to me. Just call it a ploughman's.

@2bazookas mine were the opposite. They loved and still love anything raw and crunchy, disliked cooked vegetables, and hated anything soft and pappy apart from breakfast cereal. Which just goes to show that you can’t generalise and have to take the lead from your own children.

I was frustrated first and then I realised that she didn't die of starvation when she didn't get her food immediately.
Also, she's fine, not obese and her teeth are great. She got a biscuit and chicken soup (the one we ate too, with salt and pepper and whatever else) when she refused to eat her other foods. Semolina with cinnamon and sugar or rice pudding. I decided to not force her to eat stuff she didn't want to and it worked better than a constant battle with a frustrated child and a frustrated mother at the end.
I don't agree with the not good old "they'll eat when they're hungry". My daughter would rather starve than eat some food and she could beat a donkey in stubbornness. I picked mine and food wasn't my area of choice.

Sorry, hungry babies with few teeth do not much care to gnaw raw carrot sticks, slices of raw green pepper or apple, brocolli and cauliflower florets.

My youngest did. He ate what we ate. My boys walked before they had teeth. Neither had teeth before 12 months and weren’t just eating soft foods. The youngest saw us eating at 6 months and was mimicking chewing and taking food off our plates so we let him have some within reason. No teeth didn’t stop them from eating harder foods.

Accept that she won't eat or even try everything you put in front of her. Continue to give her things she has previously refused. If you just give her what she wants then she's never going to have the exposure to a wider range and she'll end up with a limited diet. But with this approach you have to accept inevitable waste, so only small portions or as others have said give her what you're eating. Doesn't matter if it requires a spoon she can use her hands and that is ok. It is a really long game.....to put it in perspective my DD are rice happily up to about 18 months. Then she flat out refused it until the age of 3. It still went on her plate. The tide turned very slowly but it took about 2 years before she would eat it again. If I had stopped putting rice on her plate or an alternative she most likely would still hate it now.

Honestly I’d do cheese fruit and toast in various forms and then one or two days a week try new things

Don’t be so stressed by it that it’s affecting your life

@peggyjean

I just wanted to say thank you for this. I am a long time lurker but threads like these are the reason I love mumsnet - they seem to pop up and make you feel better you aren't alone with a problem at exactly the right time. I feel like all my friends' toddlers honk down huge portions of whatever is put in front of them, while I spend all my time making dear little fish pies and the like which get thrown on the floor. I started giving her pasta every night because i knew she would eat it...and then that stopped! she is also a fruit and cheese diet baby so i will cling to that for now! Anyway, thank you, I felt a rush of relief reading this x

@peggyjean solidarity! I know people mean well posting tips for me but I just wanted to rant really. I've tried literally everything suggested as I'm sure most of us struggling have!

My 2 year old is exactly the same. Cheese, bread, fruit, yoghurt (and any packaged snack). So frustrating. Prepare something she ate last week, utter refusal this week. We've just started saying "this is what we're having for dinner" and not getting her anything else (we would give her a "bedtime snack" a couple hours later if she really didn't eat anything). She actually tried something new yesterday for the first time in ages, I guess she was hungry enough and saw we weren't going to short order cook for her anymore... But it could also have been a one-off 😬

@Scrunchies

Just solidarity. I fucking hate it too and mines a nightmare. I tried to do all the right things, put in so much effort making elaborate foods, tried BLW too and that didn’t work, fucking trout risotto anyone? And she’s a nightmare. I’m angry and embarrassed and dread every meal.

@Scrunchies trout risotto has given me a good laugh thank you!

I’m glad I found this. Mine is 22 months old and is currently being as fickle as they come. He used to eat really well and is now getting hit and miss on anything I’ve actually cooked rather than merely heated (so pasta with pesto/plain sauce and peas is fine, spaghetti bolognese isn’t despite being his favourite until recently). Chicken curry and chicken Florentine are Totally Unacceptable and will not pass his lips. Ditto the rice pudding I made for him and DH at the weekend which DC won’t touch and DH forgot was there.

Older sibling is a very fussy eater still at 6 and I hate the thought of DC2 going the same way. Older sibling also snacks after school which is tricky to manage in terms of timings and DC2 wanting what DC1 has.

Some days I offer yogurt/banana/toast if asked for and/or I’m worried he’s hungry. Other days I don’t. I can confirm food doesn’t seem to affect sleep - he slept through the night on one bite of spag bol last night.

@peggyjean I know what you mean, sometimes I’ll be worrying about something specific like this, not sure whether to make a thread, then I look on mumsnet and someone else is posting about the same thing right now like they’ve read my mind. It does really help.

I also have a bread, yogurt and banana baby 😂 oh and crisps

I would definitely offer her a small portion of whatever your having at each meal time along with bits you know she will eat. As others have said, all food can be finger food except soup. Model good behaviours in yourself, ie. Letting her see you eat a variety of foods. And if she ever asks for your food give her some. If you accept the inevitable food waste, and that her diet isn't currently as varied as you'd like (but that it's ok), I'd hope you'll find meals times much less stressful.

If she only actually eats bread, cheese and fruit most days then really don't worry about it. The food waste is unfortunate as you offer her things she's not sure of but it's part of the process. I would recommend a multi vitamin or using toddler formula or something though if she's got a restricted diet as she might be lacking in some nutrients.

Also as an aside I tried to put myself in a baby's shoes when I was weaning my first. Imagine someone offered you a bowl of grey mush and told you to eat it. You don't know what's in it, and it's grey which is weird... And it's mushy which is also weird... How would you respond? You probably wouldn't dive in head first with excitement the first time.

Relax💐 no harm will come if they eat cheese, fruit and toast for every meal! Mine used to try new stuff we were eating if off our plate but frequently had variation of cheese cubes, chopped fruit, bread sticks (finger foods) sat in front of TV. (start small and restock the plate when all gone if they want more to reduce food waste) I lovingly made organic cauliflower cheese ect for the first one who ate virtually everything put in front of him he's now a massive carnivore🤔next two were fussier hence the picnics in front of TV but all grown up now and totally different tastes with the third being vegetarian. 😂

[quote rainyskylight]@romanroy don't feel bad - he's got norovirus! I had food poisoning this weekend and all I could manage for 3 days is apple juice and a tiny portion of bran flakes. don't be so mean to yourself![/quote]
Thank you! I know, it's ridiculous to worry but I still am.

We're on ritz and cream crackers now

Avoid those toddler formulas for age 1+ - they are completely unregulated, contain very little in the way of nutrients and are sweetened with a lot of sugar, so really bad for their teeth.

Normal cow's milk (full fat) is fine or sometimes continuing with ordinary baby formula is best (if their diet is very restricted/food intake very little) but you should speak to a doctor to confirm.

www.firststepsnutrition.org/parents-carers

Cool for yourself and give her bits to try, doing it this way is so less tedious as if they reject you’ve cooked it for yourself anyway