Santa letter and school AIBU

[Myotherusernameisbest]

DD came home from school yesterday and told me the teacher had asked them all to write letters to Santa. Its still November, but hey ho.
DD is 6.
The teacher then told them she would post them off.
I thought nothing more of it as assumed the letters would be shown to parents, so we've an idea whats on them.
But today I have seen an email from the school detailing their whole santa letter thing.
Apparantly, the letters are 'sent off'. parents don't see them. And not only that they have the year 4's (so 8 year olds) read the letters and reply as though they are santas elves.

I didn't know if I'm over reacting but I think its a bloody stupid idea because:

1. I usually write the santa letter with the DC so I've some control to a degree of what goes on it. And then I know that they will get at least a couple of things from their list. I have no idea whats on this list and DD is being a bit vague as to what she wrote on it.
2. It now means we won't write our own letter to santa because you can't write him mulitple letters!
3. Not showing it to parents - for the same reason above, so we have a chance of getting something off it.
4. Its still bloody november
5. Having 8 year olds reply to the letters, knowing they are from year 2's. My older ones still believed in santa at age 8, so this is basically telling them its not real. And I consider it lying to a degree as they are opening deceiving the year 2's.
6. DD believes in Santa and they are given the impression the replies come from the elves. But surely all it takes is one 8 year old to say to a younger sibling, oh our class were the ones that replied to your letters, not santas elves, and it will spread round the year 2's like wildfire?

Its apparently an exercise in letter writing for the year 2's and also year 4's. Oh and the year 4's will also be reading the replies to the year 2's and it will be accompanied by a video of santa which the year 4's make, basiclly also replying to their letter. They sent an example of the video and its really shit. Its like a floating santa head, theres not even a body. Its as fake as it comes.

So, should I go to the school and say what a stupid idea it is, or just leave it, or something inbetween?
And also I''m thinking when DD is in year 4, if she still believes in santa then and they do it every year apparantly, she'll then know the whole letter thing she did was a big massive fake.

I have no issue with the school asking them to draft letters to santa, but surely they should then bring them home for parents to look at (and suggest adjustments where needed!) and not do the whole reply shite. I mean what if the year 4's promise them they'll get the stuff on their list and DD has put something really expensive on there!

i wouldnt want my 8 yr old pretending to santa and maybe figuring out its all fake no

I agree it's a terrible idea but...

I REALLY want to see Freaky Santa Head

I would straight up say to yours that it’s not real and it’s just for school.

Even spin it as ‘he would send your presents to school instead of our house! Think really hard for this list and when we write our real list you’ll have lots of ideas.’

I wouldn't be happy and I wouldn't be lying to my children at home about it being real

I would have been the parent with a y4 and a yr 6 child. It'll get out....

What most unbelievable is that as it involves two year groups and the video head thing that must mean a group of teachers got together and decided it was all a great idea, maybe even put it to the Headteacher are all of them non parents? I can't believe anyone who has a child/knowledge of different Christmas traditions thought it was a good idea. As you said to teacher op it's a daft idea for kids whose parents don't do Santa letters/celebrate Christmas if the child now expects to "get something from him". That'd make me cross if was someone who didn't want my child believing in that stuff.

One of my DC write to the PM for the letter writing practice, the other sent a letter to Meghan and Harry for their wedding. They also hadtodo a balanced argument to their headteacher about extra break time or something similar.

Why not suggest to school a better letter writing practice would be to write a nice chatty letter to people in a local old folks home, thus teaching them to think of others at the festive time of year and not ask for stuff from a fiction character that puts pressure on parents to live up to possibly unachievable expectations...

This doesn't sound like it will end very well

YABU just get her to do one at home too.

Most kinds know they won’t get everything on their lists so just get her a few bits off the list she does with you. She probably won’t even remember what was on which list.

Hope this has added. When it talks it sort of bobs and swivels about. it’s 3d but there’s no body!

You know it’s not something I ever thought about until I worked with a teacher when I was a reception LSA and she said that she didn’t like doing letters to Santa at school, because the parents didn’t see them and the kids wouldn’t get things they put down.

Seriously? Massive overreaction. Just tell your kid it is just a practice task to work on letter writing. Job done.no need to rage and complain.

When ds2 was in nursery they wrote a letter to Santa, unknown to the parents, and on the last day of term came out with a reply saying Santa would do his best got the football he'd asked for.... A football?! He'd never mentioned a football at all and 3 days before Christmas i had to go out and buy a flipping football. I don't think Santa letters have a place in school at all.

Threads like these make me think that I'm massively out of step about 'Santa' with most people.

I genuinely don't see the issue. Of course you can get your child to write a second letter to Santa with whatever your tradition is. As PP said, tell them it was a practice or a school thing or Santa wanted an update.

If they've put something in the school letter you don't want to buy (for whatever reason), just don't buy it. Explain that they can't have everything/anything they asked for- the same way you would they talk about asking for a real unicorn at home. What difference does it make if they've written it down at school or said it to you before writing it at home?

Of course you can take your child to a pantomime as well as them going with school.

Of course you can take them to see Santa, even if they've seen a video call from one and if they're not bothered about seeing Santa twice then find something else they do want to do. There's plenty of Christmas activities.

Teachers and schools are very well practiced at managing children who do and don't believe and/or don't celebrate, they'll have a separate activity for those who actually object e.g. for religious reasons.

Its a fucking terrible idea; I would tell them so and refuse to take part.

What a crazy idea.

Utter madness.

I hated it when my kids school did Santa letters - we didn’t do letters at home, just sometimes asked then to think of one thing they’d like (we often went with surprises rather than asking them for requests). So the letter thing was a complete pain. It assumes that everyone has the same custom, which isn’t the case at all.

YANBU
It is also discriminatory towards children of different religious backgrounds where Santa does not exist and never has to ask them to “write a letter to Santa” and participate in a group delusion/lie.

I assume it’s a 100% white British school ?
This would culturally in sensitive in my school and my year 4 DS can’t write or read well enough and still believes so would be a disaster all round
Also expectations need to be managed !!

I’m so relaxed about silly Santa stuff, we don’t bother ourselves… but even I think that’s a bit batshit

This is ridiculous. School could just as easily do it as a 'practise exercise for those who want to write a letter to Santa at home' ...and also leave out all the batshit Y4 elf stuff.
Just idiotic. It would be so easy to do something that isn't a complete ballache for parents and they seem to have gone out their way to make an arse of things.

@ladygindiva

Its a fucking terrible idea; I would tell them so and refuse to take part.

Whilst I agree with your sentiment she can't 'refuse to take part' unless she keeps her six year old off school.

This is such a non-issue!

Just tell you kid it’s a bit of fun in school and Year 4 are pretending to be elves.
6-8 year olds are not going to be keeping this secret and the school won’t expect them too

Write your own letter as usual.

Yes it's a terrible idea.

It's also discriminatory on gtounds of religion or belief because it makes things difficult for those who believe in santa.

You should have the right to demand that your child is given other activities to do elsewhere when this stuff is going on in future.

I can see why the school wouldn't automatically send copies to parents but there should be a procedure where you can aak for a copy if you want to.

Damage limitation - before the y4 letters are sent you could write your own letter from the elves detailing some of the preparationwork going on at the moment and giving a description of a hilatious accident that has unfortunately resulted in her recent letter to santa being destroyed while it was in the room where elves write replies so please could she write a new one asap.

Compete non issue.
YABU to think you can’t send more than one letter. He’s not actually real.

The year 4 replies are the worst bit. Like you say lots of 8 year olds still believe in Santa. And they will soon tell their siblings etc that they wrote the letters.

I would still do a "proper letter" to Santa at home if that's what you usually do.

You should follow this up with an email to the head OP. It’s completely ridiculous! And recruit other parents to email too.