Silence in the waiting room

[Meatandseventeenveg]

Was at the doctor's with my 2 year old this afternoon. We were playing in the children's corner of the room, nothing noisy but just a chat about the pictures of the animals in the room, and DD was also making the animal sounds.

Another person in waiting room told DD to be quiet as there are sick people there (at this point it was just us three in the waiting room). I'm afraid I snapped back that my daughter is sick as well, and turned away.

My daughter, the angel, understood the woman and proceeded to talk in a whisper until the woman left.

So WIBU to think that toddlers are allowed to talk in the doctor's waiting room?

@MissyB1

Adults can be quiet or silent because they are er… adults? Kids are kids, if adults can’t cope with kids being in the waiting room, well it’s hard cheese really.

Yes, the adults struggling with the noise from kids can just go wait elsewhere, can't they!

Honestly - I do wonder how some people actually get through the day with so many trivial things to get wound up about.

Either the woman had mental health issues and would snap or she was an arse (like one or two on here). Ignore it - you’re doing absolutely nothing wrong by speaking to your child.

We are used to our own children and don't alway appreciate how loud or annoying they can seem to others!
I think the animal noises were a step too far.

You really can’t imagine how someone who’s experiencing terrible headaches, ear ache, is feeling disoriented, dizzy, sleep deprived, waiting for results of potentially difficult test etc might be better off and prefer a quiet or silent waiting room?

It's fine for them to 'prefer' a quiet room but waiting rooms at the GP are not designated quiet rooms so it shouldn't be an expectation, no. Sometimes people talk, kids play and realistically a child playing isn't going to make these illnesses worse. Also I do actually struggle with imagination. I'm autistic and it's not something that comes easily to me.

@claymodels

I wouldn't have a problem with a 2 year old playing and being communicative. I find it joyful when parents interact well with their children. I'm not sure what difference a silent waiting room makes to anybody's illnesses anyway.

I agree with this. I am an old boot and a small child being entertained wouldn't bother me at all. Your DD sounds lovely OP.

Why did you 'snap' back? Looking for an argument? Can't you just diffuse the situation and say 'sorry, didn't realise she was being annoying' and smile?

Maybe it was in her phrasing - if she'd said, I'm so sorry, I'm finding it difficult to cope with the noise, please could you try to be quieter, then of course I'd silence my daughter straight away. It was more in the way that she insinuated that we were a general irritation that got my back up.

I hope your daughter is ok OP 💐 I understand if she’s unwell you may be feeling extra protective and sensitive too x been there

She was definitely unreasonable.

Also if she had an issue with the noise she should have raised it with you, not your child.

I've had fertility issues in the past, have been ill, been worried, been hanging by a thread, been waiting for difficult test results, and so on and I wouldn't have been bothered by the scenario you described OP. It's a waiting room, you'd expect people to chat, read, etc while waiting and for children in the children's corner to be playing. If she wanted to sit somewhere more silent then she should have asked the receptionist for a side room.

Nothing wrong with chatting but not really the best place for animal noises.

Nothing wrong with chatting but not really the best place for animal noises

Have you met a 2 year old?

@Meatandseventeenveg

Maybe it was in her phrasing - if she'd said, I'm so sorry, I'm finding it difficult to cope with the noise, please could you try to be quieter, then of course I'd silence my daughter straight away. It was more in the way that she insinuated that we were a general irritation that got my back up.

I would think she was at the end of her tether anyway. At that point, you can't always think of the right words.

People who need complete silence or can only cope with others whispering should take ownership of that and bring ear plugs or headphones and plug themselves into white noise, calming music or guided meditation. No-one should expect the world to bend to them to that extent.

I wouldn't say anything but your angels animal noises would irritate the hell put of me. Maybe bring the ipad or a book next time.

I bet OP reading a book would be accused of performance parenting. If she brought an iPad she would be accused of being lazy. Or iPad noise being annoying. Parents really can’t win sometimes because British people hate children .

@SirChenjins

Agree!!

@claymodels

You really can’t imagine how someone who’s experiencing terrible headaches, ear ache, is feeling disoriented, dizzy, sleep deprived, waiting for results of potentially difficult test etc might be better off and prefer a quiet or silent waiting room?

It's fine for them to 'prefer' a quiet room but waiting rooms at the GP are not designated quiet rooms so it shouldn't be an expectation, no. Sometimes people talk, kids play and realistically a child playing isn't going to make these illnesses worse. Also I do actually struggle with imagination. I'm autistic and it's not something that comes easily to me.

A child playing, or any noise, can make some things worse. I have a friend who suffers with psychotic depression and anxiety. If he gets anxious, he hears voices. They can be violent. In the case of the OP, if he was in the waiting room with her child, he would be hearing "punch them in the face" about OPs child. But he would be in the wrong for telling OP that they should turn it down a touch.

Also, due to my own MH issues.. a lot of noise in the waiting room would mean I would just walk out and not get seen.

A child playing, or any noise, can make some things worse.
I have a friend who suffers with psychotic depression and anxiety. If he gets anxious, he hears voices. They can be violent. In the case of the OP, if he was in the waiting room with her child, he would be hearing "punch them in the face" about OPs child. But he would be in the wrong for telling OP that they should turn it down a touch.

If he is psychotic and hearing voices it would be sensible to ask for his own waiting space, which is a reasonable request in any GP surgery. I don't think people should take on the responsibility of silence where it isn't requested just in case someone like your friend appears.

because British people hate children

Nothing to do with nationality - and everything to do with personality. We’ve all witnessed intolerance other nationalities.

My youngest got told off in the hospital he wasn't being loud but everyone was pretty indulgent with him complete strangers playing cars with him he was spinning around making a quiet mmmmm noise like a bee when a woman dissolved into hysterical crying screaming can't you keep control of your child! I was so shocked I said "I think its blatantly obvious I cannot" I took him away from her and the secretary said she would call us when it was our turn another woman came down to apologise for her saying no-one else thought he was a problem and telling me about her autistic grandson (my son was suspected autistic at the time) the woman who was hysterical was being scowled at by the entire waiting room and her husband was fuming with her to this day im not sure who overreacted more her or the waiting room of people

If she had just said nicely I would have moved him sooner

I think people in general have become so intolerant when there is no need

@XenoBitch

Also, due to my own MH issues.. a lot of noise in the waiting room would mean I would just walk out and not get seen.

But as you say, these are your issues.

It sounds like you were both a bit inconsiderate, lesson learned
I hope you got good news for their test results though

@XenoBitch

Also, due to my own MH issues.. a lot of noise in the waiting room would mean I would just walk out and not get seen.

What do you do to manage that?