Can't we just send our kids to school and not have constant events or texts to think about

[monotonousmum]

I probably am being a little unreasonable, but I can't be the only one who thinks like this.

Eldest started school in September....I say September but in reality it was a complicated mix of an hour one week, 2 hours the next, then a week of mornings (one day with lunch), finally starting full time first week of October. I was already wondering how anyone actually manages to work.

I work full time, as does my husband. 1 younger child in nursery. School only contact one parent for general day to day stuff, and that falls to me (which is another issue in itself).

So...each week I have anywhere between 5-20 texts from the school (don't park in the car park, don't forget it pj day next week, sponsorship money due yesterday, school photo day, school dinner reminder etc etc), a selection of emails (usually with attachments that are too long for text), some letters in the book bag, notes in the back or front of the reading record book.
Sometimes there is stuff on the school calendar which hasn't been mentioned elsewhere.

I'm totally overwhelmed. Some of the info is repeated in several places (e.g. text to tell us we've received an email about children in need), but just the amount of info was totally unexpected to me.

There's all sorts of sponsored events, dress up days, changes to snacks or schedules.

Can't I just drop my kid to school, they teach her to to read and write (among other things) and then I pick her up and ask her what she's had for lunch and what she learned?? (Not that she ever remembers either).

Is the school OTT or are they all like this? Am I the only one not coping?

I get you. I can't keep up.

Also all the events they ask for contribution to. Odd sock day coming up! Before it was wear something yellow... Can't remember the others. But considering we don't tend to carry cash it's quite annoying having to go get change to pay for the multitude of things they want money for. Would prefer if we could pay on parent pay rather than put the money in a bucket.

@TwittleBee

I'm wondering if our children have started in the same school OP!

It's so chaotic and I'm struggling. Especially as I'm not remotely an organised person or someone who knows how to remember things (I'm very much out of sight out of mind)

I am quite organised and I still struggle!

Mixed feelings about this as I really missed all the events and activities when it stopped for covid- the extra stuff really adds to the richness of the kids’ experience and creates a link between home and school.

That said, the random way in which primary schools communicate sometimes is completely baffling- there should be one form of communication (eg email) and the minimum of separate messages. I once asked our school secretary why the school couldn’t give us dates for school plays etc in advance and was told it was because they didn’t want to “bombard us with information” which made me think they didn’t know much about how the majority of workplaces operate.

Drives me mad. High school hasn’t been as bad as primary was but on top of the emails and texts we also have an app to check notifies and kids homework. And then there’s the constant nursery emails and app notifications asking if anyone has taken home some item of Clothing or other by mistake and positive covid notifications. Ugh.

What annoys me is when my eldest registered for primary it was my partner who
Filled the forms out and put his details
Down first and still I was the one to receive all the bloody admin

Completely agree about the channels of communication - surely just pick one and make sure everything is on there! Our school uses texts, emails, the newsletter, Class Dojo, Google classroom and paper letters sent home in bags and there is no consistency in terms of what type of communication goes via which medium (I wouldn’t mind so much if there was some form of organisation / plan behind the multi-channel approach but it’s so haphazard!). I also find it baffling how they select what information is to be communicated. When my son’s class got a new TA, not a peep; at the same time we receive approximately 500 notifications about a second hand uniform sale!

@cowburp I had two kid at the school so it was four messages about needing a barrow, then saying they had got one (plus a couple of messages about why they needed it although I can’t remember what that was) x 2!

If you could see it from the other side, you'd understand why so much communication is necessary. Believe me, no-one has the time to send out messaging just for the sake of it.

[quote Nicknacky]@cowburp I had two kid at the school so it was four messages about needing a barrow, then saying they had got one (plus a couple of messages about why they needed it although I can’t remember what that was) x 2![/quote]
Someone earlier said it cost the school they were at 50p a text! Very expensive wheelbarrow.

Those comparing it to businesses are being unfair. At my workplace which is small we have a comms officer whose job it is to do internal and external comms. Schools don't have one person to do this.

YANBU
...although I will caveat that an enormous amount of the information dump we are getting is covid related and ever changing protocols which the school obviously can't do anything about.

However I also work ft, and have 2 at high school and the school have 2 parent info platforms, a payment facility, and a homework app, all of which require a login and password , and send multiple emails and notifications daily. We get more than 5 messages and emails a day a lot of the time and I too find it overwhelming (although I know lots of MN poo-poo "mental load") Our school send to both parents and DH objected to being "parent 2" despite never reading (let alone actioning) a single email from school.

The other day school sent an email about years 9-11 flu jabs referencing their earlier email concerning years 7-8. I hadn't received the earlier one so I queried it with school. It later transpired that DH had received the email but ignored it because it was from school (which is obviously a division of labour/responsibility issue rather than a school problem!)

I will add, much as MN absolutely despises class whatsapp groups they are handy in primary school, if you happen to have forgotten that tomorrow is dresses an adjective day or wear yellow socks, or that you need to bring in a printed tube and a balloon on Tuesday.

• pringle tube

@Iamnotthe1

If you could see it from the other side, you'd understand why so much communication is necessary. Believe me, no-one has the time to send out messaging just for the sake of it.

I do see it from the other side and I disagree. The communication from schools (including the one I work in!) is consistently shit.

Same! And then you have the class whatsapp group! In ours one if the mum screanshots the email and then sends it all to us again with comments! It’s dreadful!!

I particularly become disproportionately cheesed when, having dutifully read and digested yet another missive, a follow up come to say the date/time/colour were incorrect. Does no one proof read these things?

And agree, the staggered Year R start is utter bollocks.

@Pumperthepumper

Shit in what way?

If I use my school as an example, everything coming up is communicated clearly in the school newsletter which comes out once a fortnight and always contains every date across the rest of the year and explanations for the events in the short-term future. It's sent as a digital copy directly to parents so they can always have it to hand if they wish. You'd think that was perfectly clear and easy to use but a significant number of our parents don't bother to read it. It's apparently our fault because they don't want to have to read the newsletter.

So we have to send reminder messages otherwise the children miss out. We need to send one a week before the event otherwise some parents moan that they didn't have notice (and it's our fault they can't be ready). We need to send another the day before otherwise some parents moan that they forgot (and it's our fault for not reminding them).

Despite these three very clear communications, we then also get parents emailing, calling, asking at the door with questions that have already been answered three times in the three prior communications. But that, again, is our fault because we can't expect them to read those.

So what are we supposed to do when there are some parents who want to devolve all responsibility to the school? We could leave them and cut the communication right back but then the only people who would miss out would be the children and it's not their fault.

I think all schools are like this nowadays!
Our school has on numerous occasions even emailed and text to say there's a burst pipe few streets away, sewage somewhere burst, lollipop man/lady not available on X road, homeowners complaining parents are parking in front of the drive, homeowners complaining why are parents standing in front of their house whilst waiting for their child LOL, there's so many other crap that I just look at the title and decide if I want to read it

What I can’t stand (as someone that doesn’t really do much social media / online stuff) Are the multiple apps and online platforms we are meant to use. Insight, Google Classroom, Marvellous Me, Class, Tapestry, Mathswatch, MathsGenie, Scopay are just a few of what I’ve been asked to have on my phone for homework. Each of them has different logins / tasks for completion and those are just the ones I remember, there are more. That’s in addition to the books, spellings and worksheets given out by the school in hard copy. It’s way too much and I’m simply not able to keep on top of it all in addition to the multiple requests from schools mentioned on this thread and my other responsibilities in life.

I sacked off the class WhatsApp after the second time I saw my friends name appear in a WhatsApp message and thought I was replying privately to her, asking her stuff about her private life and divulging stuff about mine. Followed by angry messages from her and hastily deleted messages from me.

YANBU. I had this conversation with my ex the other day - text messages, emails and several different apps we have to look at for information and manage homework as well as checking the physical books in her bag for notes too! It's exhausting! Its information overload by numerous sources - it wasn't this difficult when I was at school - an occasional flyer and newsletter in our bag 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

I completely agree my sons school is the same, they’re Always asking for money too ALL the time. They’ll always have non uniform days and you have to pay a pound, take cakes in, school trip, pudsey bear thing, all kind of stuff wear Green Day pay £3, I work and I just cannot keep up with the amount of stuff they send out it’s insane, drives me round the bend. Feel sorry for people with more than one child it must cost them an absolute bomb!

I ❤️ the mums in the class WhatsApp who summarise all the nonsense and just tell us what we need to do each day. Huge help - why can't the school just summarise stuff?

[quote Iamnotthe1]@Pumperthepumper

Shit in what way?

If I use my school as an example, everything coming up is communicated clearly in the school newsletter which comes out once a fortnight and always contains every date across the rest of the year and explanations for the events in the short-term future. It's sent as a digital copy directly to parents so they can always have it to hand if they wish. You'd think that was perfectly clear and easy to use but a significant number of our parents don't bother to read it. It's apparently our fault because they don't want to have to read the newsletter.

So we have to send reminder messages otherwise the children miss out. We need to send one a week before the event otherwise some parents moan that they didn't have notice (and it's our fault they can't be ready). We need to send another the day before otherwise some parents moan that they forgot (and it's our fault for not reminding them).

Despite these three very clear communications, we then also get parents emailing, calling, asking at the door with questions that have already been answered three times in the three prior communications. But that, again, is our fault because we can't expect them to read those.

So what are we supposed to do when there are some parents who want to devolve all responsibility to the school? We could leave them and cut the communication right back but then the only people who would miss out would be the children and it's not their fault.[/quote]
Shit in exactly that way - you send out a newsletter once a fortnight, why? What’s in it?

It’s obviously too much if people aren’t reading it. Why not make it once a month? Why not share a calendar instead so parents can check week on week themselves? Why not plan for the year so everyone knows exactly what’s happening and only send one newsletter?

Why continue to do something that so obviously doesn’t work?

@Pumperthepumper
It’s obviously too much if people aren’t reading it. Why not make it once a month? Why not share a calendar instead so parents can check week on week themselves? Why not plan for the year so everyone knows exactly what’s happening and only send one newsletter?

Why continue to do something that so obviously doesn’t work?

Everything is planned for the year and communicated. The issue isn't that things change and parents can't keep track. I've explained why we have to keep sending things - parents blame us when they aren't reminded or forget things or miss things rather than taking that responsibility themselves and making sure that they remember.

It works for the vast majority of parents, which is why it continues. However, some parents are just disorganised and/or unreliable and so, unfortunately, the high level of communication has to happen or the children end up missing out through no fault of their own.