Can't we just send our kids to school and not have constant events or texts to think about

[monotonousmum]

I probably am being a little unreasonable, but I can't be the only one who thinks like this.

Eldest started school in September....I say September but in reality it was a complicated mix of an hour one week, 2 hours the next, then a week of mornings (one day with lunch), finally starting full time first week of October. I was already wondering how anyone actually manages to work.

I work full time, as does my husband. 1 younger child in nursery. School only contact one parent for general day to day stuff, and that falls to me (which is another issue in itself).

So...each week I have anywhere between 5-20 texts from the school (don't park in the car park, don't forget it pj day next week, sponsorship money due yesterday, school photo day, school dinner reminder etc etc), a selection of emails (usually with attachments that are too long for text), some letters in the book bag, notes in the back or front of the reading record book.
Sometimes there is stuff on the school calendar which hasn't been mentioned elsewhere.

I'm totally overwhelmed. Some of the info is repeated in several places (e.g. text to tell us we've received an email about children in need), but just the amount of info was totally unexpected to me.

There's all sorts of sponsored events, dress up days, changes to snacks or schedules.

Can't I just drop my kid to school, they teach her to to read and write (among other things) and then I pick her up and ask her what she's had for lunch and what she learned?? (Not that she ever remembers either).

Is the school OTT or are they all like this? Am I the only one not coping?

@WildExcuses

no they dont! the phones the staff are given to use while at work are not for personal calls, and they are normally just landline phones but cordless, or if the site is too big then its a mobile phone but the calls are locked to only have calls from within the site. they are not for you to give out the phone number to anyone and everyone! @WildExcuses**

My partner works for a very well known National company. He had a company issued iPhone which he can also use for personal use. He had the same on his last company to. He works at home now but when he was in the office there were no landlines, just mobiles.

I have the same. There are no limits on who you can call - locking them to only call/receive calls from certain numbers would cause a lot of problems with clients who have our work mobile numbers. Mine is on my email signature. There are also no strict limits on the apps you can download on your phone (there are general sensible limits of not downloading anything dodgy), I have my fb and Instagram on mine. An DD’s nursery has it as an alternative contact number for me. Plenty of people who’ve worked there a long time don’t have a separate personal phone anymore.

I assume each of our offices has a landline on the reception desk, I’d have to google the number though, and if anyone called it the staff there would email me or ring my mobile.

It's all for the children to have extra events to make life fun. Remember lockdown walks without the hot chocolates in the cafe afterwards think of it like that.

Nope you are spot on! Think I’m an unfit mother all you want but I was in work 8-5 yesterday then had my sons parents evening at 6 pm. Really couldn’t be bothered. And it’s always the same twoddle! I know my son can get easily distracted I’ve heard this every parents evening for 10 years. On top of that constant events, coffee mornings etc. All well and good if you don’t work but when you do it’s too much.

that is not the norm!

I don’t know anyone without this set up in national companies so it can’t be that unusual.

@WildExcuses

that is not the norm!

I don’t know anyone without this set up in national companies so it can’t be that unusual.

@WildExcuses what national companies are you talking about? your going to have to name them

OP, I'm assuming you have complained to the headteacher about this rather than just post on mumsnet?

@Covidwoes

OP, I'm assuming you have complained to the headteacher about this rather than just post on mumsnet?

Why would you assume that?

Before the text message and email platforms, schools were much more organised...all info had to photocopied and photocopying is expensive so everything went on one newsletter a week and important stuff had a special letter.

Remember what we used to do before mobile phones? You would be where you said you would be at the right time. We are all guilty of lazy arranging nowadays, including schools. It's all too easy to send an email or a quick text especially when Ofsted is breathing down your neck about 'parent engagement'.

OP YANBU it’s an absolute joke.

For a start if resources are scarce then schools should properly organise themselves to take that into account and think properly about how they plan their communications. Not just airy fairy firing shit out over any of the numerous random channels with no consistency whatsoever. I can guarantee that takes up more resources than it should if it were better planned.

If people complain you need to get more hard nosed and stop capitulating, you are making everyone else’s lives harder and your own harder too. People don’t always have to get what they want.

Also totally totally agree with the previous poster about steering lessons and events away from things that require absolutely meaningless parental input (yellow hat, Pringles tubes into infinity). Surely this only ever widens gaps between pupils whose parents do these things and the children of those who don’t?

And lastly I am absolutely convinced that this sort of very minor irritant breaks down relationships between schools and parents. I’m a socially responsible parent, I want to support the school. However, this sort of thing would never fly in the actual real world. I’d be sacked if I communicated with my stakeholders like a school. I find it all absolutely ridiculous and quite frankly it undermines the school in my view. I am more likely to challenge them about things that I think are silly because they don’t seem to have good judgement. I do wonder if this is because more women are in work these days, working full time or in higher positions and this crap would never fly in our working worlds.

When I was at school my parents had very little contact at all about anything (eons ago though). I don't think they even went to parents evenings. In fact I don't think the school held them!

what national companies are you talking about? your going to have to name them

The people I know work for various professional service companies, IT and utilities.

I'm Chair of a PTA for a Primary School. We do send out too many communications but we also get completely slated if we don't. We asked whether it is best to communicate all events in one long email/WA (no - too much to wade through) or single ones (no - too many lots of info coming separately). Some parents will only use WA, some will only read emails from the school office, some will only read email from the class rep, some will only look at our FB page. And no matter what you do you'll always get some fucking repeat offender parent on the day saying how are they supposed to know about this event.

And I (and the others on the team) only do it because 90% of money from the Gov goes on teachers. There is no money for essentials, never mind nice to have. Which is why we have been funding outdoor roof/shelter repairs, toilet refurbishments and basic technology needs of the school.

So yes, it is a lot, but it's to raise money for your child's school and help to educate them and enhance their time and learning.

And I'm a volunteer and all I get is fucking whinging (love the PTA bashing there has been in this thread). Which is why I'm standing down.

So why did you have children? Is your child not allowed to have a 'social' life? These things are all a part of growing up. I am part of two parent groups, one parent teacher group, get daily at least one message on the school app. I think its great that they remind me while my children are too young to manage this information. Just wait until they start college and you don t get any information at all and you will regret complaining now. Enjoy it while its happening. Children are only little once. X

@Doireallywanttodothis

I'm Chair of a PTA for a Primary School. We do send out too many communications but we also get completely slated if we don't. We asked whether it is best to communicate all events in one long email/WA (no - too much to wade through) or single ones (no - too many lots of info coming separately). Some parents will only use WA, some will only read emails from the school office, some will only read email from the class rep, some will only look at our FB page. And no matter what you do you'll always get some fucking repeat offender parent on the day saying how are they supposed to know about this event.

And I (and the others on the team) only do it because 90% of money from the Gov goes on teachers. There is no money for essentials, never mind nice to have. Which is why we have been funding outdoor roof/shelter repairs, toilet refurbishments and basic technology needs of the school.

So yes, it is a lot, but it's to raise money for your child's school and help to educate them and enhance their time and learning.

And I'm a volunteer and all I get is fucking whinging (love the PTA bashing there has been in this thread). Which is why I'm standing down.

My least favourite thing is the whinging PTA. And I’m on our PTA.

I would ask them to remove the mobile number and email for Comms. Retain for emergency use only.it sounds overwhelming.

You cannot be the only parent thinking this..

Surely by ott Comms people miss the genuinely important stuff. It's all too much and they either need to control themselves OR they need different Comms options for different parents. I doubt most people are ok with what you've described.

What do they do if parents don't have a smartphone or email etc? Not everyone does.

You might be really organised but sadly there are a lot who aren't and need the reminder. Our school had an inset day - a few texts, a letter at the start of.term, on the website and on social media. There were still parents WhatsApp ing asking where we all were!

Completely agree, it's part of child rearing, happy to do it - and #doireallywantthis, sorry you are standing down because of whinging parents

You wait for Christmas time! It's enough to drive you to exhaustion. Bloody Christmas Fayres, crafty things you have to make, stupid outfits they need, bloody CHRISTMAS JUMPER day where you are guilted into buying vile jumpers for charity, cakes to bake. It's awful.

It’s a nightmare. Mine are year 6 and 7. It’s neverending emails / texts / donations / IT issues or sign ups/ PTA…..!!!!! It never ends!

@WildExcuses

what national companies are you talking about? your going to have to name them

The people I know work for various professional service companies, IT and utilities.

@ WildExcuses yes so do my son and my son in law, both have company phones neither are allowed to use them for personal calls, we are talking about one being a large bank, the other being in a huge chemical works on teesside! the phones are for purely work purposes

@WildExcuses

what national companies are you talking about? your going to have to name them

The people I know work for various professional service companies, IT and utilities.

I have a similar set up to what is described by sickandtired and wildexcuses and I work for PWC. I imagine the other three of the big 4 financial services firms have the same. When your mobile is used a lot for client calls there can’t be restrictions on who it can call. And I suspect part of the reason they’re happy for you to use it for personal use is that it means you’re more likely to have it on you. So more likely to see and reply to the client email, or whoever else needs to contact you, outside of 9-5:30.

Op I'm sure if you sent your child to school in uniform , the only one not dressers up, you'd have enough to say.

My school issued a school calendar at the beginning of the academic year. There was none of this ‘when’s sports day, when’s the play…’ because it was all in the calendar at the start of the year.

We didn’t do special themed costume days ever which as an autistic person I’m frankly thankful for.

My parents paid a fortune for my education but I don’t think it requires money for a school to be organised and not fill the weeks with pointless ad hoc shit.

Kids generally enjoy these events which is nice I always think

@arethereanyleftatall

Problem is, for every parent thinking 'people stop with the fucking messages' there's another parent thinking 'I wonder what the school is doing for children in need.' School can't win.

It’s not so much the volume of emails it’s more the constant asking for money , pay a pound for this , take cakes in then kids can buy a cake for 50p , wear odd socks pay a £1 it’s all this kind of stuff all the time