Swimming lesson changing room rules . AIBU

[ExplodingCarrots]

Since children's swimming lessons has re-commenced at our local leisure centre they have changed how the changing rooms are used.
There are no longer separate male and female changing . The way they've worked it is that deep end lessons use the male changing rooms and shallow end lessons use the female changing. They're very strict with this rule and have people manning it.

This means that boys and girls are mixed . My DD is 8, and is in a deep end lesson so uses the male changing room. There are no cubicles in there and it's all benches and open plan. She has started puberty very early (and is very dark haired) and is obviously very self conscious . The female changing rooms on the other hand have 10+ cubicles.

She got very upset at the realisation she'd have to change in front of boys up to 12 years old and men who are there with their kids. The first lesson we struggled to hide her in a corner but now we just put a long towel robe over her and we leave straight away ..which is a pain because it's a 30 minute drive home and she's freezing.

When I brought it up with reception I had a sympathetic nod and said yes they understood it was difficult but because of Covid that's the way it is and because of mixing we are not allowed to use female changing to use a cubicle.

Has anybody else's leisure centre got this set up?

Would you feel comfortable with your developing DC changing in front of the opposite sex with no access to cubicles ? I'm sure the boys hate changing in front of the girls too. If they're only toddlers I could understand but most of the deep end lessons are children 7-12.

I want to gauge if IBU before I send an email to the leisure centre.

WTF are they thinking?!

I'd go to the newspapers in case the council drags their notoriously slow feet to look into it. It will take ages. Just go to the papers.

I usually open threads like this ready for an eye roll and preparing myself for someone being overly dramatic but...my god this is awful!

We have a local leisure centre run by everyone active and through Covid even last summer they didn't have such a bizarre policy.

Depending on the response you get OP, I'd be inclined to post something publicly if they have a Facebook page or something. I'm certain other parents are feeling the same.

That sounds awful, I doubt the boys will be undressed with girls in their changing spaces too, it would be different if there were cubicals, but they can't expect young girls to get changed in the open with men around.

Well, the perves will be scoping out the deep end at that pool! What a fucking insane rule!!! So dangerous!!!

This post has really shocked me OP. It's totally unacceptable. Horrific. Your poor girl. Please do not allow her to change in this male changing room.

Your daughter (or any female) should absolutely not be compelled to take her clothes off in front of men and boys. The pool are in breach of the Equality Act 2010 which entitles your daughter to a single sex changing space. Covid measures do not over-ride this.

OP, what is the maximum age of girls who could find themselves in the 'male' changing rooms under this arrangement? There's usually an age at which leisure centres say children have to start using the changing room of their sex, (or alternatively use mixed-sex family changing areas). If the girls this will affect could potentially be above that age limit that would also be worth highlighting in your email.

I don't know how it's set up for regular swimming like lane swimming at the moment etc This is how it is for children's swimming lessons. But it's still not right in my eyes.
When they were doing family swims in the holidays it was learner pool swimmers used female changing , shallow end swimming used male and the deep end didn't have access to any so you had to change at the side of the pool. It was a bit of a weird way to sort it.

Did someone say "perverts' charter?"

@littleburn

Your daughter (or any female) should absolutely not be compelled to take her clothes off in front of men and boys. The pool are in breach of the Equality Act 2010 which entitles your daughter to a single sex changing space. Covid measures do not over-ride this.

OP, what is the maximum age of girls who could find themselves in the 'male' changing rooms under this arrangement? There's usually an age at which leisure centres say children have to start using the changing room of their sex, (or alternatively use mixed-sex family changing areas). If the girls this will affect could potentially be above that age limit that would also be worth highlighting in your email.

I believe the rule was over 8s were to use the correct changing room for their gender. Since Covid they changed it to this way. So , now older children are changing together in the worst changing room for privacy.

What's bat shit is that it's most likely older Children in the deep end.

Mine have dryrobe type things. I wouldn't be gappy though

What is the oldest age of a child in this place?

That’s utterly shocking. I’m always amazed that men are happy with that set up too. I couldn’t think of one decent one that would change with young girls and women.

@turnaroundtime

What is the oldest age of a child in this place?

It's hard to tell. My DD is 8 but looks much older. But there are dads in there with their kids. I'm sure adults swimming isn't set up like this because surely there'd be an uproar . But kids starting puberty ..yeah that's fine.

Wow - what a set up. Complain!

It does sound odd!

Could she go pool ready in a costume and onesie? And then just stick the onesie back on for the drive home.?

Absolutely disgusting, your poor daughter. I would raise hell over this. What a fucking stupid, short sighted rule.

I have a poncho towel for these occasions and DD changes on the beach under it.

However no I would not be putting up with this on an ongoing basis and would have done as you did and emailed the centre.

Why don’t you name and shame them, OP?

Are they on Twitter?

100% not unreasonable. Frankly actually really worrying. I would take to twitter on this if I were you, NOT because it's the best way of resolving things, but it certainly can be the quickest and I genuinely would have real concerns for child safety in this situation. Good luck.

That setup isn’t right. I’d complain and would change the swimming pool altogether if they didn’t fix that nonsense.

Unbelievable.

They could stagger it, e g boys from 1pm - 1.15pm, then check it's empty and girls change from 1.15pm - 1.30pm. No excuse for expecting them to change together.

Stagerring it wouldnt really help if the classes are mixed, they'd need to have all boys class / all girls class. But even that gives the issue of a Dad potentially helping a young girl and vice versa a Mum helping a younger boy.

They need to have cubicals of some description, the pool my kids have been having lessons on dont want the kids / mums & dads in the changing rooms so set up pop up tents not ideal but its at least private.

This sounds terrible - can I suggest she uses a weatherproof changing robe please?

My 10 yr old is avid slalom kayaker and often needs to change in car park or on riverbank. You need to buy the changing robe so there is enough room inside that they can have it zipped up and pull their arms and head inside. It is like a portable cubicle and very useful for privacy. My dd is nearly 11 and has the small adult

www.twobarefeet.co.uk/wetsuits/accessories/changing-robes.html